Shutting Down the Forums (Blog)

[NicB]

Oh well, sucks to see it go, but i'm grateful it was here in the first place. Thanks steve!

Besides, everyone should relax. It's not like the blog/articles are getting shut down. And i'm sure forums like this will manifest again, somewhere else.

[brendannz]

The end of the world is nigh..

Just kidding..

Originally Posted by NicB

Besides, everyone should relax. It's not like the blog/articles are getting shut down. And i'm sure forums like this will manifest again, somewhere else.

Yep, agreed

As much as it's a valid argument that people come here as a place for serious problems, part of me thinks Steve Pavlina's just an imperfect human, and doesn't owe anybody anything.

Nothing last forever, people need to adapt to change

[NicB]

Oh, and by the way: https://www.facebook.com/nicbarnshaw

That's my facebook. Somebody please let me know if there's a place like this that manifests again!
(also, if you try to add me, pls include a little note mentioning these forums, because i don't add people i don't know)

[Focus Driblet]

Originally Posted by Savage

People who don't really know me well often project a lot of false assumptions onto me (just as you've done above),

IMHO, it seems you did the same with the 'renegade members', like Angela, and it doesn't seem that you have done anything to mend it, although arguably in light of all the things that have been brought forth, the whole pd4you thing was much less harmful than you thought it was. I don't think it was the end of the world that you said what you said initially, or did, but maybe you could consider that you've made some false assumptions yourself?

But as you've made it abundantly clear, you don't really care what any of us think. Frankly you seem to have very little capacity for humility. But all relevant things has probably been said by now, so I'll stop sticking my nose in this. Peace out.

[Alice Hive]

To The Pavlina Community | Follow The Red Queen

[Plays With Life]

Originally Posted by Alice Hive

To The Pavlina Community | Follow The Red Queen

Love that your name is Alice.

[NicoleNicki]

Thank you, Steve, for everything -- your book; all of your blog articles (although I haven't read them all yet, I've really enjoyed the ones I have read); thank you, in particular, for the "The Past DOES equal the future" blog post -- I can't tell you the number of times I've said, "Nicole, you are doing a gung-ho dufus again!! Stop and rethink!"; thank you for these forums -- it was through reading a few posts on these forums that I found a few books that were life-changers for me; thank you for your recommended reading list; thank you for recommending The Journal software -- I never thought I could transition from paper and pen, and I love it so much now; thank you especially for all of the ways you've expanded my thinking just by allowing me to see your thinking process (through your blog posts, and forum posts, we don't know each other in person); and, most of all, thank you for being an example for me of a person who is constantly growing and living in alignment with his truth. Thank you and all the very best to you, your family and loved ones now and in the future.

[Alice Hive]

Originally Posted by Plays With Life

Love that your name is Alice.

Lol, actually it's not. But I think you see why I chose it as a pseudonym.

[Plays With Life]

Originally Posted by Alice Hive

Lol, actually it's not. But I think you see why I chose it as a pseudonym.

It's an excellent choice. Next time an apocalypse rolls around, I know who to look for.

[MidasGirl]

Originally Posted by Savage

Never any give? Please.

I think she was talking about 'give' in the sense that your M.O. is one where you come down really hard on anyone who challenges you in a direct and blunt way. I'm not surprised, being an Aries myself, I can understand this. It's a typical characteristic of Arieses with under-developed Emotional and Spiritual Intelligence. The Aries dark side is very overbearing, everyone who threatens its ego must be literally rammed into oblivion. You do come off as someone that NEEDS to be right no matter what.

You'll do fine though. Maybe a couple more lifetimes and your karma will eventually correct itself

You're obviously a giving person in that you allow the universe to use you to disseminate PD ideas very clearly and concisely. But that doesn't mean you necessarily practice what you preach

And btw, I'm definitely one of the people who got more out of you starting this forum than I could ever thank you for - not in terms of PD info. But I met the Love of my life here. And for that I could never thank you enough.

Namaste! Aaaand peace out! Hehe.

[Lionman]

Originally Posted by MidasGirl

It's a typical characteristic of Arieses with under-developed Emotional and Spiritual Intelligence. The Aries dark side is very overbearing, everyone who threatens its ego must be literally rammed into oblivion. You do come off as someone that NEEDS to be right no matter what.

