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12-22-2011, 03:20 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 100
 |  My wife is pregnant!
I was going to post this on my other thread but I noticed Butterfly Woman has locked the thread for me while I have been away. My wife and I made love for the first time on the weekend and while I don’t feel comfortable sharing any sexually explicit details on a forum I will say it was amazing and worth the wait. I was very gentle with her and I probably asked her at least a dozen times if she was alright or if she wanted us to stop but she didn’t. Although I wanted us to make love on our honeymoon it wasn’t planned and I didn’t have any high expectations of it happening either. We have tried numerous times over the years to no avail but it was like everything fell into place when we were making out and it was the right time. It was my first time so I was nervous too but I thought about how much I loved this woman and how nervous she must have been too and it calmed my nerves. I wanted it to be special for her too and after we had finished she told me it was and it was everything she had hoped it would be. We made love again on Tuesday and both times were late at night when our daughter was asleep and we fell asleep holding each other like we usually do but it felt different. Hailey and I decided a few weeks ago when we finally did it I wouldn’t use protection and she did a pregnancy test this week and she told me she was pregnant. I couldn’t be happier and this is the best news she has ever told me  I have wanted Hailey to have a baby for a few years now and while we have Courtney who I love as my own a part of me has always felt like it wasn’t the same as having a biological kid which Hailey is going to have now. My wife has been a wonderful mother to Courtney and she wants to have two more kids so unless she has twins we will be trying again for another baby in a few years time. My question is how do I help her prepare for this? I want to be as supportive as I can during pregnancy and be the perfect husband. We haven’t told anybody apart from our daughter that she is pregnant because Hailey wants it to be a big surprise for our family and friends on Christmas which I will admit is difficult because I want to tell everybody. |
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12-22-2011, 03:23 AM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,157
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Congratulations, Gary. I don't have any good advice for you, but I'm glad all this has come out so well. I thought you might be interested to know that the forum will be closing down soon. The HUGE thread about it is here: Angela banned? It'll probably still be here for a few more days, though, so hopefully people can still help you. |
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12-22-2011, 03:25 AM
| #3 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Australia
Posts: 246
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Oh wow that is awesome Gazza, congratulations to you both, such wonderful news. I think most things you both will pick up and deal with along the way. The only thing that immediately springs to mind is to make sure you get a GP to refer you to an Obstetrician asap (if that's what you are going for ... or even a midwife) as the good ones can be fully booked for up to a year. |
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12-22-2011, 03:29 AM
| #5 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 100
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12-22-2011, 03:44 AM
| #8 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Australia
Posts: 246
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You will receive alot of useful information from medical professionals to guide you through pregnancy with your wife, but here are some suggestions for you if you'd like to err on the side of caution (though I'm sure Hailey would already be familiar with these): * Avoid salad in restaurants as some don't wash their lettuce (for risk of listeria, a bacteria that can be harmful to the unborn baby) * Some types of fish (mercury) * Handling cat faeces * Careful of deli meats (smoked ham, salami etc should be zapped in the microwave or cooked thoroughly to avoid listeria) * If Hailey hasn't already, then prenatal vitamins would be very good I'm sorry it's been over a year since I've had my child, so I've forgotten alot. I'd like to also suggest joining a pregnancy forum, as the members in those types of forums would be all over this stuff. |
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12-22-2011, 05:33 AM
| #11 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Down the infinite rabbit hole
Posts: 1,575
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Wow, that was quick!  Obviously a baby who really wants to be here and part of your family. I'm very happy for everyone. BTW, regarding the closed thread, it was always my intention to reopen it when you got back (unless you wanted it closed). I just didn't want you to have to come back to a bunch of posts to deal with. Bit too late for that now, though, of course.  If you've got a Facebook account, PM me with the details, please.  |
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12-22-2011, 12:33 PM
| #13 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 100
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Thanks again guys and thanks to all the members that helped me on my old thread. I joined this forum back in October with the intentions of helping my wife and while your advice has helped me and her a lot we still have a long journey ahead of us that is going to be full of bumps and turns but the one thing my wife can count on is I will always be there to catch her if she falls. Hailey has come a long way since she started seeing the therapist and has been willing to discuss more than she felt comfortable discussing before about her past relationships and being raped. Hailey has been reading the replies and she was thinking about joining and making some comments but since it will be closing down in a few days I told her it would be pretty pointless now. One thing this forum has helped me with is remembering not everybody out there in internet land is a weirdo and there are some good people out there that aren’t hackers. I think I mentioned on one of my posts on my previous thread that Hailey and I were both paid moderators on a country music channel’s forum for a few years but we got cyber bullied by a very disturbed individual and some of her messed up friends after we deleted her account. My wife become a bit of an introvert for a few months and refused to leave the house sometimes because of the