Putting a Brick in My Mailbox (Blog)

[Savage]

Use this thread to discuss the following entry from Steve Pavlina's blog:

Putting a Brick in My Mailbox

[Weena]

Lovely post. I liked the travel bit (living where i live i certainly have experienced what 13 hours drive in a day feels like). The second bit was nice too, but does not apply to me .

So, yeah, if you love long drives and seeing amazing scenery, maybe someday visit Australia... And it's good to know you're good at avoiding killing wildlife because in this country i think you'd count dead things in thousands per year .

[mikej]

sounds like a good idea to me. "hack away at the unessential" as bruce lee once said.

[Elfwing]

Amazing idea. As somebody who gets really overwhelmed by just ten emails, I guarantee your life is going to be so much more peaceful from now on!

[Cochonette]

I have always been big on online connections, had more close friends online than offline. It started out that way because I come from a small town and didn't like any of the people there when I was growing up, so I could only find friendship online. But I have been living in the city since I left for college more than three years ago, and last year I developed more close friendships and connected with more people than ever before on a deep level, both online and offline. I increased my confidence in my ability to establish offline relationships. So then I slowly started to realize that it's time I worked on developing my offline connections, and that's what I am working on now. I increasingly feel like not engaging my online friends so much, not expressing things online as just a way to take the energy away from dealing with things in person, and making growth there. So I feel you on preferring to make the face-to-face connections. I still value my online friendships, and I really value the placeless quality of them because they're never so lost, but I don't like the restrictions that come with them.

[Curtis2011]

Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina

So if you’re reading this website, and you feel the urge to contact me with your feedback, question, proposal, etc., don’t do it.

*silence*

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Curtis2011

*silence*

OMG... finally!

Take me now, Lord. My life is complete.

[James81]

Oh man, why'd you have to go and do that, Steve? You realize that a large portion of those people are going to come HERE now, right?

I get the intuitive feeling that you're moving away from online ventures more and more. I wonder what'll become of this site as you become more and more disconnected from online ventures?

[puguglypress]

It'll mostly just be bands posting updates about their upcoming shows.

[Andreas]

You know Steve, that's a pretty elaborate excuse just to free up some space on your site's navigation bar. I've been seein' that thing fill up for a while now, and for about the past year you've had it filled to the brim!

So good call removing that "Contact" link. With it gone, the navbar looks much better now. I'm coming at this from a designer's point of view though, so I don't expect that many people to notice though.

But seriously,

I actually agree with you, Steve. I can't even begin imagine how many emails you must get a day at this point, and I'm surprised you didn't do something like this sooner. Good on ya, mate.

Kinda surprised you removed the PO Box as well though.
You don't want even want mail from people like Eben Pagan?
But maybe I shouldn't be surprised.

This is Phase 1, isn't it?

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Andreas

Kinda surprised you removed the PO Box as well though.

I removed the mailing address because it's mainly used by publicists to send me books and DVDs unsolicited, ostensibly in the hope that I'll review them on my website. That was cool for about a year, after which it became more trouble than it was worth to deal with the clutter. I'd rather read books on my iPad anyway.

Some people also use it to send me business proposals, which I don't need to read either.

So I'm bricking up the PO box too. Most likely I won't bother to renew it once the current paid-up term runs out.

Incidentally, I got the brick-in-the-mailbox analogy from an old Seinfeld episode where Kramer tries to opt out of receiving postal mail by putting a brick in his mailbox, so new mail can't be delivered. At the end of the episode, he gets kidnapped and taken to the Postmaster General, who gives him a stern talking too, and Kramer capitulates and agrees to accept mail again.

[Zach M]

Glad you had a great road trip, and got to visit so many great places.

would you rather be smooching someone beside a beautiful waterfall?

Best line here. Actually I'd rather be smooching someone behind a waterfall. I've got the place in mind. Just looking for the girl.

