5 Wealth Lessons From 20 Percent of a Millionaire (Blog)

[Savage]

Use this thread to discuss the following entry from Steve Pavlina's blog:

5 Wealth Lessons From 20 Percent of a Millionaire

[TechnoGuyRob]

Thanks, Steve! Good article!

[Kristoffer]

OK, to be a millionaire you wanna keep a lot of cash in your wallet and not worry about spending money. So far so good.

But, the rich people I know hold on very tightly to their money. They don't buy things all over the place, because that is how they got rich in the first place!

I understand the idea of behaving like your rich and thereby manifesting the vibes of a rich person. This eventually becomes self fulfilling and, bang, you are a millionaire!

The trick is to keep this in balance. How is that done? I want to get in to the details of this thing. Anybody got any ideas?

[wermejbmmelo]

I think every aspect of life should be in balance. Try not to make one thing your complete focus, because when you want something, and always think about it, you push it away. You have to send out your intention, and then let it go. But still be open to when opportunity knocks. Pay attention. Steve and Erin have discussed this, along with synchronicities. You can take any topic they've discussed, and turn it towards whatever you are dealing with at the moment.

But, I did reply to this thread to discuss the financial trolls. The trolls, in general, reminded me of the Dark Entities that Sylvia Browne talked about in her books. Again, we let them go, just as we let our "wants" go. Give it to the universe to handle, so you can spend your energy in more beneficial ways.

[Alban]

Hey I liked the description of the trolls in this article. I had never heard this definition before and it made me smile because that's so true, everyone has to deal with 'trolls' in life. Especially the people who dare to think differently I guess. I just never put a name and an exact definition on the 'trolls' before.

My attitude about them is to say to myself : "ok, just have compassion, love them without condition, but don't EVER let them influence you. Live your life and don't care AT ALL about what they think."

[ÜberDan]

Another great post. I'm very interested in growing my financial wealth and had heard most of the first part of the article before although it's always good to hear it again. The second half was new to me and I’ll be using those techniques to deal with financial trolls. Very similar to a book called Taming your Gremlin.

wermejbmmelo:

I think every aspect of life should be in balance. Try not to make one thing your complete focus, because when you want something, and always think about it, you push it away. You have to send out your intention, and then let it go

I like your comment. I've heard that wanting something to much pushes it away, how does that work? How does it compare with having a burning desire for something? My initial thought would be that wanting is a feeling of scarcity, but where does desire fit in? I have a large commitment and focus to my finances and often feel I'm projecting maybe too much want and am so intrigued by what you say.

All the best,

Dan

[Cron]

Originally Posted by Alban

Hey I liked the description of the trolls in this article. I had never heard this definition before

Trolls are attention seekers.

The best thing ( for them and you ) is simply to not respond to them.

1. It saves you time.

2. It saves you from being upset.

3. It discourages them from more trolling, which helps them move on and
get a life.

People usually object to this approach because not everyone does it so "it doesn't work". Well, if you do it #1 & #2 will work for you.

Other people feel compelled because the troll might convince someone of something that is not true. Hardly. Silence on the internet doesn't necessarily mean agreement and most people can see through BS themselves.

I think people who use this excuse to continue feeding the trolls suffer from a similar problem as the trolls --- not having anything better to do ---which is usually the result of not having the courage to pursue things they want.

[Cron]

I read your blog post Steve.

In regards to people accusing you of exploiting others I don't think that is the case. I don't agree with every last thing you believe in, but I can tell, most of the time, when someone is just out for cash. There are people like that on this forum, but I don't think you are one of them.

I have gotten a lot of use out of your material....all of which I have read for free. I haven't had to buy a CD set or pay for a dowloadable pdf.

[jkmuller]

I just wanted to point out this quote from the article:

Perhaps you can earn a million dollars by using emotional manipulation to sell people useless, overpriced information products, but assuming you’re not a scam artist, you’re going to have to earn the money by providing a million dollars worth of real value.

I have heard Steve discuss earning money is terms of "creating value" before, but this quote really made sense to me. I really like the idea of focusing on creating value rather than making money. The latter seems like it encourages things such as scams and tricks to get people to buy things. Creating value seems like a win-win situation for everyone.

On the other hand, I'm not sure I really understand the whole concept of spending more money leading to making more money. Certainly, there are tons of people already who spend way above their income and they aren't getting any richer. I'm sure some of those people even believe that they are rich but in reality they are deep into debt. When I look at some of the wealthy people I admire, such as Warren Buffett and see how they are incredibly wealthy yet don't spend their money foolishly (OK, except the private jet!) I question the sense of the idea.

