How to Beat the Competition (Blog)

[Silent Lucidity]

Personal Development is seen as different things to different individuals, depending on what your beliefs are in the first place. Doing something to feel good... yes acknowledges the ego... and yet, isn't the deeper 'feeling good' the goal, the feeling that goes beyond the ego... If one believes everything is illusory, than personal development for them would be to lift the curtain of illusion... to see deeper... and to come out with that seeing, better able to 'work' the illusion. The idea of subjective reality touches on that.

Someone recently told me about people that have only a small percentage of the brain matter of the rest of us 'normal' folks. The article apparently pointed to a theory of holographic consciousness among humans... like we are far more a part of each other than previously realized. Thus you could possibly tap into knowledge of things you wished to know, or become.

This changes the idea of personal development somewhat... but the result is the same as if you believe in subjective reality.... but in a way it could be better, since you can 'tap in' to group consciousness to learn things... and you are not 'alone' as in subjective reality.

Well Steve, I'm very excited about your book, whether (other versions of) these principles have been around for thousands or years or not. We are all looking for the one thing that clicks.... that works... and for each of us, that idea may be different... so why not take the time to read something that has a good chance of being effective?

Your blog about competition was absolutely the most prefect message I needed to hear in this moment. The idea of tackling the more difficult problem could truly work here... It has worked in the past, yes... either way, a great reminder..... Nice synchroncity Steve!

I have one question though, if time is a factor, and in seeking a more challenging solution to a problem, more time must be invested... what if the one solving the problem does not know what the deadline is? How does one balance the amount of time with the difficulty/simplicity of the solution to the problem?

[Keith]

Originally Posted by DavidDavidDavid

Keith: Archeologists guesstimate that the wheel was invented only ~8-10K B.C., though the oldest wheel ever discovered dates to ~3.5K B.C.
I think it's pretty safe to say that for such a primitive level of social development, personal development would have been incomprehensible. Remember, Steve deals in p.d. for *smart* people! ;-)

This really is off-topic. But interesting, so...

The oldest wheel may date back to ~3.5k B.C. but humans had the same mental capacity 100,000 years ago as they do now. Personal Development isn't about technology, it's about improving your intrinsic (in this context, probably mostly mental) capabilities. That would be as viable then as it is now.

Still, this is all speculation until we actually see what the 7 'universal' principles are. Then we can come back to whether they truly are suitable for cavemen (and I can say "told you so!" ).

[Niki]

Originally Posted by DavidDavidDavid

Nikki: As I alluded to previously, I think the term "personal development" is illusory to begin with -- like when advertisers say there's a "free" toy in each Cracker Jack or something (nothing's "free" there; it's included in the price of the product already).

"Personal development" is often taken to mean "bettering oneself"...but that "self" is illusory...how can you better something that's illusory? It's just switching one color of curtain for another within the prison of one's own mind.

Most people really don't know themselves...what they know is their own egos, their brain's self-projected reflections...the brain is a pattern-generating machine, you see...all the brain does is generate patterns, like how all the heart does is contract, contract, contract...that's why we naturally see familiar shapes in random cloud formations, etc. -- our brains are always looking to connect the dots...evolutionarily, this was a great thing in terms of survival, of course, but now that many of us are out of such literal fight-or-flight environments, the ego, like the body's innate propensity to store fat, has become a huge problem threatening the destruction of the species....

Just some thoughts to consider -- read some Krishnamurti, Erich Fromm, Viktor Frankl, and Marcus Aurelius for the "philosophical context" to my remarks...it would be way out of the scope of this thread to expound on them, sorry...one more tantalizing morsel: which comes first, the thinker or the thinking process?

Your answer to that question will demonstrate your beliefs about a "self" that exists...that question points to the very crux of the matter concerning so-called "personal development"...remember that scene from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" where the Jack Nicholson character says to all his fellow inmates something along the lines of, what's the matter with you?? You've got no problems, you're all okay! So one is shy, another talks to himself, etc. -- that's normal! Perfectly normal!

(Don't recall the scene exactly but that's the gist of it.)

I get the philosophical context, don't worry.

About "which comes first, the thinker or the thinking process?" I would dare to say they both came together, hell they didn't even came, they just are.

about: "Most people really don't know themselves". Do you know your self? Or do you THINK you know your self?


