| |||||||
| Social & Relationships Social skills, friends, dating, sex, seduction, monogamy, polyamory, marriage, alternative relationships, soul mates, parenting, children, family life, education |
|
Welcome to the Personal Development for Smart People Forums, the place for lively, intelligent discussion of all personal growth issues -- physical, mental, financial, social, emotional, spiritual, and more. You're currently viewing as a guest, which gives you limited read-only access. By joining our free community, you'll be able to post your own messages, access many members-only features, see the new messages posted since your last visit, and of course remove this header message. Registration is fast, simple, and free, so please join today. If you arrived here from a search engine, you may want to explore the main site first, which includes hundreds of deep and insightful articles on a variety of personal development topics. |
| View Poll Results: Is it a sin to love a friend(of opposite sex)??? | |||
| Yes, it is a sin |     | 0 | 0% |
| No, it is not a sin |    | 11 | 100.00% |
| Voters: 11. You may not vote on this poll | |||
 |
| | Thread Tools | Display Modes |
10-22-2009, 08:17 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 13
 |  Is it right to fall in love with a friend(of opposite sex) ????
Is it rite to propose to a person(of opposite sex) who has been a friend of mine for so long...??? the person was a great friend of mine for the past 3 years... i have done project and all sorts of college activities along with that person... Till a few months back i didn't have any idea of loving that person.... But suddenly i have started feeling that why shouldn't the person be my life partner???... Because I feel I am at my best and at home when i am with that person.... I feel that the person also likes me... Am I doing any injustice to friendship or am I spoiling the sanctity and chastity of Friendship???? Because one of my other friends(who is a friend to us both) severed ties with me stating that i have spoiled the meaning of the very word "FRIENDSHIP" when i told him that i am in love with that person... I was very much depressed on seeing him leaving me.... Is it a sin to love a friend???..... |
|      |
|
10-22-2009, 12:02 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Moderator Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Berlin, Germany
Posts: 5,004
| 
Say Bob loves Alice. Alice and Corel are friends. Bob doesn't tell Alice that he loves her but Bob tells Corel that he loves Alice. That puts Corel into a bad position because she has to either without information from Alice or create an akward situation by telling her about how Bob loves her and doesn't know whether to tell her. A better way would be if Bob would speak to Alice directly and try to intensify their relationship step by step. Then he either hit a step where Alice doesn't want to go along and should accept that decision or he Alice starts to become his girlfriend.
__________________ I am always open for feedback on my posts. If your feedback would go offtopic feel free to send me a Personal Message. My posts generally don't contain medical or legal advice, if you have a problem seek the opinion of an expert Talking about this in terms of “bad news” or “bad judgment by business leaders” seems archaic. It’s like describing World War One as “a serious diplomatic concern.” Bruce Sterling about the financial crisis. |
|
| |
|
10-22-2009, 12:11 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Where Living and Loving and Laughing are written into the Constitution
Posts: 3,011
|
Why would it be a sin??? In any religion?? I can understand if he she or he would be a spouse of an also close friend... or if the friend is a spouse of your sibling... or something on these lines... but just a friend!!??? 
__________________ Life shrinks and grows proportionally to the courage of the one who lives it. |
| |
|
10-23-2009, 05:24 AM
| #5 (permalink) |
| Moderator  Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 3,148
|
It's perfectly all right to fall in love with a good friend. I've had friends whom I wasn't attracted to initially and then our friendship became deeper, or something changed and I started feeling attracted to her. It's perfectly ok, and it does happen to some of us. When you notice the change, it's best to let the other person know. Otherwise, the friendship becomes a lie imo if you aren't upfront about how you feel toward your friend. Whether the other person reciprocate their feeling or not, it's better to be upfront when you have notice this shift in you and you'll feel relieved. Here's a good way to do this that Steve mentions: Initiating Relationships with Openness, Honesty, and Directness |
|
| |
|
10-23-2009, 07:40 PM
| #6 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Southern California
Posts: 548
|
If you're going to live in fear of what other people think about you, you're going to be angry and miserable your entire life. If you love her, start getting busy 
__________________ http://jesselovesyou.com/ |
|
| |
|
10-25-2009, 08:33 AM
| #7 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Where Living and Loving and Laughing are written into the Constitution
Posts: 3,011
| Quote:
__________________ Life shrinks and grows proportionally to the courage of the one who lives it. | |
|
| |
|
10-25-2009, 02:45 PM
| #9 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 555
|
First of all, I don't think it is every wrong to fall in love with someone. Love isn't something that you choose to do, it just happens. Second, I don't see where the gender makes any difference in the discussion. The OP specifies opposite sex, but the same logic would apply for same sex friendships. I would suggest not jumping to thoughts of making the friend a life partner before exploring a romantic relationship first. Even if your friend is interested in a romantic relationship, you may find that it isn't quite what you expected. You may decide that you'd rather have the person as a friend for life, than has a romantic partner for life.
__________________ Random thoughts from Some Random Guy |
|
| |
|
10-25-2009, 09:29 PM
| #10 (permalink) | |
| Moderator Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 3,148
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
| Bookmarks |
| Tags |
| loving a friend |
« Previous Thread
|
Next Thread »
| Thread Tools | |
| Display Modes | |
Linear Mode
| |
Similar Threads | ||||
| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| Why don't I fall in love? | Luximinus | Emotional Mastery | 20 | 09-28-2009 03:57 AM |
| Getting Ex to Fall in Love with Me again | tiramisu17 | Social & Relationships | 3 | 02-06-2008 03:25 PM |
| How to Fall out of Love (or never in love so quickly) | jamestl2 | Emotional Mastery | 61 | 09-16-2007 03:02 PM |
| Cant fall in love | Bender.PUA | Emotional Mastery | 20 | 12-05-2006 04:45 AM |
All times are GMT. The time now is 08:12 AM.