OKCupid - Race Matters

[InfinityCurve]

You still have preferences I figure, you just quit paying attention to them.

[Elrond]

Originally Posted by Servina

I don't prefer white men.

The bias towards white men is to do with the cultural dominance of white men. White men shape everything in the west. They decide what's in or out legally and culturally. That means that to sustain social dominance, they've created the illusion that they're the more attractive choice, based on arbitrary reasons that are ingrained in us from birth.

If you go back to James81's favourite thread, "Women, do you consider yourself a feminist." You'll see that all cultural choices and preferences are shaped by white men. It's all down to the power they have. To be born a white man is a blessing, because you'll never know what it's like to have someone else's judgment of you shape anything in your life.

It's even gone so far as to create a bias among black men for white women! This really is to do with beauty stereotypes and media images.

*pats cigar* WHAT, WHAT DID YOU SAY!? Oh sorry, it is hard hearing you from up here. But yes when you do mention it, being the king of the World is quite great, great view too!

[Lamusa]

Studies and statistics reveal nothing about fundamental truths. When will we stop framing our perceptions by what we hear and see in the media? When will we choose to broaden our perceptions about the brilliant diversity of people who inhabit this world? There is an abundance of love and romantic relationships out here available for everybody. When we try to frame love and attraction in a political context we get studies like these.

The concept of “black” in and of itself is not only political it carries with it the weight of superstition and fear. Couple this word with the word, “woman” and it’s like we can’t see straight. So we choose to buy into the illusion of the unfortunate “other” and develop myths about entire groups of people. When we realize that love and attraction can transcend the narrowness of any superstition, political spin or agenda we increase our awareness about what truly matters in this world.

Black women – fat, skinny, tall, short, old, young, wealthy, poor, light, medium, dark, happy, sad, incarcerated, un-incarcerated, educated, uneducated, religious, agnostic, atheistic, ill, healthy, single, married, shacked up, divorced, lesbian, straight are beautiful, gorgeous, powerful, intelligent, wise, sensual, spiritual, electric, sexy, charming, loving and lovable human beings just as exquisite as any one of you.

Lamusa

[InfinityCurve]

Originally Posted by Lamusa

Studies and statistics reveal nothing about fundamental truths.

I think they can. Not always of course but ususally.

Originally Posted by Lamusa

When will we stop framing our perceptions by what we hear and see in the media? When will we choose to broaden our perceptions about the brilliant diversity of people who inhabit this world? There is an abundance of love and romantic relationships out here available for everybody. When we try to frame love and attraction in a political context we get studies like these.

Who's talking about politics?

Originally Posted by Lamusa

The concept of “black” in and of itself is not only political it carries with it the weight of superstition and fear. Couple this word with the word, “woman” and it’s like we can’t see straight. So we choose to buy into the illusion of the unfortunate “other” and develop myths about entire groups of people.

Sexual attraction is deeper than that (though certainly affected by it).

I don't like dark haired Mediterranean & Slavic girls because of any deep rooted myths about them. I just like them. Women of similar ancestry to me (Anglo-Saxon) are less attractive, especially tall, skinny blonds. If I was a mere victim of society I'd love this type because it's what's supposed to be "hot" (as portrayed by fashion magazines run by men who aren't even sexually attracted to females). I could be attracted to a woman from almost anywhere but it's not a sin to notice general trends (it's not like I'm ruled by them).

Originally Posted by Lamusa

When we realize that love and attraction can transcend the narrowness of any superstition, political spin or agenda we increase our awareness about what truly matters in this world.

I don't think most people base their sexual attraction on superstition or politics.

Originally Posted by Lamusa

Black women – fat, skinny, tall, short, old, young, wealthy, poor, light, medium, dark, happy, sad, incarcerated, un-incarcerated, educated, uneducated, religious, agnostic, atheistic, ill, healthy, single, married, shacked up, divorced, lesbian, straight are beautiful, gorgeous, powerful, intelligent, wise, sensual, spiritual, electric, sexy, charming, loving and lovable human beings just as exquisite as any one of you.

All people are not equally lovable. You haven't met my mother-in-law.

I wouldn't pursue a sexual relationship with a lesbian for example because she wouldn't be interested in one. I wouldn't cry & call her a big meanie for rejecting me for my maleness. Sexual attraction is always exclusive. (though the incarcerated generally have more lax standards).

Everyone's got their own tastes & to make them as wicked or "superstitious" for it is as silly as calling someone a racist cause they don't like Chinese food.

If you accept & love yourself chances are you'll find someone else to love you too.

[Still Growing]

Originally Posted by Lionman

.. and oriental guys for example don't seem to get much either longterm or shorterm.

Technically the term "Oriental" is for objects like art or rugs and not for people. I often hear people who are not so familiar with Asia use the term Oriental when referring to Asians.