"the brain is a pattern-generating machine, you see...all the brain does is generate patterns, like how all the heart does is contract, contract, contract...that's why we naturally see familiar shapes in random cloud formations, etc. -- our brains are always looking to connect the dots...evolutionarily, this was a great thing in terms of survival, of course, but now that many of us are out of such literal fight-or-flight environments, the ego, like the body's innate propensity to store fat, has become a huge problem threatening the destruction of the species...."

While this is a little true, instead of seeing the ego as a treath, you can see it as a tool. .

"Your answer to that question will demonstrate your beliefs about a "self" that exists...that question points to the very crux of the matter concerning so-called "personal development""

The answer to this question is just my ego talking to yours. Nothing more nothing less.

footnote

If you think that spiritual about personal development, then there was no need for it, because our "self" is allready perfect. Yet everybody is searching and developing their skills.

[evelynlim]

Hi Steve, I love your article! It just shows that you pour a lot of love, hard work and energy to whatever project you have on hand. Your commitment to it is always way past 100%. How many of us can claim that? We tend to get distracted easily with other ideas or deceptively "easier" ways, which will prove us wrong in the end, and resulting in more time wastage and lack of focus.

[Bruce Achterberg]

Originally Posted by DavidDavidDavid

Bruce: I was responding to your and Steve's posts in this thread. I do understand what you guys are getting at; I just think it's a bit besides the thrust of my question.

It's like if I'm asking you how can I hit the ball farther, and you guys answer, don't worry about it, just eat, rest, practice, and you'll do just fine.

I'm not saying your answers have been wrong or unhelpful: I'm just saying that I'm asking a different sort of question.

I think there's a Yiddish saying to the effect that all the Talmud really says is, love God, love Man, the rest is commentary....

Now if a Jew goes to his rabbi about some problem, he needs an answer to the specifics of the problem. Ultimately, the answer will be in keeping with the "love God, love Man" goal, but for the rabbi to simply respond with love God, love Man would be kind of besides the point.

It's important to be reminded, of course, that yes, creativity, serving a need, and playing to one's unique strengths in the creation of value is the best hedge against competition, such that there can be no competition.

Yes, yes, Sun Tzu observed that to win without fighting is a sign of the true fighter, okay...but the question remains, how do I use this sword to parry??

In business, one way (besides innovating -- I mean, look at Microsoft versus anyone else besides Google/Yahoo!) to fight the competition is through advertising.

I was just wondering what other way there was besides advertising.

I'll take a quick shot at answering this...

So you're looking for specific advice rather then general advice?

If so, thinking that you need to "parry" is approaching things from the wrong mindset. I'd advise against that.

Play to your strengths

My particular way to beat the competition literally is what I mentioned -- playing to my strengths.

A strength isn't what you're good at; a strength is an activity that strengthns you -- something that makes use of your innate talents; your most commonly reccuring thoughts and behaviour, which are driven by the strongest, most well-connected neuron connections in your brain.

Find what you're good at

So find what you're good at -- what strengths you. For me, one of the things I'm good at is seeing the big picture and creating solutions that hold up from a variety of different perspectives. I recently applied this strength to create an Icebreaker for toastmasters which was refered to as "the best icebreaker [speech] I've ever heard" by a member of my club. I also won the award that night for best speech.

So, what did I do?

Well, I knew I had to create an icebreaker speech -- something that would get me speaking and teach the audience something about me. I knew that most people write icebreakers about events, things they've done, what they do, their physical attributes such as their titles, names, etc. For me, that wasn't a good fit. Anybody can do that, and unless you had strengths in story telling, or something, it probably wouldn't be a good speech.

So instead, I looked at the big picture. I was looking for a speech idea that was universally applicable, universally relate-able, and so familiar to me that I'd be able to speak about it easily without excessive preparation. I was pretty stumped, so I went out into nature, sat down at a bench, and brought some sheets of paper with my along with my Toasmasters manual and a copy of a poem I recently read.

At first, I had the idea to use the poem to give structure to my speech, but then, while glancing at it, I noticed that it said "and you learn...". That's when the idea struck me -- I'd be writing about something I've learned in life. But not only that, I'd choose the most impactful insights I know of, and would talk about those. I came up with 3 insights. They were universally applicable. They were easy to relate to by everyone, especially after I tailored my examples I gave in my speech to the audience. They were easy for me to talk about because, somewhere in my brain, all this information was stored.