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Zach Matley

Best line here. Actually I'd rather be smooching someone behind a waterfall. I've got the place in mind. Just looking for the girl.

You can do that at Niagara Falls if you go to the tunnels behind the horseshoe falls (Canadian side). It's not a particularly romantic location though -- damp and noisy and probably crowded.

[Zach M]

Hehe. "My" waterfall is smaller and more out-of-the-way. It takes a little bit of swimming to get behind the cascade, and the space behind is the perfect size for two people. Being in NorCal, it's hella romantic.

[ssandra]

I cannot blame you if you get mails like these

If you do this in an email, I hate you - The Oatmeal

Looking forward to meeting and connecting in person in a few weeks!

[cacheborn]

Cannot believe that I did not get the Seinfeld analogy. AAAgggrrh!

I have been having these thoughts that AFK life is much better and richer. Good to see them reflected and articulated. There has been too much talk already about how the multitasking between different browsing, emailing, facebooking, writing a report is using our brains in a way that they were not meant to be used. Then I came across Paul Graham's article about how to procrastinate (a good read). And now I read this post. The similarities are too glaring.

Since I started practicing Ho'oponopono, I am encountering more and more reflections of my own thoughts elsewhere. Many times, they are still at subconscious level in me, but then I see them much better articulated somewhere else and that boosts my thought process.

Thanks for the post. I hope you have many more exciting travels across all the continents, Steve.

[cacheborn]

Originally Posted by ssandra

If you do this in an email, I hate you - The Oatmeal

Loved that comic, Sandra.

[Savage]

Originally Posted by ssandra

I cannot blame you if you get mails like these

If you do this in an email, I hate you - The Oatmeal

Looking forward to meeting and connecting in person in a few weeks!

My emails look something like this:

"I bought Dweep in 2002, but my hard drive crashed and I lost the game. Please send me the download link again. My grandson really wants to play."

---

"i thnk my b/f is cheeting on me cuz he sez im fat. plz hlp asap."

Sent from my iPhone

---

"I know your time is valuable, so I'll be as brief as I can and get to the point. But first I need to explain my situation, so you'll understand where I'm coming from.

<3000 words of complaining about life with his/her parents>

So how do you think I should deal with my Mom? I mean I guess I could move out and get a job or something, but I'm scared about that. And I don't think I'd want to work at Starbucks."

---

"I'm doing a school project, and after reading your blog posts on the subject, I've decided to do it on the topic of polyphasic sleep. I need to interview you about it, so please call me ASAP. My number is 555-555-5555. But first give me a couple days to get the questions ready for you."

---

"Author X is coming out with a new book this week, so we'd like to get your address so we can send you a free copy in exchange for a review on your website. I've pasted the press release below."

---

"Thank you so much. Reading your blog has truly changed my life. <insert life story>"

---

"I'm 18, and I have a business idea that I'm sure is going to be a huge success. Please download and sign this 6-page NDA, and fax it back to me, so we can discuss it. I'm sure you'll want to help us once you hear the idea. This is going to be huge."

---

"I just launched a new blog at URL. Please take a look at it and tell me what you think. I want my site to be as successful as yours by the end of the year."

---

"You are going to hell for cheating on your wife. <insert 2000+ words about God and Jesus>"

Sent from my iPhone

---

I wish I was exaggerating.

I think I'm starting to fall in love with the brick.

[Andreas]

Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina

Incidentally, I got the brick-in-the-mailbox analogy from an old Seinfeld episode where Kramer tries to opt out of receiving postal mail by putting a brick in his mailbox, so new mail can't be delivered. At the end of the episode, he gets kidnapped and taken to the Postmaster General, who gives him a stern talking too, and Kramer capitulates and agrees to accept mail again.

Oh yes, I remember that episode. Good memory.

So does this mean you'll be avoiding postmen, as well?


Because the mail never stops. Every day it piles up more and more, but the more you get out, the more it keeps coming. And then the bar code reader breaks. And then it's Publisher's Clearinghouse day...

