Help needed for a very personal difficult situation

[KALV81]

Ok so here it is. I read your articles that someone on oprahs website posted and thought maybe this could help me since there isnt anyone I can talk to about this. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years. In tthat 3 years we have gone threw a tremendous amounts of difficult times. It all started with his mother. His family grew up with a lot of money an I can see now that his entire family is very very spoiled and selfish. They dont help anyone at all and they dont give people chances. After meeting his parents for the 4th time my boyfriends mom told him to never bring me around again. For no apparent reason. Since then she has constantly making negative comments about me. Telling my boyfriend that I will destroy his future and that im useless and that im no good for him. She barely knows me and she some how thinks im that bad of a person to do that. The other day she asked my boyfriend what it will take for him to realize Im no good to him. Luckily he told her when im no longer beneficial to him. But that to me means she is trying to find ways to break us up. One year for christmas I thought I would put my difference aside and buy her a 40 dollar box of her favorite chocolates and all she did was give them back to my boyfriend to give back to me to return them. So my question is how do you deal with an "in law" that is ungrateful, selfish, and so against your relationship she will do anything to destroy it? Im not even allowed to go to their families christmas party which by the way her brother holds not her. Now her brother and her mother want to meet me but she thinks im a disgrace. So how do you handle someone that is so negative so against you because you dont have loads of money and you didnt go to college and get a degree? Please help me with this if at all possible!

[VetTechJess]

I would recommend susan forwards book "Toxic In-Laws"

it has a real help in what to say and do for those obnoxious in laws that would just as soon see the end of creation than actually have something good happen to one of their own children.....

[Love]

Wow... that sounds like tough. Not gelling with the in-laws. It sounds like you're unhappy. I'm not sure what to do. I feel that the action (actually, reaction) that would be most satisfying is telling her off to her face. But somehow, I don't think that's the answer you're looking for

[Max Power]

Originally Posted by KALV81

Luckily he told her when im no longer beneficial to him.

That's a key line. So when you are of no more value to your boyfriend, he'll dump you?? That doesn't sound very loving. If your boyfriend really cares about you, he's going to have to make a choice, who would he choose? You or his Mom??

Sounds like he's choosing his Mom and having you as a side dish. Ask him to start standing up for you, if he won't, he's already made his choice right? If he's the right one for you, he'll stand up and fight for the relationship, letting his mother treat you like dirt means he's doing the same.

Power to the Max