The end result was that I gave what I consider to be an excellent speech, and what others considered to be the best speech of the night. This was not my first speech (I competed in a tall tales competition prior to doing my ice breaker), but it was the first speech I had a decent amount of time to prepare for.

Applying what you're good at universally

So, delving into my method even more, what I did was use the knowledge I have of my strength(s) to come up with a criteria -- the "universal" criteria I mentioned before. That fit me well, and I knew any speech ideas I came up with that didn't meet that criteria weren't a good fit for me. Then, I actively waited for inspiration. I went out into conditions I knew were conductive to inspiration (nature) and brought along something to stimulate my mind and give me ideas (the poem). I'm hopeless at coming up ideas with myself, but when I look at the things in front of me, I start building highly abstract, very generalised mental associations and ideas start flowing.

There may be other strengths you aren't yet aware of

That said, it was still hard work to write the speech. Why? Because the writing approach I was using wasn't a strength of mine. I could do it, but I sucked at it, and it wasn't easy. It was using what I didn't have, instead of using what I did have (my talents). Eventually I had the idea that perhaps my approach was wrong, and when I tried out that idea, it worked, and it led me to give an approx. 13 minute speech on-the-fly with no use of notes. I certainly prepared the ideas I had by making sure I could remember them by practicing presenting the speech, but I didn't -- even once -- rely on notes. I learned that I have a strength in being able to verbalise or write about complex concepts without needing to reference anything else but my ideas. This insight will prove invaluable to me.

So that's an example. As you can see, I very literally applied what I've been talking about. Often people say that what Steve talks about isn't practical, and from their perspective, it's probably true. I think Steve and I are so familiar with using our "strengths" that we forget that other people don't necessarily have the same ability to take very high level concepts and break them down such that they're applicable on a "practical" level. How we do this would be different, but the basic strength is the same.

What to do from here

David, find what you're good at -- what strengthens you -- and then do more of that with your work.

I also highly recommend the book, Now, Discover Your Strengths and Go, Put Your Strengths to Work. I've only read the former book, but I've got a good idea of the ideas presented in G,PYSTW, and I plan to purchase it and can say that there's a good chance that book will be very, very well worth it for others as well.

The ideas the author of the book presents are revolutionary and will change your approach to life. I've long known the predominant approach to life was largely not that good, but I didn't know the alternative, so I read books and articles looking for it, discarding "isn't it". Eventually I found something (the ideas from the books I recommend above) that was not "isn't it" (I wrote that sentence like that intentionally).

In other words, I didn't yet know if it "was it" -- all I knew was that it lacked the qualities that books that fell into the "isn't it" category. After I learned the concepts, I applied them to my life experience and found that, yes, they worked. They were the exact opposite of the "isn't it" concepts I was frustrated with, and gave me the results I intuitively knew where possible. They weren't "truth", but nothing ever is. Relative to me, they were ideas that I could effectively use and use to help others, so I now advocate the hell out of them, heh. (Only because they're good. Believe me, the ideas were subject to a very rigorous criteria. When it comes to concepts, I'm a quality Nazi.)

Postscript

David, I want to thank you for being so confused and curious about this matter. Seriously. Responding to your posts has been very, very, very beneficial to me. I even used a post I typed out for you to help me structure one section of my speech! Funny how contribution tends to by synergistic, instead of exhaustive, as it deceptively appears to be.

Postscript #2

If you have the eye for it (ie. the talents), you can look at other people's success, figure out how they are playing to their strengths, and in turn, spot the general pattern behind all of it and then use that pattern for yourself. This won't work for everyone, though, since not everyone can clearly see underlying patterns.

[DavidDavidDavid]

Keith: I agree; I love idle speculation! I don't think we're too off-topic, though. After all, the claim that "personal development" can even apply to cavemen is really quite extraordinary.

Whether they have the "capacity" to do something isn't quite the issue. Autistic children have the same general mental capacity as anyone -- many are considered very smart, even -- except they can't read emotions, sometimes worse than a dog!