Many Asian people are slightly offended by being called "Oriental" however they know its not said with malice so they typically don't make an issue of it.

Just thought I'd point it out.

[scotthegeek]

Originally Posted by Marth

I don't like this study at all or any race to dating fact sheet. And I lost a lot of respect for okcupid.

they are run by a lot of geeks and they like to crunch a lot of numbers and I one study they did was guys with iphone had twice as much sex. I don't know how they figure that out. I wish it was that easy to just buy an iphone

its funny that a lot of people like to tan so dark is good. most people date within there race so the results don't surprise me blacks or in the minority. If they crunch the numbers for a black dating site I would think the numbers would be different.

Scott

[Lionman]

Originally Posted by Still Growing

Technically the term "Oriental" is for objects like art or rugs and not for people. I often hear people who are not so familiar with Asia use the term Oriental when referring to Asians.

Many Asian people are slightly offended by being called "Oriental" however they know its not said with malice so they typically don't make an issue of it.

Just thought I'd point it out.

Apparently American Asians take more issue with it.
In England, the word Asian refers to people from India and the surrounding locations.

[Still Growing]

Originally Posted by Lionman

Apparently American Asians take more issue with it.
In England, the word Asian refers to people from India and the surrounding locations.

Its not that American Asians have a huge issue with it; its simply that objects are considered "Oriental" and when someone uses the term "Oriental" it just comes from their lack of knowing this fact.

Yes India is included in Asia.

If someone is from Japan they are Japanese and Asian but they are not Oriental.
If someone is from India they are Indian and Asian.

I've noticed that a lot of people also in the UK hold their fingers up to the corner of their eyes and make their eyes slanted when referring to Asian people. This is something much more common in the UK than in the US and yes that is found to be offensive.

In my experiences, the typical American seems to be much more familiar with Asia than they are about Europe. Since more Americans come from Europe originally you'd think it would be the opposite. Not sure why.

[Lionman]

Originally Posted by Still Growing

Its not that American Asians have a huge issue with it; its simply that objects are considered "Oriental" and when someone uses the term "Oriental" it just comes from their lack of knowing this fact.

Yes India is included in Asia.

If someone is from Japan they are Japanese and Asian but they are not Oriental.
If someone is from India they are Indian and Asian.

Ok, here if you say someone is Asian they assume you mean Indian/Pakistani etc. I suppose that "East Asian" would be the correct way of referring to someone say from China, in the UK . I've never knew the word Oriental was offensive, but thanks for the info

I've noticed that a lot of people also in the UK hold their fingers up to the corner of their eyes and make their eyes slanted when referring to Asian people.

Many people in the UK have trouble typing the word "Asian" because of that reason.
In all seriousness though, I haven't actually seen a lot of that here to be honest.

[Dharma]

Originally Posted by Cochonette

Quote:

From my you-create-your-own-reality POV, the white males say 'yes' more and the black female less so.

What they say 'yes' to is their reception of self. How much do I receive myself (say yes) in the arena of dating and relationships? That's what the data shows me.

[beast]

Originally Posted by InfinityCurve

You still have preferences I figure, you just quit paying attention to them.

Eh. I know this wasn't directed at me, but I have to agree with supertom. I've always been sort of baffled that everyone has a "type". My preference is for people that I'm attracted to, and there are plenty of things which instantly turn me off, but it's more of a vibe. I've been very attracted to people of all different races, builds, heights, skin-tones, and I don't think the fact that I don't have a "type" has anything to do with me not paying attention to them.

I mean, what do these men, who are all some of the sexiest men in the world IMHO, have in common...besides being smokin' hot?








Yeah. I hijacked this thread with hot men pictures. I was tired of reading comments like "hey, I'm not racist, I have black friends!!" WHAT!

[curiouslyrandom]

Originally Posted by Still Growing

In my experiences, the typical American seems to be much more familiar with Asia than they are about Europe. Since more Americans come from Europe originally you'd think it would be the opposite. Not sure why.

Can't speak for the rest of the nation, but in California, it's because we have a very large Asian population going back for generations. It also helps that Asian pop culture is very popular right now.

[beast]

Originally Posted by Still Growing

In my experiences, the typical American seems to be much more familiar with Asia than they are about Europe. Since more Americans come from Europe originally you'd think it would be the opposite. Not sure why.

Eh, most people would probably be familiar with China, India, and Japan, but perhaps not many of the other highly populated Asian countries, like Indonesia, Bangladesh, and the Philippines. Probably only a small percentage could king Kyrgyzstan on a map.

[curiouslyrandom]

In SF, when going out to eat with my friends, it's often a question of Thai, Lao, Filipino, Japanese, Chinese (and then, which region?), Korean, Indian, Pakistani, and so on. I mean, unless we head out for Ethiopian or Moroccan...

