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Old 06-21-2010, 10:22 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Limiting belief!

I found out a limiting belief today. I don't like doing 'silly things' in public! I become very shy or when people laugh at me, I feel like they are intending to hurt!

By silly things, I mean things like dancing and singing. I have a great voice, but I become very embarrassed when I am discovered doing that .

Any help leaving this belief behind me would be lovely!

Andrew.
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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what does it mean about you when people laugh at you intending to hurt you? Like, "I am ____." What does it mean about you when people discover you singing and dancing?
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:31 PM   #3 (permalink)
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When people look at me like I am crazy or laugh at me when I do something 'strange', I feel like I am not normal enough. I have to calm down.

Like my mom caught me practicing the moon walk yesterday when I was doing it just because I felt like doing it! She laughed, and I know that I was not being made fun of, but, it felt like I was not 'good'. Like I was embarrassing myself.

But who cares what others think, right?
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:35 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Do you feel like digging a little deeper?
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:38 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Most of the time we don't do these things cause we've been taught there bad.. just tell yourself your not bad.. I would say change the belief that is getting you the negative feedback..

Know that you can act out in public and be silly and let other people give you there disconcerting or ego envious looks

You know what I would do if I were you.. go to youtube and find "whistle while you work videos" and "skipping on the street" and "moon walk" videos and just watch a ton of them every time.. you notice this belief coming up.. know that others do it all the time.. and it's acceptable.. even if not seen often enough
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:44 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I am not sure. It seems like I can dance by myself. Alone.

But if I dance in public or sing without purpose, I feel like I am going to be made fun of. It's not right for me to dance or sing to myself. I cannot enjoy myself because wearing my feelings outside makes me weird... I could be made fun of easily.
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:47 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I dance every morning, I love it, it makes me smile, it energises me, you should try it!
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Old 06-21-2010, 10:57 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by st33med View Post
I feel like I am going to be made fun of. It's not right for me to dance or sing to myself.
Ohh.. if you say so..

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Originally Posted by st33med View Post
I cannot enjoy myself because wearing my feelings outside makes me weird... I could be made fun of easily.
That's your fear.. and that's your problem.. if you want my advice..

Spend some time.. loving and liking yourself..

It's like saying.. in the mirror.. "I don't love myself enough to dance"

"I don't like myself enough to dance"

"I'm not worthy of dancing"

"I'm unworthy of love"

"I fear being ridiculed by others"

It's that fear that is your limitation and your belief.. and the reason you started this thread..

Does that fear/limitation/belief serve you?

Ask yourself.. and the answer you get is the one for you.. but for most everyone here really.. the answer is NO

Fear is in everyone's hearts and minds.. but it's the fear of self.. it's you in the mirror and your going "BOO!" (with a ghost sheet and all )
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Old 06-21-2010, 11:04 PM   #9 (permalink)
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But if I dance in public or sing without purpose, I feel like I am going to be made fun of. It's not right for me to dance or sing to myself. I cannot enjoy myself because wearing my feelings outside makes me weird... I could be made fun of easily.
What does it mean about you when you are made fun of?
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:37 AM   #10 (permalink)
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What does it mean about you when you are made fun of?
I don't understand what you are asking...
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:08 AM   #11 (permalink)
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I don't understand what you are asking...
When you're made fun of, it reactivates something that you believe is true about yourself.

If someone were to tease you that you're a giant purple alligator, you wouldn't recognize any truth about yourself in that at all, and you wouldn't be upset or stopped in any way, right? You'd just shrug your shoulders and think something like, "well, that's crazy talk."

But when someone makes fun of you, it's because they're seeing something about you that does resonate as truth. Your grown-up self may *know* it's not true, but your child self is hurt because it FEELS true.

"I feel like I am going to be made fun of. It's not right for me to dance or sing to myself. And that means that I am ______."

