Deviation from "Love or Fear God" Thread

[JoeRad]

To avoid derailing that thread, I want to post my thoughts on the matter here.

http://www.stevepavlina.com/forums/c...-new-post.html

Originally Posted by newsbone

There are only two sides of the story and there is never a grey area, it does not matter if you call one side god, force, eternity etc. The only thing is that you are with us or with them

Its this kind of thinking that ha turned me off to the whole thing. Not the idea that there is absolute truth, but the idea that we can claim to have absolute truth, when we are in a limited reality. Thus, anything we do is based upon personal belief at this point in our existence, thus leading to us all just following ourselves in the end; no need for some higher, dictatorial power telling us of which is the "right" way or the wrong way.

I was once someone who "followed god" (as defied by right-wing Catholicism). I followed because I feared what would happen if I was wrong. See, I saw doubts and saw logical fallacies with this concept of the infinite, but the words always reverberated in me "Don't tempt the Lord" & "What are you to defied what God has said is true".

I then saw this as hard to live by, so I though of myself as a flawed creation, and then moved onto loving God with my heart...I truly felt close to Him, I felt close to the Lord. Thing is, the nagging feeling never went away...I always felt there was more, that what I was doing was kind of hollow...like nothing was there. I was told I was merely living in the "dark nigh of the sole" and that I was either being tested by God for my strength of Faith, or the Devil was really out to get me now because of my renewed love of God.

Until one day I realized God had not said it to me, humans had, flawed ones like, me, all following there personal beliefs..and slowly I realized that I can't just discount all that I believe, all that I find to be "more true" then the seemingly contradictory dictates of my faith, and what people see as "God".

Do I still fear, yes, I do. I fear for myself I am wrong....that I will have either hurt Someone who is all good and wants the best for me, and I'm very misguided, or I fear that I have incurred the wrath of the one person in all of creation you DON'T want to piss off.

But I'm moving beyond my fear. I know I live in a universe of limited knowledge, and that in the end, what each person believes is a crap-shoot. The concepts used to get around this that "the laws of God are written on each mans heart, and those that don;t find the truth are rejecting that internal moral calling".....its all rationalization...its all ideas though up by other humans. We don't know the truth, we won't until we leave this existence, and if some people are right, we still won't know it all.

For me, that great. It means I am truly free. I'm free to experience this world in whatever way I wish, without a cosmic overlord scoring me points, one way or another. I do believe that if I am horrible wrong...then I will deal with the consequences. In the end, that all we can do. Do what we can, believe what we can, and hope for the best.

If there were the vindictive...oh, I'm sorry the word used is "just" God, then I invoke the great words of Jean Luc Picard, "You're not God! The universe is not so poorly designed!"

Thanks for reading. Thoughts are always welcome.

[lifetimelearner]

interesting Joe
I will get back to you after I meet my security needs by going to work today