threats they were making. It got really bad in 2009 and we had to get in contact with the AFP and it was ultimately closed down and some of the members that were friends with this person were arrested. We opened up our own forum where we were admins and only invited people to join that we knew but these idiots found us and started hacking us again. I had to replace numerous hard drives and it just wasn’t worth keeping open so we closed it along with our Facebook and Myspace accounts. This has been the first forum I have joined since then and it was nice to meet some helpful people on the internet for a change. I have been considering opening a new forum next year that focuses specifically on country rock and metal with Hailey and my best friend. I want to help Hailey with her singing too because I think she has a lot of talent and the whole world needs to see it. Now is probably not the best time since she is pregnant but I know this is a dream of hers and I don’t want it to go to waste. I appreciate you keeping my thread closed for me Butterfly Woman while I was away and if you want to reopen it you can but it would probably be a bit late now as you mentioned and we can continue everything from then on this thread until the forum closes down. Thanks for that anyway. I think the main question regarding the baby now is if it is going to be a boy or a girl. I’m actually hoping it is a girl but I would be just as happy if it turns out to be a boy. I’m not looking forward to changing the dirty nappies though but that is something I suppose I will get used to doing. I hope to stay in touch with all of the good members I have met on here Merry Christmas  |
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12-22-2011, 02:16 PM
| #15 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,133
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Congratulations Gary, to you and Hailey! You seem like a really sincere and down to earth kind of guy and I'm happy you and your wife have such great things going on in your lives: healing old wounds, marriage, love, sex, a baby on the way, and (above all) happiness. All the best to your family! |
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12-22-2011, 06:29 PM
| #16 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 63
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congrats Gary & Hailey! you've come so far!!! - but i'm confused. how is it possible to know this fast if one is pregnant? it's typically not detectable in the urine until after a missed menstrual cycle, or at least close to the next cycle; about 4-5 weeks after conception. * honestly, i'm beginning to wonder about the veracity of this whole story. of course, i acknowledge that anything i think comes from my own perception and interpretation. having said that, something is just 'off' to me about this whole thing.... years of very deep serious trauma sure seems to have been speedily resolved into a nice neat happily-ever-after package; and now a positive pregnancy test less than a week after the first sexual communion. i'm considering the possibility that this has been an elaborate contrivance of a very gifted storyteller, having us on. * Last edited by AllTogetherNow; 12-22-2011 at 07:02 PM. |
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12-22-2011, 09:25 PM
| #17 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Australia
Posts: 246
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There are some very sensitive home pregnancy tests available these days. Some can detect hcg in urine as early as 5-7 days after fertilisation. But implantation would have to occur first, typically 5-7 days after fertilisation.
Last edited by Curious cat; 12-23-2011 at 01:59 AM. |
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12-24-2011, 03:42 AM
| #19 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 100
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Hi guys I just wanted to say goodbye one last time before this forum was closed and thank you again for the replies. As for AlltogetherNow I can assure you I have better things to do with my life than waste my time making up stories for people on a forum. I will take your comment as a compliment though as I want to be a writer like Stephen King and Bret Easton Ellis. I was going to get my wife to join this site who may have been able to clear some things up for you but as it is closing down it would be pretty pointless now. I am not an expert on pregnancy (as I mentioned) but I know my cousin who saved herself for marriage knew she was pregnant less than a week after she got married too. Years of trauma have not been resolved as I mentioned on my previous post and there are still a lot of things we have to deal with. It took Hailey close to seven years to make love to me and she still is not entirely comfortable doing it yet and talked about this with me yesterday. We have only had sex twice and are not having numerous wild sex escapades or humping our like rabbits. Not that we are going to but you should get my example. Hailey is still dealing with a number of issues such as anger issues, her problems with males, being able to talk thoroughly about her tension etc. I hope to see some of you guys on other places in the future. |
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12-24-2011, 09:41 AM
| #21 (permalink) | |
| Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 22
| Quote:
I love reading about romance and true love Too bad my husband turned out to be an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ but I’m not giving up | |
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12-24-2011, 10:16 AM
| #22 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 40
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I've not heard of anyone getting a positive under 7 days after sex, it takes 4-12 days for implantation and 3 days for the HCG, given the minimum days for implantation and HCG detected would be 7 days after sex which isn't unheard of. If she tested positive on a test in less than 7 days the child wouldn't be yours. If more than 7 days than it could detect but for most women they don't get faint positives till about 10-14 days after sex since implantation varies for each person.
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12-24-2011, 10:39 AM
| #23 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 22
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I thought it sounded a little strange too. Maybe Hailey has made a mistake or she might just be telling Gary she is pregnant to keep him happy. The op said he didn\'t know much about pregnancy and I once knew a friend who lied to her husband about being pregnant |
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