How to be unique

[wanzulfikri]

I had spent some time thinking about it and I found out that people are tied to norms. As if the norms of life (culture,social,etc) are a MUST in life and you can't defy them.

I have this mindset that if anyone wants to be unique, don't think that everything in life is a MUST.

You don't need to wear FORMAL attire to meeting - it's a norm only.

You don't need to wear NICE clothes when you're out - it's also a norm.

It's not that I am hating self-image, it's just that I sometimes feel that we are too restrictive with all the perceptions that comes from others.

When will it be OUR life if we live according to others.

[Traikan]

The English language is a norm too.

Or perhaps I mean "Zaetoj fdjklam owotoop." Fight the power!

You have to pick your battles. Is it really worth it to you to argue against wearing formal attire at a meeting? Or grooming yourself well every day?

Or would your time be better spent breaking free of norms about self-expression, genuine contribution of value or openness and honesty?

[wanzulfikri]

Lol, ya, maybe it isn't worth it. That's just an example really.

Your right, honesty and self-expression. That's the words I am finding actually.

Thanks!

[Brutha]

Basically you want to be unique but at the same time you don't want to be unique enough that you will be treated differently.

As if the norms of life (culture,social,etc) are a MUST in life and you can't defy them.

That may be true in Malaysia but it isn't true in the West.
Steve Jobs had no problem to go on stage with a sweater.
In social situations there are people in the PUA community who wear really weird stuff and still manage to have succesful social interactions.

[AllTogetherNow]

there is no "how to be" unique. you already ARE unique. Each of us is.

Unique means "like no other" -- it doesn't mean 'non-conforming', or "more interesting" than something else.

There is no 'degree' of uniqueness - something cannot be 'more unique' or 'most unique". It is either one of a kind - or it's not.

and you ARE 'one of a kind'. Each human being is.

I fully agree with you that conforming to norms is not a "must"; and there's no need to restrict ourselves to behaving solely according to others' judgement or perceptions.

Some people conform and are fine with it,and many do not; either choice is fine, but even people who DO conform to norms - are still unique individuals.

because 'actions you do' in life, is separate and distinct from whether or not you are unique; no matter what norms you do or don't do - you are still one-of-a-kind.

so regardless, you're always free to pick and choose which norms you accept, or not. That's just a matter of what you feel comfortable with; it doesn't affect your uniqueness. I'm pretty non-conforming and i don't care. LOL. i have nothing to prove to anyone, and quite used to being perceived as a non-conforming odd duck, LOL.

yet sometimes i also choose to follow norms, when it's useful to me or serves a purpose. Either way it doesn't matter, the point is we each have that choice - and we're each unique no matter which norms we accept, reject, do, or don't do.

so you don't have to think about 'how to be' unique - you already are, regardless of whether you follow norms or not. there's no one else like YOU, on this planet.

[raykilleen]

All humans are unique, we just act otherwise.