Making Peace

[seir]

A once-upon-a-time not too bad (read: rather close, but not intimate) friend of mine and I have been in a (now cold war like) fight for a long time. We haven't really been on great talking terms except for saying hello, either.

As far as I know (have been told, read etc.) he's been talking behind my back, calling me names and telling half-baked stories about me that seem to have turned quite a few people (in the hundreds) against me.

Now, even though it has been such a long time it seems we'll be involved in a working relationship again (as in: he's doing something similar that I do).

Unfortunately he's never been the guy to extend a hand towards anyone that didn't share his opinion rather closely. In fact, the farther you were from his opinion the close you were to being his enemy.

These things combined (our history, the fact that we'll have to get along in some way to work together and his unwillingness to try a fresh start of any kind) are my problem: What can I do to make things work?

Theoretically I could quit the position I'm supposed to start and avoid being in the same room with him that way (including having to work with him). I don't think that's the best solution. Unfortunately, I strongly (!) doubt that saying "hey, let's start over, I'm sorry and I hope you're sorry, too" (we both did some wrongs to each other) would work.

There's a twist to the situation: The guy and me are also in another organisation in which if he saw to it, he could escalate things enough to hurt me plenty (and I probably couldn't do much about it all). So, whatever I do, I'll have to do pretty carefully.

My dilemma's this: I want to work at both places (the one organisation and the new job). While it's relatively calm in the one organisation without starting out the new job, I think having to work closer with him might provoke his anger and actions against me (without me having anymore causal connection than actually getting the job). I've been thinking about this for a few weeks now .. and the best thing I've come up with is fear and stress. Any help, ideas, suggestions, recommendations heartily welcome.

P. S. I know it's just my viewpoint. I've however really tried to not exaggerate anything I've described, so please assume it to be true as it's written here.