I also think that its important for anyone that wants to be rich to change how they think about money, but is spending more really the best way? There really is a difference between a $20 and $50 dinner, regardless of what you believe. The difference is that $30 not spent on dinner could be used in other, possibly more constructive ways such as making a loan to a developing-world entrepreneur. Not that people shouldn't be going out to dinner, I don't think that. But is the belief that "there’s no financial difference whatsoever between a $20 dinner and a $50 dinner" really wise?

[wermejbmmelo]

Dan, I think it's great to have a burning desire for something, as long as you go for it in a positive way, and it's more beneficial to you and others, and wouldn't hurt you or others. Like, I have a burning desire for chocolate cake, but too often, and in too large quantities, it wouldn't be good for my health or for my kids, in that I'm their role model. I also have a conflicting burning desire, to be thin, which can't happen if I focus too much on eating chocolate cake. lol, you know what I mean? A burning desire will motivate you, but like Steve has said in prior blogs, you have to choose, not want, and intend for it. It's wording, and wording helps you psychologically. It's ok to have preferences, just work with what you have. If you have the talent and motivation, work with them, and then notice the synchronicities coming your way. Notice that what you wanted is coming to you. Don't dwell on how fast you're not getting it, or what form it's coming in. That's focusing on thinking you don't have what you desire. Instead, focus on knowing it's coming, and already is in bits and pieces. And use Steve's suggestions for keeping it coming. It's all attitude. JM2C.

Steve, I have to add about giving to charities, that I throw whatever I can to them whenever I have extra. To me, right now, I nickel and dime things, because I see them in material terms. I mean, when I use coupons at the supermarket, or look for specials, etc, I can save $30 on occasion, and that adds up at the end of the year. That goes towards other things like dinner out for us, or museum admission for us, or towards another bill, etc. I always see money as going towards one thing or another. I can't see paying $200 on shoes, when I can get them for $20 (unless I can wear better quality ones for 10x as long.) But I won't drive to 10 different supermarkets to save a dime, and I won't go to a far gas station to save 40 cents. That to me is a waste of time. My mom scrimped all her life, and stretched my dad's check and they never seemed unhappy. Money was there when they needed it. And now, years later, when we kids ask them for something, they are generous. That's how I was taught. I am caught up in that now. I can't work full time until my youngest goes to school full time. My husband's check is the only stable finance we have. It has to be stretched. I cannot commit to $1k charity donation. I think women are caught up in this economy. When you talk about what we can do to become millionaires, I always think it refers to men. But I look how Erin is managing, and I look at your blogs, and it motivates me. I'm trying my best to get some work from multiple sources, things I can do at home, or when I can get babysitting.
How about either of you writing some blogs for stay at home moms?

[youcould2]

Back to trolls for a minute ....

How do you deal with a troll that is (1) your mother-in-law (2) at an age where change is not likely (3) already chooses to ignore you ..

I put a smiley in there but it really isn't funny.

Shanti,

Ron

[Michelle]

Originally Posted by youcould2

Back to trolls for a minute ....

How do you deal with a troll that is (1) your mother-in-law (2) at an age where change is not likely (3) already chooses to ignore you ..

I put a smiley in there but it really isn't funny.

Shanti,

Ron

Trolls are trolls. Stomp on her like the rest. Cut her out. No exceptions even for family.

[Savage]

Originally Posted by youcould2

How do you deal with a troll that is (1) your mother-in-law (2) at an age where change is not likely (3) already chooses to ignore you ..

Moving 300 miles away works pretty well.

Seriously though if you have an in-law problem, then it's really up to your spouse to enforce those boundaries, especially if your spouse is the door through which trolls are entering.

[SuccessPundit]

For me, the biggest influence has been surrounding myself with other wealthy people. To achieve a net worth of $1 million, deliberately reduce the time you spend with people that have a net worth below $1 million and deliberately increased the number of people with a net worth over $1 million. You'll notice several interesting changes:

1) After listening to them talking about $10 million and up business transactions, $1 million won't seem like so much money.

2) As you become an accepted member of the group, you'll start to think of yourself as "one of them," slowly transforming your identity from someone trying to become a millionaire to someone that is a millionaire.

3) Simply by hanging around them, you'll be exposed to more opportunities that can make you a millionaire.

The same holds for making any amount of money. I'm working on achieving a net worth of $10 million now, and to do that, I'm surrounding myself with people that are making $100 million or more. Just in the last 60 days, they've involved me in two real estate deals that should make me $10 million over the next three years. So, I'm well on my way.

