Non-conforming

[stopwatch]

Right...

All my school friends that I used to be friends with are still all friends. I tend to move on with my life and my own thing but everyone else seems stuck in a rut or just doing the same thing.

They all do look up to what I do but they don't ever tend to show support - I'm a non-conformer and only have one other friend who is like this to my extent.

I have no problem getting women, and recently I have been meeting with women who have my same level of thinking - however, I feel like I shouldn't be in a relationship as it could detriment where my plans in life are heading. I'm not sure why I think that however!

Most successful people have relationships with one women, who seem to keep them grounded and on focus. I feel like if I have one, they will take my time away or make me do things I don't want to do. But I am lacking support, especially because my immediate family just don't get it either...

So, the question I am asking you is:

Is someone more prone to success and happiness while in a relationship?

Why do I feel the urge to have a relationship with someone because I can't relate to my friends as much any more?

[James81]

If you have ever been stuck in traffic...had to "take a number"....or waited in line....

If you have ever received a high school diploma, taken a job, and pay your bills....

If you sleep, ****, piss, eat, and have sex....

You are NOT, I repeat, NOT a non-conformer. You are just someone with an inflated ego.

This has been a public service announcement from 81 Industries.

[stopwatch]

That's that one out of the when then James

I wouldn't say non-conformer but in comparison to my early-20 raving (do what ever they tell me to do, because I'm ketamine cool) peers, it seems that way

[James81]

Originally Posted by stopwatch

That's that one out of the when then James

I wouldn't say non-conformer but in comparison to my early-20 raving (do what ever they tell me to do, because I'm ketamine cool) peers, it seems that way

That was me dancing on my soapbox.

I don't think any of us are so different that we could label ourselves as non-conformers.

In fact, giving yourself the label of "non-conformer" is actually conforming.

[stopwatch]

Originally Posted by James81

That was me dancing on my soapbox.

I don't think any of us are so different that we could label ourselves as non-conformers.

In fact, giving yourself the label of "non-conformer" is actually conforming.

Very true re: labelling!

What is it with being young and just doing what everyone else does? No one seems to strive any more - I don't want to hear complaints about credit card debt, problems paying the mortgage, unhappy relationships and bad health when we all turn 35

What do we need more of James?

[WisdomDome]

There's never a cut-and-paste formula for happiness. I know some people that feel like they need to be in relationships to be happy, and I know other people who are just fine without being in a relationship.

What makes you happy will make you happy, so do it. If you don't want a relationship, you have your entire life to change your mind and decide to change your life to whatever will make you happy then.

Don't look externally for happiness, as there are a lot of people who fake happiness. Look within yourself and you'll know what truly makes you happy.

[ns123]

The awesome thing about happiness is that it is different for different people. Of course, you know this already.

So for me, being an relationship makes me happy/better, being a mom makes me happy/better, etc. But for some one who doesn't want the same things, that's not true. So they should not do these things.

And they should not feel guilty or lesser because of it. I don't feel lesser just because I'm not an accountant and I don't enjoy accounting. So why should I feel lesser or guilty or wrong if I'm not married and don't really enjoy being married? (for example)

Discover what you enjoy. Don't apologize for your choices. If you think a relationship will weigh you down, you're probably not ready for one. That doesn't mean you're "wrong" and you shouldn't feel guilty for it! It doesn't mean you're lesser to any degree. I'm not ready to get my haircut yet, does that make me lesser than the dude in the barber's chair?

It sounds as if you are wanting a deeper connection with some one. If you are, the good news is, you can start building that connection any time you want. You have 100% power to do that (to quote my favorite life coach).

The how is up to you.

[CosmoMan]

Hi Stopwatch!

Earlier on I have congratulated Darika for sharing her sexual lifestyle dream experience with all of us here on the forum. Now, I also want to congratulate to you too because you've confidently persisted on just being yourself so that you've saved your natural individuality and your life's purpose and happiness from any potential external bad influences and judgement.

What you're feeling and experiencing right now is I dare to say an evilish temptation call of not only your peers but probably near or even over 90% of people on the entire planet who all more or less panickly succumbed following the masses and at the same time suppressing or "killing" their true inner individual dreams just for being afraid of getting in the danger zone of being labelled as "black sheep" in case they decided to behave the way that's different from the one of the disheartened and low-spirited masses.

So, once again congrats to you too. By the way, you really must be proud of yourself by unselfishly sharing your own life successes with the rest of us here among whom I guess most of us would like to get where you are right now.
Personally I am currently working on brushing up my dating skills through overcoming hopefully the last little bits of approach and sexual anxiety when approaching some very hot looking girls and women everywhere and anytime everyday thus wanting to bring up my natural self confidence at dating on its place. Because a little bit like yourself, I also see my sort of purpose and full happiness on earth by simply and truly enjoying myself in the company of many beautiful girls and women. In other words, I simply don't see myself happy at all when it comes to committing myself to a relationship because it's simply not my thing at all.

Well, if you do have any so called "pick up artists" tips for single men, I'd be glad and grateful if you decide to share it with us here. In advance many thanks. And, by the way, don't be shy to suggest any of the so called "sexual banters" or "dirty sex talk" lines and how exactly you do them when wanting to directly and openly get into a sexual communication with a girl who you've recently met, for example.

Once again, many thanks for everything.

Keep on having lots of fun!!

[hamix]

Conformity is a buzzword that doesn't exist in the real world.

Also, people outgrow friendships all the time.