Sex is not the enemy [NSFW]

[ssandra]

I just wanted to share this link. So many wonderful pictures and quotes, I wouldn't know which one to choose.


WARNING! EXPLICIT SEXUAL (Although in a very wonderful and fun-loving way) PICTURES: NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!!

sex is not the enemy

[ssandra]

Too many of us still believe that “self-respect” for a woman means chastity and modesty. If she’s wearing revealing clothing, enjoys attention, and maybe even likes sex outside of a committed monogamous relationship, we call her a “slut”—and accuse her of not respecting herself. Perhaps she does respect herself, perhaps she doesn’t. (Promiscuity is not perfectly correlated with low self-esteem, despite what a lot of pop psychologists tell you.) But in the end, it doesn’t matter. Women aren’t commodities whose value is based on their own fluctuating sense of self-worth.

[butterflyeffect]

My favourtie quote was about gay people. I agree, their sexuality is thier business and just my choices are mine.

"The message is: our sexuality is perfectly valid and none of your business, we offer you no excuses, and we are never going away."

[wanzulfikri]

Originally Posted by ssandra

I just wanted to share this link. So many wonderful pictures and quotes, I wouldn't know which one to choose.


WARNING! EXPLICIT SEXUAL (Although in a very wonderful and fun-loving way) PICTURES: NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!!

sex is not the enemy

I thought you are joking but WOOT! Pictures!

[Nimue]

Such a sweet, lovely collection! Thanks for sharing

[CroMagna]

I feel sort of weird living in a society where it's radical to say that I want my good-to-rub parts rubbed, that I want to choose who does it and how, and I'm not going to apologize for this. But it is. I guess I'm a revolutionary then.

Thanks for posting this Sandra!

[elucidate]

In reference to your #2 post Ssandra...

I've been dealing with this issue lately at work. The person I've been working for has been trying to instil "modest" dress codes into us to give the "right" impression that we are not "easy" but rather "elegant ladies", to try and clean up the place as some men go there thinking it's a brothel when it's not.

Even though I do dress elegantly, I find it a little funny that women have this put on them to avoid giving off the wrong impression to men who are there to receive a sensual service.

Those men will perceive a woman dressed in more revealing clothes as someone who will "obviously" have much looser boundaries, so they can get away with a lot more...which is clearly distorted.

They like to see this, and will pick the woman who does dress this way, but at the same time they will judge the woman as somehow lower in status for doing this? Doesn't that say more about the men? If they pick someone they perceive to be lacking in self-respect, then isn't that also announcing that they don't respect themselves as well? If they did, they would go for the woman who is more modestly dressed according to their logic.

I'm just thinking out loud, from a work perspective, and I know this goes on in many other contexts, but it's interesting how there are these little contradictions and hypocrisies that go with those judgements.

One woman there hates the job, and really should leave. She has large breasts, and the guys always grab them, which she hates, but is too timid to stand up to them firmly. This woman will dress in a way that accentuates her boobs because she knows it will bring her more tips, but at the same time it also gives them the impression that it's ok to just grab at her, because she is showing them so therefore it's ok to.

What I find weird is when women wear revealing clothes and then get mad when men look at them?? What's that about?

[C33]

Thanks for sharing.

[Alice Hive]

I love it!

[Albalida]

Originally Posted by elucidate

They like to see this, and will pick the woman who does dress this way, but at the same time they will judge the woman as somehow lower in status for doing this? Doesn't that say more about the men? If they pick someone they perceive to be lacking in self-respect, then isn't that also announcing that they don't respect themselves as well?

Well put! Whenever I hear, "dress like a slut and you'll be treated like one" I'm tempted to retort "TREAT SLUTS BETTER."

What I find weird is when women wear revealing clothes and then get mad when men look at them?? What's that about?

Might be that the woman in question sees that they've crossed the line over just looking and gone into ogling, and don't take that for granted as the nature of the beast, but something quite disrespectful that ought to be called out as such. On a slight tangent:

Stop Street Harassment
The picture that the blogger refers to in the first paragraph won't load, for some reason, and in case it's not because of my browser: it's a caption of a guy saying "Upset because strangers on the street are shouting how hot you are? I wish women would do that to me!"

[Nimue]

Well, the only real sluts for me are the ones who play with peoples' feelings and make fool of guys who love them. It's not actually about sex.
What the common mind often sees in "slutty-dressed" women is ladies who care for plain sex more than something deeper. It's a matter of what kind of message people perceive. (Also, to leave nothing to imagination isn't believed to be the best strategy for long-term attachments)

And as for wether I like being called sexy by people around: damn right I like it! (as long as what guys say isn't something vulgar)
Once I did whistle to a cute guy (just for feministic reasons and fun, I was with a friend of mine and we were talking about the very same thing) I loved how his expression changed from "what the hell" to "omg awesome"