What is it you're believing? When you hit on it, it'll hit you like a ton of bricks, it'll feel so familiar and so pervasive in your life.
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:09 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I believe you will feel better about this if you learn to laugh at yourself.
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:21 PM   #13 (permalink)
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I believe you will feel better about this if you learn to laugh at yourself.
Me, too. And one excellent way to learn to laugh with yourself is to examine your beliefs about yourself -- and to see what's been running you all these years. It usually turns out to be pretty funny! Although it doesn't tend to feel funny when you're being run by it.
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:31 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I don't know how to fill in the blank. I am ... not normal? I am shy?
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:40 PM   #15 (permalink)
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I don't know how to fill in the blank. I am ... not normal? I am shy?
If you're interested in boldly looking (and you don't have to -- this is only for you if you feel it's right for you now to examine it), you can simply just choose to keep looking until you find what you believe about yourself at a deeply unconscious level -- the belief that gets reactivated when someone thinks you're silly, and you feel embarrassed or bad in any way.

When you find it, there will be no question in your mind. It'll smack you upside the head, and you'll notice how it's EVERYWHERE in your life -- this belief that you have been simultaneously trying to prove is not true and trying to avoid people finding out IS true.

Another way to approach is to ask yourself, "when is the earliest time I felt this feeling (the one that you get when people make fun of you)?" How old were you? Who was there? What happened? What was said? And what did you decide about yourself right there in that moment?
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:04 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I know. I am trying to feel accepted in society.

This stretches beyond just dancing and singing and stuff. Whenever I have someone poke fun at me for something I did that is not normal, I have a tendency to always keep quiet or avoid the person's remark. I once tried to go vegan, and I was constantly poked fun at for eating this stuff. Even after I stopped (Not a lot of support. Matter of fact, there was not much to eat in my household that was vegan...), people kept poking fun at me, saying that my little strange adventure was over. Even though I have a desire to return to being vegan, I stay quiet about it...

That, and the fact that my mom knew that I go to this place, this 'strange forum' makes me want to go off topic. I feel ashamed whenever she talks about it, even though I know I shouldn't be.
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:06 PM   #17 (permalink)
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And it makes sense. I had a psychic read from my Akashic Record and she said that I had a contract with social norms that she removed. I guess this was instilled in me before I was even born here.
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:14 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Well, is it time to renegotiate that contract?
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:16 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Well, is it time to renegotiate that contract?
No, it's been removed! It's just a belief that has been limiting me now!
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:48 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Where do I go now with this belief?
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Old 06-22-2010, 05:43 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Where do I go now with this belief?
What is the limiting belief, exactly?

I don't like doing 'silly things' in public! That's a preference, not a limiting belief.
I become very shy or when people laugh at me. That's a tendency you've noticed, not a limiting belief.
I feel like they are intending to hurt! That's an emotion you feel in response to a stimuli, not a limiting belief.

What is it you believe is true about yourself, that has you limited in power or effectiveness?

Last edited by Angela; 06-22-2010 at 05:45 PM.
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Old 06-22-2010, 05:47 PM   #22 (permalink)
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That I feel I have to follow societal norms. Whenever someone comments on me doing something odd, I feel I have to hide that part from everyone because its shameful.
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Old 06-22-2010, 06:03 PM   #23 (permalink)
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That I feel I have to follow societal norms. Whenever someone comments on me doing something odd, I feel I have to hide that part from everyone because its shameful.
Okay, great. My answer to your question about what to do with that is: Examine it. I recommend digging deeper, when you're ready. In the meanwhile, examine this layer. Try The Work of Byron Katie -- very effective!

The Work of Byron Katie
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Old 06-24-2010, 09:33 PM   #24 (permalink)
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I have the same problem. Through the use of the Release Technique and the Sedona Method, I realized that it was a feeling of wanting approval. These two techniques are wonderful for letting go of the fear and letting go of wanting approval.

It is just a decision.

Good luck!
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Old 06-24-2010, 09:50 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by st33med View Post
I found out a limiting belief today. I don't like doing 'silly things' in public! I become very shy or when people laugh at me, I feel like they are intending to hurt!

By silly things, I mean things like dancing and singing. I have a great voice, but I become very embarrassed when I am discovered doing that .

Any help leaving this belief behind me would be lovely!

Andrew.
I can help you. This is a fear of being judged. Consequently, you also judge others. You need to learn to love others unconditionally, regardless of how silly they might be.

Think about this: When someone is dancing in public, everyone might think they are silly and ridiculous...and they might even make fun of the dancer. At the same time, however, everyone is smiling. It makes people happy to see others being silly. It reminds us not to take life so seriously. Even if people are laughing at you, it should make you feel good that you're making others happy.

Embrace the light, friend. Tell the fear to go away, genuinely, 50 times. And it will.
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