Similarly, I just don't think people who couldn't imagine something as simple as the wheel could make sense of anything as ambiguous as "personal development." Even the Athenians, in all their wisdom, couldn't imagine a democracy without slaves. (I don't mean that we ourselves are too much further along, what with our wage slavery, et al.) Technological development is but one aspect of social development, and a people without need of writing or wheels is almost certainly one without want of personal development coaches.

Of course, a New Ager would claim that the prehistoric citizens of ancient Atlantis were very highly developed indeed! ;-)

Anyway, it will be fun to meet again once Steve's book comes out. Whether I agree with what he says, I do believe it will be interesting, yes.

[DavidDavidDavid]

Bruce: I'm certainly keeping tabs on what my strengths may be and how that might make me useful to the world. It's one reason why I haven't just "ran off" with money-making in all this time, despite being voted "most likely to succeed" in high school (and we're talking NYC high schools, with populations of ~5K students). All these years I've been on a sort of quest -- a fool's errand, even -- to try to contribute something to the world....

I say that to show you that I really can identify with what you and Steve have been saying...I've basically been living my life thus far that way...as you might imagine, I'm also a writer...and you know what -- I think this is the year when things start really jelling together!

So I do appreciate the reminder to focus on creation, as opposed to mere competition. I'm certainly bearing it in mind in terms of content creation as I keep thinking about my website idea. As a matter of fact, I'm so interested in the subject of "competition" precisely because I haven't spent much time thinking about it previously. You see, I'm really big and athletic. Like them Greco-Roman statues in the art museum; honestly. But for all that, I've never gotten into sports because I couldn't stand having to make someone lose. Really! It's a very weird thing...I have a whole big theory on the whys and wherefores of that, but suffice it to say here, I've been quite competition-shy my whole life because people either hate me for taking away what they think should otherwise be theirs, or they start being a "follower" of sorts, with all the expectations and entanglements that brings....

It's just that having come upon Steve's site by way of looking for self-employment opportunities, I was suddenly struck by how competition can be "just for fun." Like casual sex or something! I guess I had a competition hang-up the way some people have a sexual hang-up of some sort. (Actually, the high school and college competition for girls also struck me as something I didn't quite want to do. I really do get embarrassed by being the Hot Shot.) Now I'm not sure if it's something I read in one of Steve's articles that set off such an epiphany, or whether it's the cumulative effect of everything going on in my life and Steve's stuff was just the spark that set the tinder burning, but I'm overcoming my competition shyness...part of it is, I'm tired of trying to hide myself in order that others don't feel stupid and then get mad or something.

So I say all that, in case you and Steve might have been trying to prevent some kind of "blood-thirst" developing in me (or someone like me), because my killer instincts are actually rather subdued most of the time.

Anyway, I'm really glad you found our discussions of some practical import! I've been afraid of getting "too cerebral" because many people feel talked-down-to when that happens. Thanks for your fellowship on this forum of Steve's! You're one of those people that keeps other people honest. ;-)

[DavidDavidDavid]

Lucidity: It is precisely because the label "personal development" can be so widely interpreted that I question its actual utility. Moreover, the very fact that so many feel so differently about it suggests how ineffective any set of universal principles can be.

As for a "feeling good" that's "beyond the ego"...sure, it seems possible -- but it doesn't seem like something most people have reached, and therefore for most people "feeling good" is actually all about massaging their egos...for example, notice how these days we have money-oriented pastors and preachers on TV. Did they forget how Jesus threw out the money-changers and trinket-sellers from the House of the Lord??

Now I think the holographic consciousness you speak of would actually point to the illusory nature of all the universe -- as the Hindus say, we are all a part of Vishnu's dreaming, and when He wakes, everything will end.

"We measure our heavy steps with time and space/and are, and know it not, in eternity's midst." ~Johann Gottfried v. Herder

[Erki]

One way to beat the competition is to start cooperating..

[francstoic]

Dear Steve,

Please could you kindly share those seven golden words of wisdom? Everyone will honestly appreciate it (plus your publisher won't mind it, just seven words)

In sincere gratitude,
Frank

[Keith]

Originally Posted by francstoic

Dear Steve,

Please could you kindly share those seven golden words of wisdom? Everyone will honestly appreciate it (plus your publisher won't mind it, just seven words)

Nah, he wants to save it as a surprise.

Besides, that way we can spot the major flaw in them after it's published.