not PD people about PD

[placebo]

Did you ever tried to explain what personal development mean to you? What was their response? Or maybe you have links for articles where growing internet PD communities are described by someone outside that community?

I'd like to see their side and it's kind of silly to go out and ask everyone...

[Bruce Achterberg]

I find it difficult, or near impossible, to talk to "non-PD" people about personal development, positivity, improvement, living consciously, "eye on the prize"-type thinking, etc. I’d be interested to see what responses you get in this thread. I’ve personally been doing personal development-type activities with the goal of constant improvement all my life, so the “non-PD” mindset is completely outside of my experience.

PD people and non-PD people may actually end up taking the same, or at least very similar actions, but there is a very different mindset behind the actions of PD people, and I find the actions take on a different quality. As to why that is I cannot say, but it’s something I’m currently exploring in more detail at the moment. (I think it has a lot to do with ego identification and awareness, or lack thereof... but the “rabbit hole” seems to be far deeper then I expected and I’m catching glimpses of greater depth.)

In my experience, most non-PD people I interact with are far too concerned with the "happenings" of their life to take a few steps back and actually take a moment to consciously consider the happenings. Their life is like an on-going stream of repetition -- either a race to get to the future, or a struggle to get away from the past/present. If anything, I’d liken it to living in a dream. There may be lots of “stuff” going on, but really, nobody’s home and nothing’s really happening.

And as such, discussing things like PD with non-PD people is like punching them in the face -- it's often a very rude awakening, and they feel threatened by what you talk about. It’s almost like you talk another language, and they either can’t understand you, or if they do understand you, they completely misinterpret what you’re saying and start getting defensive and go into what I call “attack/defend” mode to protect their identity.

And I find the “attack/defend” mode very difficult to penetrate (it can be done, but usually the non-PD people flee naked into the desert screaming “The horror, the horror!” before then ). Ultimately, you want to reach the “share/explore/question” mode where the search space of subject matter can be explored and questioned without attachment to the subject matter, and opinions, perspectives, and ideas can be shared openly and freely. To me, that’s the very core of PD-type discussion. Without it, discussion is much more about reaction then it is about exploration/sharing.

But despite what I’ve said said, I don’t believe non-PD people are “misguided” or “bad” or anything like that. I just think that they’ve picked up lots of limiting, disempowering patterns, habits, and beliefs... oh, and they smell funny. Beneath all of that there really is something great, it’s just very obscured and rarely shines through.

Hopefully my post will spur some discussion from the non-PD people (that is, if they haven't already quit reading it in protest and run off into the desert in their birthday suit). I’m sure the overly general writing style I used and the blatant labelling of the (smelly) non-PD people will get someone offended enough to share their perspective. Maybe I’ll even get a visitor reading this post outraged enough to sign up to the forums so that he/she can debunk my “outrageous” claims... at which point it’s too late for them -- they've become a “PD person” themselves. (They still smell funny, though.)

[Shamou]

Excellent post Bruce...

I have been in PD for decades... I have taken over 100 seminars... and I also have given a great many over two decades... and I have found that when dealing with PD people... things go very well... however... I have tried for over six months to introduce PD in a forum where there were very few PD people... a very enlightening experience for me... but I have also been subjected to a great many personal attacks and a few flaming wars...

So, I finally gave up... and came here... best thing that I have done in a long time...

.

[Peter S C]

For me personal development is, well, quite personal. Because of this I tend to only discuss it with people close to me or that I know are of a similar mindset (thank you Steve Pavlina forums!).

If anyone has seen 'Little Miss Sunshine' you will remember the father who always trys to relate things back to the 9 steps - I think to non-PD people that how PD talk can come across.