What do you think of spouses who call each other mom/dad etc.

[ChrisCountryGirl]

Let's just say, I know of a couple that does this. It's embarrassing to me to hear them call each that, especially if there's other people around. It's just creepy and grosses me out too when I hear it. I don't understand why spouses call each other mom/dad in front of children. I think it's also inappropriate.

[dcaldwell]

While my wife and I haven't done that in front of our children, I can certainly see how it can happen. When I've said to my kid, "mommy wants you do do x", then turn around and call to my wife using her given name, it's confused the little ones more than once. They simply don't know us by any other name, and think it's funny that we have other names. Imagine if you were randomly called by two different names. I suppose parents engaged in a highly interactive family may opt for common names all around to eliminate confusion and foster inclusion.

[thestral]

What's weird about it? My parents still do it when I come over, and I'm 24. Like my mom and I will be in the kitchen, my dad setting the table and my mom will say "Dad, time to get the ham out of the oven." They don't do it in public, or when we have casual guests over. But I know lots of people that do this.

[Lychee]

lol I know that some people who go out call each other by "mami" and "papi" I think it's kind of cute but having a husband/wife call each other "mom" and "dad" is kind of unusual...

[Angela]

Originally Posted by ChrisCountryGirl

Let's just say, I know of a couple that does this. It's embarrassing to me to hear them call each that, especially if there's other people around. It's just creepy and grosses me out too when I hear it. I don't understand why spouses call each other mom/dad in front of children. I think it's also inappropriate.

It's not their problem. Consenting adults can call each other any endearment they choose, no matter how saccharine. And kids are smart enough to figure it out all the various names people have for their mom and dad.

[Lallymac]

Calling each other mom and dad possibly starts when children arrive and new parents are enjoying the thrill of their new roles.
Lallymac

[CoachChar]

My parents do it, when their 3 kids or 4 grandchildren are around. I honestly don't know what they call each other when I'm not around because I'm not around to hear them talking to each other!

I like it. Clearly my "Mommy" and "Daddy" like it too. 36 years and counting...

[Angela]

Char, are they Mommy and Daddy Slaughter? (or is that your married name).

Remember, without you, there is no "laughter"!

[CoachChar]

Slaughter is my husband's family name. It's as good a name as any I guess, but sometimes I wish I'd not changed my name when I married. I was only 22 at the time and I didn't take the decision seriously.

It's funny what you say about 'laughter', Angela. When I was in the military people would balk at my name because I was a medic and part of my job was to draw blood from patients at the base hospital. They'd say, "With a name like Slaughter, I don't want you using any needles on me!" Gimme a break, they were TINY needles... I could see if I'd walked around all day with a sidearm or rifle...

Anyways, years later, a friendly customer service person told me, "When I see your name, I don't think about the killing. I see an S followed by laughter." She made my day!

[shesaboutspirit]

Yep, when we make babies together it's easy to refer to each other that way. I only did it when talking to the kids though, and the rest of the time, he was "Honey". We've been divorced for eight years now and he still calls me Mommy to the kids. It took us a while to drop the Honey...because it had become our names. Habits, you know? When I would call him by his real name, he thought he was in trouble

I consciously changed over to calling him "your Dad" to the kids because I come from an adult child family and have realized that this is an important distinction for me in healing this dynamic.

My Mom, also an adult child of course...refers to my ex and both my brothers and my deceased father as Daddy... Yes, I understand the creepy feeling you mentioned at the start of this thread. For me though, it's because I have a button about this with her...so that's what I work through. Part of me wishes she would finally grow up...but that's my problem. Understand?

blessings,
Pam/Mommy

[madgeylou]

ChrisCountryGirl, how many forums are you going to post this question on?

I've already seen it on another ... this must REALLY bother you to post about it twice on 2 different forums?

Or are you viral marketing "my name is not mommy" t-shirts or something?

[CoachChar]

I spent nearly 8 years in east King County, Washington. For the first 6 years we bounced around a lot, renting apartments in Bellevue, Redmond, Kirkland, and Issaquah. Finally, in 2004 we purchased a townhome in Issaquah Highlands. We moved to Jersey last summer to be closer to family.

My best friend lives in Kirkland right near the 70th PL Park & Ride off I-405. She's got a sweet view of the lake too... It's so beautiful in Western WA. I really miss it.
Char

[shesaboutspirit]

Hi Char,

Look me up next time you're in town, we'll do coffee

Pam

PS: Do you call your spouse Daddy?

[Scott H Young]

Young kids will often pick up the names you use for each other. I have some relatives that when their kids were little used to call their parents Vicki/Andy as their actual names. That's probably the reason for using the mom/dad nicknames when kids are really young. After that it might just stick as a habit.

[CoachChar]

Originally Posted by shesaboutspirit

Hi Char,

Look me up next time you're in town, we'll do coffee

Pam

PS: Do you call your spouse Daddy?

It's not a kinky thing... I'm practicing in case we decide to have children!
Just kidding... It's just the two of us and I call him by his name, or some term of endearment such as "Honey" or "Baby".

We do have 3 nieces and a nephew, 3 of whom are under the age of 10. We often refer to each other as "Auntie" and "Unlce J." when talking to the kids or when addressing each other in their presence.