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MidasGirl · 10-22-2009, 05:41 AM

My boyfriend (38) gets annoyed when I refer to him as "my boyfriend". He figures he's too old for that, plus after being together 3 years he feels "boyfriend" sounds too casual. He doesn't like being introduced as "my boyfriend"

Well, a lot of times I refer to him as "my man" but I find that too "street" and only use it in informal situations. I also say "my guy" but I feel same way about that too. He refers to me as "My Lady" when in formal situations and "My Woman" in regular situations. I feel that men are at an advantage cuz "my lady" sounds just fine, especially when referring to someone you are serious with but not married to; but there is no equivalent for us women to use. I have asked him to suggest what he wants to be referenced as but he's come up with zero suggestions so far.

So, what do you call them? My man-friend? My gentleman? Or should I just tell him to be satisfied I give him enough sex and quit moaning about labels?

Michelle · 10-22-2009, 06:44 AM

Why get stuck on gender?

My Partner is what I would use.

aelle · 10-22-2009, 09:05 AM

My bed warmer
The boy ("The boy and I are going away for the weekend")
My lover
That guy I sleep with (if people get too nosy about our plans for the future)

And in "formal" situations:
My boyfriend or my partner.

Tanja · 10-22-2009, 09:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aelle

My bed warmer

I'd also say my partner.

marinik · 10-22-2009, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tanja

I'd also say my partner.

Yup!!! Right as always!

SomeRandomGuy · 10-22-2009, 11:41 AM

Personally, I think terms like "my man" and "my woman" sound very possessive. A non-gender specific label like "partner" might be a good option as Michelle suggested. Another option might be to just avoid labels completely. Since the two of you have been together for 3 years, it seems likely that most people you know well will recognize him by name. When introducing him to others, is it necessary to explain what your personal relationship with him is?

Brutha · 10-22-2009, 12:21 PM

Partner
Fiancé
Husband

SelfAwareWorld · 10-22-2009, 12:54 PM

Try reverse psychology. Introduce him by his first name. "This is Todd (Fred,Mike...)" and see how he reacts.

I'm sure he won't like that either, but it might be fun to see what he does.

TheColonel · 10-23-2009, 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SelfAwareWorld

I'm sure he won't like that either, but it might be fun to see what he does.

That's interesting. I was thinking the same thing.

IFeelGood · 10-23-2009, 03:33 AM

how about something endearing like my honey or my sweetie

dsc · 10-23-2009, 03:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IFeelGood

how about something endearing like my honey or my sweetie

Most guys don't like overly 'cutsie-pie' stuff like this in public.

IFeelGood · 10-23-2009, 06:46 AM

dsc, are you a man saying this?

rocksupreme · 10-23-2009, 11:16 AM

You could just use his name. Leave it to others to figure out what your relationship is (as if it were their business) for themselves.

spirit4711 · 10-23-2009, 11:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MidasGirl

So, what do you call them? My man-friend? My gentleman? Or should I just tell him to be satisfied I give him enough sex and quit moaning about labels?

[tongue in cheek]
My stud
My sextoy
The milkman / postal worker / repair guy

My surrogate husband
The in-between guy
My gigolo
[/tongue in cheek]

What problems people can make! (Your BF, not you.) 'My partner' is neutral.

missing · 10-23-2009, 01:24 PM

i despise the term "partner" in this sense. It sounds like you are referring to a business associate rather than a lover. Unfortunately I don't have an alternative, though I don't see the problem with saying "my man" (or my woman/lady). People who think it's too "possessive" are taking it way too literally.

Personally, I wouldn't care what I got called, so long as the relationship was good.

dsc · 10-23-2009, 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IFeelGood

dsc, are you a man saying this?

Yes

Tanja · 10-23-2009, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tanja

I'd also say my partner.

To add to the list:
companion,
significant other

ar81 · 10-23-2009, 02:32 PM

In any negotiation, if a proposal is not acceptable, a counter proposal is needed. How does he suggest you to call him?

MidasGirl · 10-25-2009, 12:20 AM

Thanks everyone........this was supposed to be lighthearted and I'm glad to see most of you kept it so.

@ar81 -- good suggestion.

Maybe other half? Spousal equivalent?

I think S/O sounds really good......I'll probably go with that.

spirit4711 · 10-25-2009, 09:26 AM

How about: 'Oh, he's just a guy, I forgot his name.'