[Savage]

Originally Posted by SuccessPundit

For me, the biggest influence has been surrounding myself with other wealthy people. To achieve a net worth of $1 million, deliberately reduce the time you spend with people that have a net worth below $1 million and deliberately increased the number of people with a net worth over $1 million.

Definitely. This works not just with money but with any growth area like fitness, relationships, time management, etc.

Over the past few months, I've been spending more time with millionaires, both in person and on the phone. I realized that things that seem big to me are matter of course for them. This helps raise my standards by osmosis. One of them even asked me, "Why are you thinking so small?" That got to me because I'd thought I was thinking fairly big, but to the other person it was small by comparison.

[Scott Lipton]

Excellent article Steve. Your stuff really helps grease the wheels when bumpy roads come along. The part about trolls really brought to light several ongoing situations that were just draining my energy and had no real purpose. It seemed very similar to Brian Tracy's "zero-based thinking", except more specifically with certain people. Sometimes, there are just toxic people out there that you simply can't argue with.

The section about keeping $300 in your wallet was also an eye-opener. You see, I already do such "stocking up" operations as buying all of the toothpaste, trash bags, paper towels, etc. I will need for a year at the beginning of each year in order to save on mental RAM. However, I hadn't before thought of saving time on ATM trips by carrying more than just $50 or so in my wallet at a time. As I see it, the only reason not to carry around $200-$300 at a time is that you think there's a chance your wallet is going to be stolen. Now, if I lived in a high crime area, I might be more hesitant, but otherwise there's not a large chance of that happening, so it can only be beneficial to carry around more money and save yourself some trips to the bank.

Keep em comin Steve. Thanks again.

[Abhey]

I'm curious if Steve or any of the other readers have read or heard about Ayn Rand. She was an author and philosopher that suggested that a society based around laissez faire capitalism and self interest is far superior then other systems. Her work has been called the capitalist manifesto, her books are cited by many top CEOs as the best business books they have ever read.

She has answers for many of the issues that have come up in this thread.
Specifically I think her work rather then getting you into the ( superficial) mindset of a millionaire will get you into the mindset of a productive successful entrepreneur.

I know which one I prefer!

[JanaMay]

I really enjoy your presentation and style Steve. I'm fairly new to blogging but started it as a result of a need I was noticing with some of the people I work with. I think you are absolutely correct, if your sole purpose is to make money, it's damn near impossible to earn a mill. But if there is something else that drives your passion, it's only fuel for the fire.

I'm new to your site, and I'm finding it very rewarding. If you don't mind I would like to refer your site to some of my clients and students I work with. I think they would benefit greatly.

Keep up the good work and if you have any advice for someone starting off...just shoot it this way

However, the more I read, the more tips I get...

Thanks,

Jane

[Greed]

Originally Posted by SuccessPundit

For me, the biggest influence has been surrounding myself with other wealthy people. To achieve a net worth of $1 million, deliberately reduce the time you spend with people that have a net worth below $1 million and deliberately increased the number of people with a net worth over $1 million. You'll notice several interesting changes:

This is what I have been working on for the past couple of years, and it's probably the most stressful, difficult, but most successful method of improving any aspect of life. I'm a senior in high school right now, and for the past two years I have made it a personal goal to go from "that guy" to "Ryan B." whom everybody recognizes and likes. I have moved from group to group, only staying with one set of people long enough to absorb their mindsets and gain enough of a springboard to move into the next popular group. Consequently, I've moved through the ranks of the kid who nobody knows, to a person who is greeted practically every day by three to five people in the school hall (in a school of 2,000 kids, it's impressive to have any1 recognize you.) Basically, what I'm getting at is that YES this is a very tricky way of doing it, but I believe it is the fastest way to propel yourself to the top of any chain.

[hotwired]

Steve definitely did his job on this one. My thought process went into overdrive. I've been drowning myself in every book about the LoA lately. I'm indepndently wealthy already so I can view this from another angle. What I am struggling with is "reconciling". That is, reconciling the "belief" that "becoming a millionaire requires hard work" (and all related thoughts that go with the article) with "If you intend and don't resist, your intention will come to you quickly. 1 million is no harder for the universe to deliver than $5.00". Any thoughts on this? Steve writes about living congruently as well as how valuable the ability to hold "different beliefs" concurrently is. This is something I wish to learn more about, and would like to start with this one!

[The Wise Turtle]

I just read this article, enjoyed a lot of it (thanks again!), and I wanted to offer a different perspective, about the last section, that some might find useful...

