What should I do ?

[Darky]

Its been for 9 months now. I feel nothing.

I dont have any emotions or anything similar to them.
I feel like I dont have my soul or my self any longer.

thinking about solving my problem and trying to breaking my own "cage" makes me "feel" totally irritating and hopeless, but its still far from emotion.

I simply dont remember this 9 months .. its like I havent really lived them.
and I also dont remember my past.

I can't think, i can't remember.. I try to feel but there is nothing to feel.
Nothing makes sense. I even hardly descriebe all this , since its not like I am I




So should I choose for some medicine **** like antidepressants ?
I know its chemichal ♥♥♥♥ but I heard that a lot of people could feel after taking them


Or should I just wait ? but I don't think that there is matter dark night of the soul of me, since I experienced trauma it is totally diffrent..

or perform shamanic healing instead ? but the problem is, there isnt any shamans in my country and im too young for traveling alone.