When I was little, we had a choice of Italian or French for dinner out, and sometimes Chinese dim sum for Sunday brunch.

[InfinityCurve]

Originally Posted by beast

Eh. I know this wasn't directed at me, but I have to agree with supertom. I've always been sort of baffled that everyone has a "type". My preference is for people that I'm attracted to, and there are plenty of things which instantly turn me off, but it's more of a vibe. I've been very attracted to people of all different races, builds, heights, skin-tones, and I don't think the fact that I don't have a "type" has anything to do with me not paying attention to them.

I mean, what do these men, who are all some of the sexiest men in the world IMHO, have in common...besides being smokin' hot?








Yeah. I hijacked this thread with hot men pictures. I was tired of reading comments like "hey, I'm not racist, I have black friends!!" WHAT!

Hi Beast, first off I want to say you're a cutey (even though you're not my "type" [too much like me geneticly I'd reckon]).

Regarding your choice of pin-ups, I will take your word for it that you find them all hawt. That said, there's a difference between surface attraction & deep sexual attraction. I can look at a cute girl & find her sexy but if I got up close, inhaled her scent, observed the way she moved, felt her body & saw her undress I would certainly have a different feeling. Maybe better, maybe worse but, IME, the way a woman looks & the way she feels to all my senses during a sexual encounter are always very different (fortunately right now I find my woman sexy from across the room and in my arms & my lap, outside the bedroom is where the real work is ).

And they say women are even more experiential (at the expense of visual than men).

[NDN Scholar]

Originally Posted by beast

I was tired of reading comments like "hey, I'm not racist, I have black friends!!" WHAT!

Yeah, I know. Same here.

[m18pak]

Originally Posted by jasmineY

I thought racism was a solved issue especially in The States.

Hahaha, not even close. Rest assured that racism is alive and kicking.

[votoshka]

I came to a realization while reading this thread...

I had been thinking that I find white guys overall more attractive than guys of other races... in that "I find a higher proportion of white guys more attractive than blacks or asians", and then it hit me... well DUH... I SEE a much greater number of whites than I do blacks or Asians... and yet, I've seen plenty of hot guys who are black, Asian or whatever... but I don't see them in such high numbers.

Which probably means...that if there were equal numbers of whites, blacks, Asians whatever in a room, I'd probably find the same number (approximately) of each to be pretty hot! And umm... I find heaps of white guys unnattractive too... so maybe they wouldn't even be equal?

[Lionman]

Originally Posted by NDN Scholar

Yeah, I know. Same here.

Me too
wait a minute...

[beast]

Originally Posted by InfinityCurve

Hi Beast, first off I want to say you're a cutey (even though you're not my "type" [too much like me geneticly I'd reckon]).

Grrr I see what you did there! How can I argue with anything you say now?!

(Thank you!)

Regarding your choice of pin-ups, I will take your word for it that you find them all hawt. That said, there's a difference between surface attraction & deep sexual attraction. I can look at a cute girl & find her sexy but if I got up close, inhaled her scent, observed the way she moved, felt her body & saw her undress I would certainly have a different feeling. Maybe better, maybe worse but, IME, the way a woman looks & the way she feels to all my senses during a sexual encounter are always very different (fortunately right now I find my woman sexy from across the room and in my arms & my lap, outside the bedroom is where the real work is ).

And they say women are even more experiential (at the expense of visual than men).

Yeah, this is very true. I've found that there are plenty of people whom I find absolutely drop dead gorgeous, but am not at all remotely attracted to. Isn't that an argument against having a "type", though? When I think of the people I've dug in the real world, they've looked lots of different ways, but there has often been an inexplicable attraction that has nothing to do with the color or their skin or hair.

[Still Growing]

One interesting thing about the attraction to other races is that in many ways it has to do with exposure.

If you have never found yourself highly attracted to a particular race and then you move to a country and start seeing more and more of that race and eventually date someone from that race you might find yourself changing what you do and do not find as attractive. You may even find that you will start to be more attracted to that race going forward.

Its an interesting phenomenon actually.....

People generally have their own preconditions of what looks good, tastes good and sounds good however with new experiences the mind expands and your brain rewires itself. In many cases the new look, taste or sound can become preferred over the old look, taste or sound.

If you see the media promoting a certain look, body shape or race it has more to do with what the general population views as being attractive than it does with the publication as an organization.

In my life I have moved to new countries and found my attractions changing and also my taste buds changing as well.

I think most people identify themselves with what they like and don't like as if they were born that way. If someone says "Do you like the taste of raw squid" the correct response would not be "I don't like raw squid" but rather "I have not yet developed the taste for raw squid".

Technically most humans are basically the same however our exposure differences are what separate us. Isn't a more exciting way to live life and also to interact with others?