The purpose of the Sun in Aries is to ram stuff into oblivion/creation. The issue is whether you do that in line with your values in a conscious way. The way to balance Aries is to look at it's opposite, Libra and integrate it's lessons without loosing your Ariesness. Libra ruled by Venus is about weighing things to determine the value of something. The dark side of Libra is that they just do it to death (think Lawyers) and need to ballance with Aries' impulsiveness.

Should you let a virus take over your body because it's another life form just trying to survive? Would that be in line with YOUR values? Lets say you love your girlfriend/boyfriend/friends. Would your pointless pain and death benefit them in a way that is in line in your values?

Steve, if you read this and you'd like an astrological reading feel free to PM me before the forums go down and I'll work on doing one for free. It's the least I can do for the amount of value I've gleamed from your blog. Will need your DOB+time-of-birth and any email address to send it to if so.

[slumberland]

Originally Posted by hervens

Steve, maybe you can consider putting google adsense advertisements on the forums, in exchange to keeping it active?
You mentioned that the forums didn't bring in much revenue, and it's very bandwidth intensive, so that might be a good alternative.

Does anybody know if these forums had google ads originally - or were the google ads relegated to the blog posts only? I don't remember, because I read the blog for a long time without ever posting on the forums.

I pretty much ignore ads (google or not), but just a few weeks ago a google ad popped up that introduced a brilliant possible solution I didn't realize was out there to something that was/is troubling me deeply. The ad connected me to a concept that was very freeing, and it brought a potential force of light into a situation that was starting to seem impossible. Really weird that it would come through a google ad, but it did.

I will see how it plays out but you never know when, out of all the junk, an ad might actually connect a person to something surprisingly helpful - involving real people and the real world too.

So... I just want to say that this is a nice suggestion. At least, trying to think of a way to be helpful to everyone.

[Agota]

Not so long ago, Cado volunteered to become a mod here. With his g/f Mariana Trench poised to become forum admin, I think the two of them were looking forward to being the effective king and queen of the forums here. I was neutral on Cado since I didn't know him well, but I followed our usual procedure of running him by the mod team. They quickly voted him down. He asked me to reconsider, but I wasn't going to overrule the decision of the mod team. He gave me the impression he'd wait for Mariana to become admin and then try again, perhaps assuming that she could just make him a mod..

I can't talk for Cado and Marianna, but I can talk for myself and..

Steve, you can't really be serious with this, can you? Cado and Marianna making a conspiracy in order to rule these forums? Um, what? Do you seriously believe this? Honestly, how do you even come up with these conspiracy theories involving people who have done a lot for this community, especially when your theories are clearly out of match with the character these people have shown here in these forums?

I believe it's safe to say that all of us has something to be grateful for to you, because most of us benefited a lot from your content over the years, as well as from this community which was started by you. Many connections that were made here turned into friendships and even into happy romantic relationships. I also believe that many connections that are still weak at the moment will turn into a lot more few years down the road. It only happened because you've started your blog and consequently this community. I'm grateful for that and I believe that most forum members and ex-members are, even the ones who are really emotional over this.

All that being said, you've hurt a lot of people over last few days, people who care about each other:

Many people who you've accused with participating in some sort of conspiracy against you and these forums have been active and valuable members of this community for years. It probably doesn't seem that way to you, but to most people, me included, these accusations seem ridiculous. I mean, it's not new members who you don't know at all we're talking about. You know these people for years. Is it really surprising that people feel hurt when absurd accusations are thrown at them by someone like you? And is it really surprising that others who observe this happening are not impressed by your behavior?

We also have mods involved in this. I can't speak for them since I never was one, but from what I've seen, they all were really decent people who were dedicated to this community. They, combined with active members, were the ones who kept the community that you've started together, devoting a lot of their time and energy to it. I don't know how they feel about this all, but if I were a mod here and would be publicly accused with something like that and then banned, I would take it as an insult, because it's really a slap in their face. I don't appreciate behavior like this and many people doesn't, especially when people we're talking about are they friends.

Another thing is that you are banning people left and right now. Unless most active members who were banned have multiple personalities disorder, I can hardly imagine them trolling someone here. I don't know what messages got deleted, but to many people, including me, it seems that you're banning everyone who disagree with your recent behavior and speaks their minds about it. I think that many events that you perceive as personal attacks are not personal attacks at all in eyes to most people.

Steve, obviously, it's your forum, so you can do anything you want with it and in it, no matter how selfish or disrespectful to others it would be, but don't be surprised then that people are not impressed by it at all and speak their mind about it, many times in not the most respectful manner possible.

