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Old 05-29-2008, 08:34 PM
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Default Total Egoic Rant
My ego is OUT OF CONTROL this week.

It's bad. I KNOW it's bad, but I am not stopping it.

WHY do we do this sometimes???

I feel the need to justify myself and correct people. And I feel the need to instill my beliefs on others. I feel the need to make it out like I am somehow "being put out" by certain things. I feel the need to express my crabbiness. UGH!!!

Now that I know what it is, and why I do this, maybe that makes it even that much worse??

I have not felt like this in two months... now I just feel... GRRRRrrrRRRR!

Stupid ego.

Okay... that was wrong. UGH.. it's not "wrong"... I can accept this, right? Accept and move on??

The ego.. darn the ego!!!!

I get that we don't have to be "happy-happy-joy-joy" all the time. So, I have to accept that right now I am irritated. I am highly irritated. Okay... I accept it, now what?
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Old 05-29-2008, 09:03 PM
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You're doing the right thing. Just accept it and let it go. One technique I learned from the Sedona Method is to INVITE those feelings in. That way, you're annihilating your resistance to the bad feelings. Picture them as bad guys. Normally you say, "oh no! The bad guys are after me! I can't have them here!"

What would happen if you invited the bad guys over for lunch? Not so bad anymore, huh? They might throw an insult at you and point a knife at you, but if you invite them, then they'll feel silly and sit down to turkey sandwiches.

The way I see it, the ego isn't BAD, but it needs to be kept in balance.
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Old 05-29-2008, 09:13 PM
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Well, at least you are aware of your ego and that is better than not being aware.

I've been struggling with my ego for at least one month. Strangely, I've still managed to find quite a lot of peace by accepting the mess my ego has created. A part of me feels I'm giving myself opportunites to release some of the past, but at times my ego has taken over and created real unnecessary challenges.

I feel like I'm standing at the edge of a huge emotional cliff and if I jump I will be free, but my ego is going all out to stop me. I also feel a need to love my ego, but it sure is making it hard to do so.

Sorry for not adding anything of value.
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Old 05-29-2008, 09:17 PM
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That's a good analogy, oberlee.

Part of me feels silly because I am saying to myself (and here) That I KNOW my ego is doing things, but yet I am not stopping it. I guess that is what is confusing me. Why am I even DOING those things that I know are totally egoic based? Maybe next time I won't do them? UGH!!!

This is my first true look at the ego and I am just overwhelmed. I think part of it is feeling that frustration.... what's ego and what's ME? *I* am feeling downright crabby this week. Even my meditations are flighty at times... I am in the middle of a deep meditation and I want to scream at the dog to stop breathing so loud. LOL.

Ahhh.... just one of those weeks I guess.
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Old 05-29-2008, 09:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dancer View Post
Well, at least you are aware of your ego and that is better than not being aware.

I've been struggling with my ego for at least one month. Strangely, I've still managed to find quite a lot of peace by accepting the mess my ego has created. A part of me feels I'm giving myself opportunites to release some of the past, but at times my ego has taken over and created real unnecessary challenges.

I feel like I'm standing at the edge of a huge emotional cliff and if I jump I will be free, but my ego is going all out to stop me. I also feel a need to love my ego, but it sure is making it hard to do so.

Sorry for not adding anything of value.

You added value.... knowing we are not alone is great value!

I know how you feel, I really do!!!
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Old 05-30-2008, 12:49 AM
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You're not making your ego your personal problem are you? Cuz you know what that is.
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Old 05-30-2008, 01:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Angela View Post
You're not making your ego your personal problem are you? Cuz you know what that is.
Yeah, I totally am!!! And it is frustrating me! I am crabby at myself for being crabby. A terrible vicious cycle...
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Old 05-30-2008, 01:50 AM
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Well, don't worry. Crabbiness is next to godliness.
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Old 05-30-2008, 01:59 AM
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Originally Posted by Angela View Post
Well, don't worry. Crabbiness is next to godliness.
It is.. dang it I've been doing things all wrong. lol
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Old 05-30-2008, 02:28 AM
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Originally Posted by coLLege kid07 View Post
It is.. dang it I've been doing things all wrong. lol
Regret is next to godliness, too.
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Old 05-30-2008, 04:08 PM
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Change it.

See Choosing Our Emotions.

Easier said than done, but still possible.
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