How to approach this?

[badaim]

Hey guys,

I've been lurking a while here but finally registered! This site has a wealth of information and I have benefited quite a bit from it.

However, now I do come with an issue that I'm hoping you guys can help me with.

There's this girl in one of my classes at college that we met on the first day (introduced by a friend of mine) and us three agreed to help each other with homework.

Well, usually it's just the two of us (girl and I) for a good hour and a half working on homework until my buddy joins us after his class is out. Jane (lets call her that, shall we? ) and I would usually grab some food before we start our work and just talk. Even after we're done for the night, I would walk her back to her bus stop, hug, and part ways. Right outta the movies, right?

Anyways, all this started about five weeks back and I really did think that we could have *something* going (she did ask me for a fire department shirt as she thought those were "really cool"...).

So...last Thursday, I asked her (or texted for that matter) whether she wanted to grab some lunch. Bless her heart; no response. And she usually returns texts in seconds.

Next day, she texts me with a nice, long, lovely, message stating that she had to go to the doctor and wouldn't be in class. There was no reason for me to not believe her, as she was sick for the past few days. And isn't it a bit extreme to skip class to avoid a guy?

So yesterday, after walking her back, I asked her whether she wanted to grab some lunch today. A quite enthusiastic "Yeah!" was spewed and she told me to text her tomorrow and we'll figure out a time and place.

I cheerfully sent a text around noon-ish and since then, haven't gotten a reply...she's been quite active on Facebook, so I know that she isn't hospitalized or lying in a ditch somewhere or too busy to not text. At least give me something! Lie to me if you have to!

Thing is, I see her tomorrow...how should I approach this? I really don't want to make this awkward for the both of us (I'm sure she's feeling the same). She's a nice girl that I wouldn't want to lose as a friend even if things romantically may not work out.

Thanks for putting up with me,

-B

Oh, and forgot to add...I'm quite surprised to find myself posting this. Entering a burning structure; I won't bat an eyebrow. Venturing into relationships and all...oh boy. Interesting how life works, eh?

[Mr_A]

Stop with the texting

i can imagine the texts where questions about where and when, wanting her to decided. Again Stop the texting

You call her, OR you speak to her face to face and get her to agree and you set the time and the place there and then.

You have to sweep her off her feet, Woman love a man who knows what they want, and take charge to get it.

I won't get into the mechanics of why this is, but trust me when I say "TAKE CHARGE" and don't ask, if she doesn't want to she will say NO. Hold and direct yourself with a strength and she will melt. Remember you take charge, don't ask for her approval, she will tell you if she approves with her body language.

[badaim]

Read you loud and clear, Chief!

I tried to set up a time and place last night, but she had a test in the morning and classes in the afternoon and we were having problems figuring out a time . Then she just said "text me tomorrow and we'll figure something out." Hmm.

So I'll consider this a lesson learned.

Would you have any pointers how to approach this tomorrow when we meet? Just ignore it like nothing happened?

As for the "badaim" name...goes back to my days of PC gaming. Where I couldn't hit the broad side of a barn!

[Foggy]

Eh dude... it doesn't sound like there's much chemistry on her end. It also sounds like it's a situation that's about to become a classic case of "Ok I like her but she doesn't like me back." Furthermore I would say if she's blowing you off on this she's not very nice or high quality and I would be very hesitant to enter a relationship with anyone like that.

I guess my advice is to not let this issue drive you nuts. Don't hold onto the possibility that you can make her like you. Don't stalk her. If you feel that she wants space from you then give her space, if that's not what she wanted than she'll come to you. Otherwise why would you want to hang out with someone who doesn't really want to hang out with you.

[Mr_A]

I would not even mention it at all tomorrow. leave the close for the next encounter. Let her think she missed the opportunity.
Then you make the close, remember that you decide when and where. Don't Ask where? and when? Or ask if its OK, she basically wants to see how strong your navigation skills are because this ultimately determines how strong you are as a man.

A real man knows where he is in life, knows where wants to be, and knows how to get there.

This is how you should hold yourself:
Imagine you’re a superhero; and you walk up to her and say “I’m on a mission baby, with or without you”

She won't beable to resist