With all due respect, your behaviour over the last few days does seem completely irrational, disrespectful and selfish. I don't have any idea what's going on through your mind. I'm really surprised to see this kind of behavior from you.

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Agota

I don't have any idea what's going on through your mind. I'm really surprised to see this kind of behavior from you.

Other's reactions, including yours, aren't a surprise to me.

My behavior is a surprise to you and others though. Some are attributing it to emotionalism and irrationality, which is understandable, but those who know me well know that this is too much of a stretch.

So what logical conclusion might you draw from this?

I must be doing this on purpose.

The missing piece is that I haven't shared what that purpose is. Well, I have in a way -- it's no secret that my purpose is to live consciously and to help others do the same. But I haven't yet shared how that applies to this situation, and it isn't obvious. I will share the full story eventually though, after the forum shutdown is complete.

In the meantime, crazy as it may sound, I'm deliberately making it easy for people to focus their pent-up anger upon me as we go through this transition.

Dr. Wayne Dyer says that when you squeeze an orange, you get orange juice. Why? Because that's what's inside.

In this case I'm juicing negative emotions because we need to squeeze those out first before we can be ready for the next step. We have to bring all of that up to conscious awareness. As we're obviously seeing, there were a lot of repressed emotions here that are now being juiced out. If there was no anger inside a person, then juicing has no effect -- worst case it just tickles a bit.

[straysweeper]

Originally Posted by Savage

Dr. Wayne Dyer says that when you squeeze an orange, you get orange juice. Why? Because that's what's inside.

In this case I'm juicing negative emotions because we need to squeeze those out first before we can be ready for the next step. We have to bring all of that up to conscious awareness. As we're obviously seeing, there were a lot of repressed emotions here that are now being juiced out. If there was no anger inside a person, then juicing has no effect -- worst case it just tickles a bit.

My ego thanks you for more food for thought : )

[freddy]

Originally Posted by Savage

Other's reactions, including yours, aren't a surprise to me.

My behavior is a surprise to you and others though. Some are attributing it to emotionalism and irrationality, which is understandable, but those who know me well know that this is too much of a stretch.

So what logical conclusion might you draw from this?

I must be doing this on purpose.

The missing piece is that I haven't shared what that purpose is. Well, I have in a way -- it's no secret that my purpose is to live consciously and to help others do the same. But I haven't yet shared how that applies to this situation, and it isn't obvious. I will share the full story eventually though, after the forum shutdown is complete.

In the meantime, crazy as it may sound, I'm deliberately making it easy for people to focus their pent-up anger upon me as we go through this transition.

Dr. Wayne Dyer says that when you squeeze an orange, you get orange juice. Why? Because that's what's inside.

In this case I'm juicing negative emotions because we need to squeeze those out first before we can be ready for the next step. We have to bring all of that up to conscious awareness. As we're obviously seeing, there were a lot of repressed emotions here that are now being juiced out. If there was no anger inside a person, then juicing has no effect -- worst case it just tickles a bit.

Well I knew there had to be something comming better than this. This is so cool. I thought with all the giving and caring of your articles and post. You would'nt leave so many feeling hurting.
Instead of singing "Your a mean one, Mister Steve" for a Christmas songs. I'll be singing "Your a sly one Mister Master Steve".

[cassiopeia]

Although it's sad to see the forums go, I love reading all these posts about how much people's lives have been changed by this community.

Blessings to you all.

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by Savage

In this case I'm juicing negative emotions because we need to squeeze those out first before we can be ready for the next step. We have to bring all of that up to conscious awareness. As we're obviously seeing, there were a lot of repressed emotions here that are now being juiced out. If there was no anger inside a person, then juicing has no effect -- worst case it just tickles a bit.

Now that's interesting, since I, for one, have been feeling a kind of freedom to write things here that I have felt all these years, but never felt free to voice before. It feels good to get it out in the open and have this opportunity to separate myself from a certain kind of people now and gravitate more towards people that I am compatible with. There was quite a mixture of people on these forums - and I was not very compatible with the ones dominating the place.

[Harmonium]

Originally Posted by Savage

Other's reactions, including yours, aren't a surprise to me.

My behavior is a surprise to you and others though. Some are attributing it to emotionalism and irrationality, which is understandable, but those who know me well know that this is too much of a stretch.

So what logical conclusion might you draw from this?

I must be doing this on purpose.