Gene · 10-26-2009, 04:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spirit4711

How about: 'Oh, he's just a guy, I forgot his name.'

I like it. I was going to suggest love slave, he will either love it or blush and maybe both.

StarieEyed · 10-26-2009, 10:15 PM

I just say "Hi this is Frank" and ppl get the idea. No need to explain!

Daffy Duck · 11-03-2009, 09:45 PM

I'm a little late on this, but I like to say, "This is [girlfriend's name], the woman who puts up with me on a daily basis."

seeker5 · 11-03-2009, 11:57 PM

One possible option if he doesn't like the term "boyfriend"

IFeelGood · 11-04-2009, 06:31 AM

Hi I'd like to introduce you to Caveman <insert name>

or
what Gene said... Love Slave <insert name>

brendannz · 11-04-2009, 08:43 AM

Your dawg

Or initial-Dawg.. (I get called B-Dawg sometimes and find it a good name)

spirit4711 · 11-04-2009, 09:11 AM

'He who cleans the dishes'

'Mr. Goodbar'

'This is Superman - incognito, of course.'

'My main source of frustration and joy'

'Another Martian'

Daffy Duck · 11-04-2009, 04:38 PM

I know what Spirit calls his man friend.

"Hi, this is my better half; Daffy Duck."

spirit4711 · 11-04-2009, 04:41 PM

And Daffy introduces me as 'my spiritual half'

Daffy Duck · 11-04-2009, 04:52 PM

Sometimes, but I usually introduce you as the guy "I like to rub down with baby oil and spank."

Hope you don't mind me saying that on here, babe.

10-22-2009, 05:41 AM	#1 (permalink)
MidasGirl Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Beautiful SoCal Posts: 880	What do you call your man-friend? My boyfriend (38) gets annoyed when I refer to him as "my boyfriend". He figures he's too old for that, plus after being together 3 years he feels "boyfriend" sounds too casual. He doesn't like being introduced as "my boyfriend" Well, a lot of times I refer to him as "my man" but I find that too "street" and only use it in informal situations. I also say "my guy" but I feel same way about that too. He refers to me as "My Lady" when in formal situations and "My Woman" in regular situations. I feel that men are at an advantage cuz "my lady" sounds just fine, especially when referring to someone you are serious with but not married to; but there is no equivalent for us women to use. I have asked him to suggest what he wants to be referenced as but he's come up with zero suggestions so far. So, what do you call them? My man-friend? My gentleman? Or should I just tell him to be satisfied I give him enough sex and quit moaning about labels? __________________ Seize the moment! Last edited by MidasGirl; 10-22-2009 at 05:44 AM.

10-22-2009, 06:44 AM	#2 (permalink)
Michelle Moderator Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Nidau, Switzerland Posts: 1,167	Why get stuck on gender? My Partner is what I would use. __________________ "It is with flexibility and ease that I see all sides of an issue. There are endless ways of doing things and seeing things. I am safe." Louise L. Hay If what you read resonates with you, feel free to friend me on Facebook

10-22-2009, 09:05 AM	#3 (permalink)
aelle Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: France - Japan - Korea Posts: 740	My bed warmer The boy ("The boy and I are going away for the weekend") My lover That guy I sleep with (if people get too nosy about our plans for the future) And in "formal" situations: My boyfriend or my partner. __________________ read, look and listen to aelle around the world my notebooks and paper stuff

10-22-2009, 11:41 AM	#6 (permalink)
SomeRandomGuy Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 538	Personally, I think terms like "my man" and "my woman" sound very possessive. A non-gender specific label like "partner" might be a good option as Michelle suggested. Another option might be to just avoid labels completely. Since the two of you have been together for 3 years, it seems likely that most people you know well will recognize him by name. When introducing him to others, is it necessary to explain what your personal relationship with him is? __________________ Random thoughts from Some Random Guy

10-22-2009, 12:21 PM	#7 (permalink)
Brutha Moderator Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Berlin, Germany Posts: 4,979	Partner Fiancé Husband __________________ I am always open for feedback on my posts. If your feedback would go offtopic feel free to send me a Personal Message. My posts generally don't contain medical or legal advice, if you have a problem seek the opinion of an expert Talking about this in terms of “bad news” or “bad judgment by business leaders” seems archaic. It’s like describing World War One as “a serious diplomatic concern.” Bruce Sterling about the financial crisis.