From what I've seen, "trolls" are actually very interested in the ideas they argue so vehemently against. Just like the loudest homophobes generally turn out to be gay, it seems that the folks many people call "trolls" (be they internet trolls or financial trolls) are really desperately looking for someone to prove them wrong (in their eyes) so that they can accept who they are and move on to a more healthy relationship with themselves.

I've seen this time and time again with many of the people I know and love who many would consider trolls. I have a pretty good idea why they do what they do, and it's not random aggression at all, but is specifically targetted at some internal conflict that they themselves are having. (Psychologists call this projection, when one's own thoughts and feelings are projected onto another, because the thoughts and feelings are seen as alien and dangerous. People say to themselves "I can't be X, because I was brought up to believe that people who are X are bad. However, I sense that someone here is X, but it can't possibly be me because I don't want to believe that I'm a bad person, so... it must be you who is X! Or you! Or maybe you?")

Obviously, if you aren't trained in some sort of mediation, Buddhist practice, psychotherapy, philosophy, early childhood education, or other form of mental/emotional health counseling, you're probably not going to be able to help the troll and might end up hurting yourself if you try. (I guess you could say that those professions are into the "extreme sports" of human relationships!) So, as Steve suggests, stay away from trolls as much as you can, and don't engage them unless you are willing to get hurt, and understand what the risks are.

But it does at least seem to help when you realize that the more aggressive and antagonistic people (trolls) get about something on the outside, the less confident and more confused they really feel on the inside. So you can feel pity for them, rather than letting yourself get dragged down into their ever deepening pit of low self esteem!

Peace, Love, and Bicycles,
-Turtle

[Savage]

To the universe $5 and a million are no different. To the person attracting them though, there will be varying degrees of resistance. To receive larger amounts, more of a shift is required, which usually takes more time.

In a strange way, I feel as if the million manifested as soon as I intended it. But the process of its arrival plays out over time as I go through the shifts needed to claim it.

[Glass Joe]

Steve,

You may have already considered this and decided that it just wasn't the path you wanted to take to make your first million, but have you thought about starting your own publishing company? Something like "Pavlina Press"?

To get an idea of what I mean, the kind of people I'm thinking of include:

- Tim O'Reilly and his computer-related "animal" books.
- Tom Rollins and his Teaching Company audio programs.
- Earl Nightingale and Lloyd Conant and their Nightingale-Conant audio programs.
- Robert Kiyosaki and his "Rich Dad" series of products.
- Andy Hunt and Dave Thomas and their "Pragmatic Programmer" series of products.

All of the above example products, in my opinion, have a higher level of quality to them that aren't there *only* because of the particular author/teacher of that particular book/program. The publisher also adds it's own level of quality and value to each book or program that, I think, wouldn't otherwise be there if the author pubished their book/program somewhere else.

I don't know... Maybe you could make your first million by helping other people express their own unique ideas and techniques on personal development by providing them with an outlet and a platform for them to reach even more people than they could on their own. Similar to Nightingale Conant - Earl Nightingale had his own personal development ideas and he published his own audio programs (which are great BTW), but he also helped other people publish their own personal development ideas too.

[Scipio]

Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina in 5 Wealth Lessons

I also started thinking about what I could do with a million dollars. One idea I find very inspiring is to found a non-profit personal development organization, which would ultimately have thousands of individual groups all around the world. In structure I imagine it being similar to Toastmasters International, which has 200,000 members and 10,000 clubs worldwide. You could find a local group near you filled with people dedicated to helping and supporting each other grow, very similar to a mastermind group. In fact, the Local Groups forum on this site is a very basic first step towards the realization of that long-term vision. Forum members are already having local meet-ups in cities around the world. I’m so excited to see this happening. Best of all it’s 100% free for everyone.

Steve, so many people would find value in an online site that allowed people interested in personal development to meet up (or a group called "Masterminds" like Toastmasters but focussed on all aspects of PD). I would love to see that be a reality, but it's not something congruent with my purpose for me to create. You could probably do this if you wanted.

[edmamula]

Hi Steve,

I don't have to tell you twice that perception is reality. When you say that making a million dollars is difficult, my brain screams that this is just another limiting belief. This relates well to your post on "Showing Up"...what are the odds of becoming a millionaire? There are things that we can do every day to show up for the task of becoming a millionaire. Showing up isn't difficult, but manifesting the intention isn't necessarily quick either. Making a million isn't easy or difficult; it's just another goal....making a million this year is a different story!

Nevertheless, I'll race you to a million ;-) You've got a head start on me. Anyone can check my progress at EdMamula.com