The missing piece is that I haven't shared what that purpose is. Well, I have in a way -- it's no secret that my purpose is to live consciously and to help others do the same. But I haven't yet shared how that applies to this situation, and it isn't obvious. I will share the full story eventually though, after the forum shutdown is complete.

In the meantime, crazy as it may sound, I'm deliberately making it easy for people to focus their pent-up anger upon me as we go through this transition.

Dr. Wayne Dyer says that when you squeeze an orange, you get orange juice. Why? Because that's what's inside.

In this case I'm juicing negative emotions because we need to squeeze those out first before we can be ready for the next step. We have to bring all of that up to conscious awareness. As we're obviously seeing, there were a lot of repressed emotions here that are now being juiced out. If there was no anger inside a person, then juicing has no effect -- worst case it just tickles a bit.

Lightworker, or sociopath, lightworker, or sociopath

XD


a sociolightopath!


I really do wonder though if these gurus develop a somewhat similar, more positive trait than sociopathy. Do you mind if I try on your consciousness Steve? It should only tickle a little

[Mounds]

Originally Posted by Bliss Sage

Now that's interesting, since I, for one, have been feeling a kind of freedom to write things here that I have felt all these years, but never felt free to voice before. It feels good to get it out in the open and have this opportunity to separate myself from a certain kind of people now and gravitate more towards people that I am compatible with. There was quite a mixture of people on these forums - and I was not very compatible with the ones dominating the place.

I'm just gonna go ahead and throw this out there: there was never anyone dominating this place.

I've had A LOT of dissenting opinions directed at me in my time of posting and many of them came from active members. All that really meant to me was that they had a different opinion.

And how does someone dominate the forum anyway? What's the criteria there...?

Is it...

... a bigger friends list?
... a higher post count?
... more people agreeing with the other person?
... being a mod vs a regular member?
... having a bigger rep bar?

Maybe we can still explore that if you're interested.

-Tim

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Mounds

And how does someone dominate the forum anyway? What's the criteria there...?

As anyone can calculate from the stats at the bottom of the forum home page, the average registered member here has made 21 posts total. This doesn't count lurkers, just people who actually registered, and there isn't much reason to register unless you want to post.

Our top poster Angela posted 22,520 times, which is 1061 times more often than the average member. And we have many members who post 100-500 times more often than the average member. Individually the voices of our average members can be easily drowned out.

Now if we look at the top 50 or so posters here and add up all their post counts, we can see how easy it is for a small group to dominate a seemingly large forum.

Even 100 average members would still be collectively outposted by the top poster by more than 10 to 1.

You can count me among this group if you'd like, but I think it's easy to see why I'd have a large post count on my own site as the main admin and given that all my blog posts are discussed here. Even so, the top poster outposted me here 3.75 to 1, and many others easily outpost me as well.

So the math suggests it's not that difficult for a small group to dominate a forum like this, assuming they're willing to invest a few hours per day here as many of them did.

[Sbonn]

Originally Posted by Bliss Sage

Now that's interesting, since I, for one, have been feeling a kind of freedom to write things here that I have felt all these years, but never felt free to voice before. It feels good to get it out in the open and have this opportunity to separate myself from a certain kind of people now and gravitate more towards people that I am compatible with. There was quite a mixture of people on these forums - and I was not very compatible with the ones dominating the place.

Agree with big time here Bliss, big time.. and the other night I did digress but dog gone it.. it felt good to finally tell one person who bugged me off .. in the most politically correct fashion I could muster.. and just watch that person demonstrate / reinforce why I didn't have much appreciation for them.

There are a couple of others too... what I also observed is some mods tended to be supportive of some of the stronger personalities, while I do feel it is good to speak your mind, there is a way to do it where it is not offensive.. some did not seem to grasp that too well.

BIG HUGS

[asombro]

Sad to see this forum end but glad that the posts will remain as a read-only archive as you mention in your blog. Let us know how we can access the archives and the features of that and if you will only leave them up for a limited time.

[Focus Driblet]

Originally Posted by Mounds

I'm just gonna go ahead and throw this out there: there was never anyone dominating this place.

I've had A LOT of dissenting opinions directed at me in my time of posting and many of them came from active members. All that really meant to me was that they had a different opinion.

And how does someone dominate the forum anyway? What's the criteria there...?

Is it...

... a bigger friends list?
... a higher post count?
... more people agreeing with the other person?
... being a mod vs a regular member?
... having a bigger rep bar?

Maybe we can still explore that if you're interested.