10-22-2009, 12:54 PM	#8 (permalink)
SelfAwareWorld Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 29	Reverse Psychology Try reverse psychology. Introduce him by his first name. "This is Todd (Fred,Mike...)" and see how he reacts. I'm sure he won't like that either, but it might be fun to see what he does. __________________ Jake Cameron SelfAwareWorld.com

10-23-2009, 03:33 AM	#10 (permalink)
IFeelGood Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 213	how about something endearing like my honey or my sweetie

10-23-2009, 06:46 AM	#12 (permalink)
IFeelGood Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 213	dsc, are you a man saying this?

10-23-2009, 11:16 AM	#13 (permalink)
rocksupreme Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Osaka Posts: 354	You could just use his name. Leave it to others to figure out what your relationship is (as if it were their business) for themselves. __________________ Andy Fossett \| Find a Job in Japan

10-23-2009, 01:24 PM	#15 (permalink)
missing Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Portland, OR Posts: 384	i despise the term "partner" in this sense. It sounds like you are referring to a business associate rather than a lover. Unfortunately I don't have an alternative, though I don't see the problem with saying "my man" (or my woman/lady). People who think it's too "possessive" are taking it way too literally. Personally, I wouldn't care what I got called, so long as the relationship was good. __________________ "I've been around the world several times, and now, only banality interests me. On this trip I've hunted it with the relentlessness of a bounty hunter"

10-23-2009, 02:32 PM	#18 (permalink)
ar81 Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,876	In any negotiation, if a proposal is not acceptable, a counter proposal is needed. How does he suggest you to call him? __________________ Freedom - When people learn to embrace criticism about politicians, since politicians are just employees like you and me.

10-25-2009, 12:20 AM	#19 (permalink)
MidasGirl Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Beautiful SoCal Posts: 880	Thanks everyone........this was supposed to be lighthearted and I'm glad to see most of you kept it so. @ar81 -- good suggestion. Maybe other half? Spousal equivalent? I think S/O sounds really good......I'll probably go with that. __________________ Seize the moment!

10-25-2009, 09:26 AM	#20 (permalink)
spirit4711 Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: the Netherlands Posts: 2,244	How about: 'Oh, he's just a guy, I forgot his name.' __________________ 'Stay hungry, stay foolish' - Steve Jobs Want to improve your business results?

10-26-2009, 10:15 PM	#22 (permalink)
StarieEyed Senior Member Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 105	I just say "Hi this is Frank" and ppl get the idea. No need to explain!

11-03-2009, 09:45 PM	#23 (permalink)
Daffy Duck Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 2,246	I'm a little late on this, but I like to say, "This is [girlfriend's name], the woman who puts up with me on a daily basis." __________________ PHP Tutorials - easily learn programming in PHP. "Too blessed to be stressed!"

11-03-2009, 11:57 PM	#24 (permalink)
seeker5 Moderator Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 3,139	Sex-Toy One possible option if he doesn't like the term "boyfriend"

11-04-2009, 06:31 AM	#25 (permalink)
IFeelGood Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 213	Hi I'd like to introduce you to Caveman <insert name> or what Gene said... Love Slave <insert name>

11-04-2009, 08:43 AM	#26 (permalink)
brendannz Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,194	Your dawg Or initial-Dawg.. (I get called B-Dawg sometimes and find it a good name) __________________ "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler." - Henry David Thoreau

11-04-2009, 09:11 AM	#27 (permalink)
spirit4711 Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: the Netherlands Posts: 2,244	'He who cleans the dishes' 'Mr. Goodbar' 'This is Superman - incognito, of course.' 'My main source of frustration and joy' 'Another Martian' __________________ 'Stay hungry, stay foolish' - Steve Jobs Want to improve your business results?

11-04-2009, 04:38 PM	#28 (permalink)
Daffy Duck Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 2,246	I know what Spirit calls his man friend. "Hi, this is my better half; Daffy Duck." __________________ PHP Tutorials - easily learn programming in PHP. "Too blessed to be stressed!"

11-04-2009, 04:41 PM	#29 (permalink)
spirit4711 Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: the Netherlands Posts: 2,244	And Daffy introduces me as 'my spiritual half' __________________ 'Stay hungry, stay foolish' - Steve Jobs Want to improve your business results?

11-04-2009, 04:52 PM	#30 (permalink)
Daffy Duck Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 2,246	Sometimes, but I usually introduce you as the guy "I like to rub down with baby oil and spank." Hope you don't mind me saying that on here, babe. __________________ PHP Tutorials - easily learn programming in PHP. "Too blessed to be stressed!"

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