Overcoming Jealousy (Blog)

[jlolson]

Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina

I hardly see scarcity when there are 7 billion people available to relate to. Even if you narrow it down quite a bit, there's still a massive abundance.

Scarcity thinking is when you get too attached and try to hold time still to avoid change. This is a very fear-based approach. It's anyone's choice to live that way, but it seems rather disempowering to resist the inevitability of change. If you resist change, it will simply be forced about you. Better to live in tune with reality than try to rail against it.

Change is good. Change helps us grow. No change = no growth = stagnation.

If you feel safe here (which is essentially a choice), you needn't fear loss. When it happens you accept it and grow through it.

To say that any experience is bad is to make a personal judgment from a certain perspective. If you want to go around labeling things as bad, that's your choice to make. But it's not a requirement for your existence.

Well, one could say that labeling an experience as good is a personal judgment...what isn't? I guess my only objection is that some of your claims seem a tad too strong (and I've voice my objections fairly clearly here, I think). But the important point I think you're making is the "glass half-full, half-empty" one. It's weird, but I found myself wandering around feeling thirsty a lot more when I thought of the glass as being half-empty.

On a different note, I tried your "rise about the storm"/sadness is joy approach this morning, when my girlfriend canceled our upcoming get-together. First, I stepped above myself, and viewed my emotions more objectively. But one step wasn't quite far enough, I found. So I took another really large step and kind of hovered there...and sure enough, gazing down upon my horribly disappointed avatar, I found myself snickering at his pitiable, primitive emotions, and actually just kind of enjoying his suffering in a hopefully not perverse way.

Seriously, I was able because of that to be relaxed and compassionate with my girlfriend rather than do my usual feeling rejected and angry routine. Thanks for that.

[Cochonette]

YAY!!! This is just what I needed. After reading Levels of Consciousness, I realized that I was still a bit stuck on Pride and was getting pulled back from Courage and Neutrality... Jealousy seems to be a form of Pride, and oh man, if I could be free of it... I would feel SO much better about myself... because I've been feeling like I destroyed a friendship due to Pride. And I kind of knew the things this article talks about, but it's so good to just have them all there on the same page and specifically addressing the issue.

I want to heal this friendship... it causes me so much pain. Thank you!!!!