I see your point about email, and thanks for that interesting (though I must admit not entirely surprising) window into your email experience. I completely see what you mean about loving the brick!

But that doesn't mean you need to kill off snail mail... or does it? I thought perhaps there was something in the back of your mind, some thought considering the possibility that you're closing yourself off from opportunities, but perhaps the amount of concern you have about that is down to: None At All.

Have your values experienced such a profound shift in the last few months that you honestly don't see the value in any unexpected contact besides face to face, anymore?

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Andreas

But isn't there something in the back of your mind, some thought considering that possibility that you're closing yourself off from opportunities? Or have your values experienced such a profound shift in the last few months that you honestly don't see the value in any unexpected contact besides face to face, anymore?

That used to be a big concern. But I feel that my best opportunities come from within. Second best come from people I already know. The stuff that comes via the Internet from people I don't already know is almost always too much of a mismatch to seriously consider. I think by closing the door on the outside junk, I'll be able to concentrate better on my own ideas.

I'm also curious to see how this works out. I suspect that my opportunities are more likely to expand due to increased focus and fewer distractions.

[JoePike]

Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina

I'm wrong about everything you need me to be wrong about... until you're ready for me to be right.

Son of a gun... Every post Steve ever wrote summed up in one sentence.

[Sonnenblume]

Reminded me of Donald Knuth: "I have been a happy man ever since January 1, 1990, when I no longer had an email address. I'd used email since about 1975, and it seems to me that 15 years of email is plenty for one lifetime."

`I don't even have an e-mail address. I have reached an age where my main purpose is not to receive messages.' --- Umberto Eco, quoted in the New Yorker

Knuth versus Email

Good idea, Steve.

[richardxthripp]

Get a wood-burning stove to deal with junk mail and heat your house at the same time. The only problem is plastic... so many letters have plastic cards in them or other junk you don't want to burn.

[escapeplan]

This site targets the needy by way of its subject content. Whether it was the intention of this site to target these sort of people back in 2004 is something I wouldn't like to speculate on, but the amount of needy mail Steve gets is hardly surprising.

I see a niche market here for a PD site for people a little higher up societies food chain. In other words for those who still want to grow, but have outgrown this site. Steve's frustration is someone else's golden opportunity.

[Rachelle]

Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina

I think I'm starting to fall in love with the brick.

Oooh! Perhaps you and I can hook up with the brick and have a threesome all whilst professing our love and gratitude to/for each other. Then the three of us can go to Paris and make out.

Hee hee.

[Marth]

Good points & this is a powerful theme, just look at what's happening to the net it's turning into a big time vacuum with distractions such as twitter, facebook, youtube, email and more.

our character shines by what we resist!

[supertom]

I also get annoying e-mails. Some guy keeps telling me to sign up to his workshops saying that its probably gonna be the last one ever, than recommends bunch of products, than theres a small article about how you need to be smart about your life.

[ellie]

This post was actually really helpful for me, in sorting some issues I have with starting an online business, mainly people requesting help/advice on email and social media. I of course don't have that many requests coming into email box, but when they do, it's hard enough for me to keep up with them and it seems like quite a time wasting exercise. Or it seems rather superficial. I don't know there really is something said, for meeting people in person, rather than online.

I recently finished reading "Eat, Pray, Love" which really got me to re-evaluate how I explore life, and got me to question what is important. I think getting out and smelling the roses is pretty important now. I did make a pact with myself, to visit new towns within my state each week. Not sure being stuck behind a computer 24/7 is going to be my thing. I think I would be better getting out and about and meeting clients, meeting people face-to-face etc

[stewartM]

Originally Posted by escapeplan

This site targets the needy by way of its subject content.

confirmation bias much?

[munish]

Originally Posted by steve pavlina

my emails look something like this:

<3000 words of complaining about life with his/her parents>
and i don't think i'd want to work at starbucks."