Conversation with Strangers

[PerDev]

What are the simple technique can be used when conversation with stranger

What are the specific questions we can ask or

what are the best way to break the ice?

what are the ways to be comfortable with stranger instantly?


I think

1. Matching and Mirroring
2. asking Who, what, how question
3. shifting out beliefs


What are the most effective one practically ?

As I am not rating my self good score in it .. Asking somebody who is master in it or atleast very used to it.

[PerDev]

Also let us know if we should follow different tools for different type of people?

Originally Posted by PerDev

What are the simple technique can be used when conversation with stranger

What are the specific questions we can ask or

what are the best way to break the ice?

what are the ways to be comfortable with stranger instantly?


I think

1. Matching and Mirroring
2. asking Who, what, how question
3. shifting out beliefs


What are the most effective one practically ?

As I am not rating my self good score in it .. Asking somebody who is master in it or atleast very used to it.

[Johnny Skosnik]

Practice. Set a goal of "this week I'll start a conversation with X strangers". Each week increase X a bit. It's like an exercise routine: start slowly and gradually up the weights and repetitions.

Some tips: store lines are good. Most people are bored and happy to talk to someone for a diversion. And if you do bomb horribly, chances are you'll never see them again. If you're in a fast-food places, say to the person next to you "Say, I usually get the same thing each time. I'm looking to mix it up, what are you getting?" Clothing store? "Hey, those clothes look nice. You have good taste!" Convenience store, person has beer and snacks? "Hee, looks like you're on your way to a party!" DVD rental? "Oh, that movie looks good, what’s that about?" You get the idea.

[James81]

I have a habit where, if a stranger makes eye contact with me I'll say "How's it going?" or "How're you doing?" and then I gauge their response to see if it's conversation worthy. If the response is "Good" then I'll consider that they aren't interested in conversation and go about my business. If they ask how I'm doing in return, I'll pitch something new back at them (something having to do with our surroundings) and then gauge their response again.

The key to talking to strangers is knowing WHO to talk to and who doesn't want to be bothered. So long as they keep pitching back something that has response value, I'll keep going, delving a bit deeper with each statement.

Most of the time, you'll discover, that strangers are willing to share a few lines of convo with you but that's it. Other times, though, you'll find that people are willing to take it a bit further.

Mirroring, hammering them with questions, etc. all sound good on paper but for the most part are useless in authentic conversation. The best advice I can give you is to pretend like you are in a tennis match. Volley the "ball" (conversation) back and forth based on the responses you get. If you get a response that you don't think can be "volleyed" then you know not to pursue the conversation further.

[Rose of Cairo]

I am very used to talking to strangers, I do it all the time and I love it! Sometimes they start talking to me, sometimes I start talking to them.

How do I break the ice? By saying whatever I feel like saying in that moment. Actually, I usually start talking to them because there is something I feel like telling them to begin with. (Sometimes that is just "Hello! *smile*" though) I find it weird to want to talk to someone if you don't have anything to say to them anyway.

I don't ask any specific questions and don't use any techniques. Techniques are unauthentic. They also keep you stuck in your head wondering what you should say next, and prevent you from a) being spontaneous and b) connecting emotionally. Strangers like spontaneity and emotional connection though.

I usually feel instantly comfortable with them and they do with me. Some people even tell me about very private things after just five minutes of conversation. I think the reason for that simply is my mindset. When you have empowering beliefs about yourself, others and communication, talking with strangers becomes very natural and easy.

[Tanja]

Originally Posted by PerDev

What are the simple technique can be used when conversation with stranger

I don't use any techniques. Usually I say something about the immediate surroundings, situations, something neutral (Do you know if.../ How long.../ Are you here for/ Nice weather ..) Very often the conversation progresses to other topics as well.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

Some people even tell me about very private things after just five minutes of conversation.

This happens to me a lot as well Especially with elderly people, and usually on public transport. It's fascinating really
There are interesting situations, just the other day:
Man: You look familiar. Are you ''John's'' daughter, from...?
Tanja: No, John is not my father.
Man: Yes, yes he is. (Here he tells me the story of how he met my father John, who is not my father )

[marito]

Everyone has great ideas. And the truth is simple: it's just practice. Go out and speak. Do it and make it a habit. Then will it work. There's no secret technique or strategy. You could use prepared lines to be more confident (and feel less nervous in the moment) but it all ends in just DOING. =)

[PerDev]

I think from your all suggestion below mentioned ideas will help .

1. Being authentic
2. Adopting more empoweing belief. Like all are part of me, and mos people are friendly.
3. Practice
4. Being more Aware and conscious
5. Having more energy
6. thinking from giving value perspective
7. Try to make it as fun as possible.
8. and having general contents (like matching mirroring, some questions bank, some common info abound surronding etc.)

Do let us know if i am missing something important.