-Tim

I'd say, being reasonably active, having strong opinions, being informed enough to be able to defend those opinions, and those opinions being shared by a reasonable amount of other active and 'prolific' (noticable) members who can boost them when they voice their opinions by backing them up (the most classic since mid-2010 being: "I wish I could rep you!! <3 <3"). <-- if one has all of those.

I think there were few domineering members (of those who made a big impact) lately. Well, many could be aggressive but most were reasonable.

[danas]

I just find it weird and amusing that all the recently banned members have the most rep as well.
I think that in itself says a lot.

So its like:
Angela BANNED has a reputation beyond repute
James81 BANNED has a reputation beyond repute
Acting Like Godot BANNED has a reputation beyond repute
Ssandra BANNED is an amazing contributor

etc....

Id like to thank everyone, and especially all the recently banned members for contributing so much of their time and effort and care on this site.
Even though Im one of the oldest members, I hardly contributed that much at all, but yet I gained so much....

By the way- Why was James81 banned? Did I miss something....

Anyway Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

I am so grateful to you all

Steve -I am so so grateful, I dont agree at all with how you reacted to all this, but you're just human and in the process of growing just like the rest of us, and I love you.

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by Sbonn

what I also observed is some mods tended to be supportive of some of the stronger personalities

Exactly, yes.

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by Mounds

And how does someone dominate the forum anyway? What's the criteria there...?

Is it...

... a bigger friends list?
... a higher post count?
... more people agreeing with the other person?
... being a mod vs a regular member?
... having a bigger rep bar?

Maybe we can still explore that if you're interested.

-Tim

Not interested. I was talking about the atmosphere that was created, which was a result of the dominant personalities on the site. I'm not using numbers or a measurable criterion; it's called feeling. Everything has a feeling to it, whether you are sensitive enough to feel it or not. Feeling can usually be backed up with facts, which Steve has done.

[Beingist]

Originally Posted by danas

By the way- Why was James81 banned? Did I miss something....

James got banned for intentionally pushing buttons in a thread discussing menstrual cups. The thread was ultimately split, and treated of the idea that talking about menstruation was disgusting, but James continued to intentionally and unapologetically push buttons, until the mods finally banned him. The decision was, apparently, preceded by a directive from Steve to be more considerate of the more sensitive posters of the forum, who were having their buttons pushed intentionally by those like James.

Reefs was also banned after this directive.

[Beingist]

Originally Posted by Bliss Sage

Not interested. I was talking about the atmosphere that was created, which was a result of the dominant personalities on the site. I'm not using numbers or a measurable criterion; it's called feeling. Everything has a feeling to it, whether you are sensitive enough to feel it or not. Feeling can usually be backed up with facts, which Steve has done.

It's a sort of "groupthink", from my perspective, which creates an environment about which you speak, Blissy. I sensed it, too, but I consider stuff like that a challenge to transcend, which is why I've hung around.

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by Beingist

Blissy.

that's cute.

Originally Posted by Beingist

I sensed it, too, but I consider stuff like that a challenge to transcend, which is why I've hung around.

I've hung around too, since 2006. But I began shy and I never came out of my shell on here, because I was feeling like I had to constantly defend or explain myself to people who misjudged me or didn't read my posts carefully or simply had no compassion and in the last months I withdrew almost entirely from direct interactions (at least I exercised strict control over my posts to ensure that I avoided an experience I didn't want)

Concerning transcending...Often people will come to a forum in a vulnerable state because they have found they need help or don't know how to transcend or help themselves out of a serious situation in their real life. I never could relate to that, especially those who would come on saying they were suicidal. I've been suicidal and when I was, the last thing I would ever do would be to go onto a forum to discuss it. But if people do that, if they are reaching for help and think they can get help that way, then...it seems quite awful and cruel to attack someone who is already about as low as a person can possibly ever get in life.

When someone is that low, you don't talk about transcending--well, you can, but it would be as useful as throwing a life preserver to a drowning person with no arms. And if you start regurgitating the usual "100% responsibility" or "being at cause" stuff which became the hallmark of this forum, you might as well just push the drowning guy under. That just gives them more fodder for self-pity and guilt. It's just their state of mind.

The decision was, apparently, preceded by a directive from Steve to be more considerate of the more sensitive posters of the forum

Really?
See how Steve has changed since 2006
No wonder they left to make their own private forum; they must not have liked being forced to be considerate. That's good now, though, we can all separate and be with the kind of people we like.