Two guys, one girl, big mess.

[Dan.Linehan]

Originally Posted by {aspiring_to_clarity}

I know he's talked to other people and told them some not so savory details about me, whether they be truth or lies so I get that it hurts...it hurts me as well.

You asked for advice on an internet forum, so he spreads lies about you to friends to "show you how it feels." Classy.

What a loving relationship. Good luck with that.


PS. Leaving the forums is not what I had in mind when I told you to, "Do what you want to do and say what you want to say."

This isn't what you want and you know it.

[cylon]

Originally Posted by Dan.Linehan

You asked for advice on an internet forum, so he spreads lies about you to friends to "show you how it feels." Classy.

What a loving relationship. Good luck with that.


PS. Leaving the forums is not what I had in mind when I told you to, "Do what you want to do and say what you want to say."

Great now I can see him make her promise him to never ever talk about him online again which will make her more enmeshed.

[JSB]

I know we're only hearing things from her perspective, but the boyfriend sounds like poison.

[Honeywith4bees]

Originally Posted by JSB

I know we're only hearing things from her perspective, but the boyfriend sounds like poison.

In my opinion, the boyfriend is just an average guy, he's not intent on hurting her or being mean. But I think that between the two of them, their relationship is poison.

It's possible it could be saved, but not without a huge amount of growth and change, and it may not be worth it.

I know it's hard when you love someone to imagine a life with out them, but nine times out of ten, they look back and say Wow, why did we torture each other for so long??

[The Cloud]

Don't beat yourself up just because you think you're supposed to. There's no need for emotional self-mutilation, ever. Come back when you stop being afraid of what you think your friends and ex think about what you think. You are more important than the pain you feel; I hope you can understand that, for everyone's sake.

Oh, and hi Clarity's Ex . Don't be too hard on her, or yourself; it won't do you any good.

[seeker5]

Clarity,

Thank you for your message, and for coming back on here to let us know what was going on. I know we'll miss you a lot, and I know I'll miss you. I've really enjoyed having you around a good bit, and some of your posts are inspiring. Even this thread here has helped me clarify some issues I had and I mentioned that in another thread.

Having said that, I know you'll be back. Maybe not under the aspiring name, but maybe under another name. Maybe a lot of us will know about it, or maybe nobody will know. But I'm sure you'll be back.

You'll be back because you'll listen to that voice inside of you that tells you how important personal development is and how this forum is an important part of your own personal development. You'll listen to that voice that tells you that other people's feeling of betrayal and anger has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them in this situation. You'll listen to that voice of love, telling you to courageously go forth and be yourself, seek to be yourself and to seek greater understanding of what's going on. It's that voice of yours that will keep on nudging you over and over to continue to go for that life you seek, that life full of love, full of peace, full of respect, full of wonders knowing that the temporary cost of that life is the pain you will go through as you work through the issues of letting go of what other people around you think about you. It's that voice inside of you that will push you to let go and work through what's holding you back from fully and unconditionally loving yourself, knowing that once you do so, your situation will change dramatically. It's that voice of truth within yourself, that courageous voice. This voice inside of you that you will eventually decide to listen to and then you'll be back on this forum.

When you come back, we'll welcome you with warm open arms of love

Until then, I wish you a lot of love, and if there's anything I can do for you, whether that be just to listen or be a mirror, or anything else, feel free to pm or email me.

Love,

[Dan.Linehan]

Wow... you really haven't came back..

How sad.

[Corey]

This is why you DONT involve yourself with someone when you're with someone else.

[Angela]

Originally Posted by Corey

This is why you DONT involve yourself with someone when you're with someone else.

Corey, I think you are missing a LOT of information, in summing up what happened here this way.

It's like watching The Wizard of Oz, and saying, "Now, this is why you should NEVER leave Kansas."