Problem with GF. Please HELP.

[Billiardsguy2006]

My gf of 4 months sends me a cell text message that she does not want to meet in the future? What should I do?
We met in October. Everything was going well. We saw each other practically every day. Until she sends me a text message on my cell this morning stating that she does not want me to come over today nor meet me in the future. WHAT IS THE OPTIMAL WAY TO RESPOND? I tried calling her two times but she did not answer. CAN ANYONE GIVE ME A PSCYHOLOGICAL EXPLAINATION OF WHAT HAPPENED? I am angry and upset. What is the best course of action. Mature answers only please.

[ns123]

Your girlfriend just told you in the most selfish & cowardly way possible that she broke up with you.

I am so sorry this happened to you. She obviously doesn't want to explain anything to you nor end the relationship in a way that you will have closure. That said, there is no way you can make her.

I suggest you text her back with, "let's talk about this, what do you think?" If you receive no reply, you will have your answer. Good riddance to her.

Work on getting over her and the hurt that you feel. You don't want to be with someone so callous with such a disregard for other people's feelings.

Much love to you.

Update: There is also a possibility that there is something going on where she has to end the relationship immediately, but cannot tell you why. Until she decides to tell you, you will never know.

[aelle]

Without further information about you and your situation, it's really hard to tell you anything else than that she is the only one who could provide explanations for her decision, if she wanted to.

A few scenarios come to mind, though.
As ns123 added, and especially if you are both very young, she may not be the one responsible for this decision - I'm thinking of an overprotective father who would have recently discovered the relationship and forbid it.

Also, she could have considered your whole involvment to be casual, and not an actual relationship. When she found she wasn't having fun anymore, she called it off. There are nicer ways of doing that, but this is the easiest and, well, most widespread.

And to be honest, her message ("get out of my life") and refusal to answer her phone makes me think of a stalker situation - you can't get rid of insisting unwanted attention by talking it over, you can only try to cut it out of your life. Is it possible that the 2 of you had a very different idea of what happened during those last 4 months? Again, without further information we can only speculate.

[RT Wolf]

Wow, this illustrates perfectly how people hate not having answers.

Deal with your anger, feelings of hurt and betrayal. Yea, you got side-swiped and weren't expecting it. Like ns123 said, text her once and maybe email her once and then if she doesn't respond, let her go. Just give up your resentment and anger and move on.

It probably didn't have anything to do with you anyway.

[LordSappington]

One of my good friends had his wife leave him a few years ago. She seemed to be all happy in the relationship. He was certainly happy. One weekend, he went out of town for business. When he came back, all of her stuff was moved out of the house and there was a note, "I want a divorce." She was secretly unhappy and thought he would change into someone else after marriage. She was also cheating on him. Was there something my friend could've done to fix the problem? Maybe. But it wasn't likely when she didn't keep the lines of communication open throughout all of her trouble. Some people just aren't ready for that kind of relationship. Next time, try your best to be open with the girl and tell her you want her to be open with you. Yeah, there's a chance she may promise to and never do it, but that's love for you.

[chrisentheo]

Shes not worth it then. Best to accept its happened. Get over it and move on with your life. She obviously didnt want to be a part of it. Let her be. Worst thing you can do kinda suck up to her by asking her why and what her reasons are. Yes, you may deserve answers, but would you really want to be with a cowardly girl? Only schoolgirls do such things and you shouldnt accept 2nd class behaviour like that.

[edith]

Sweet Billiards Guy....

She didn't handle it very well. That's for certain. Do you want to be with someone who handles Really Important Stuff like that??

But something to consider when you've reached an equilibrium. Can you guess at any way you were in the relationship that would make her break up with you that way?

I've found it really hard when I tried to share the important stuff but the other person just would not listen; in fact, they would actively squash any kind of conversation about it. It made me not want to try anymore because I'd been rebuffed so many times. It hurt. In the end, I ended it abruptly, probably unkindly, but I felt like it was the only avenue I had left.

Just something to consider - why she didn't do it more kindly. We all do things that prompt a certain response from other people. Something to think about as you move into other relationships. Dangitall - it's never black or white.

[WRX AJT]

When my ex-girlfriend broke up with me, I just sent her a txt saying "Have fun tonite..." and after I sent it, I didn't call / txt / Myspace / AIM / etc. After a week, she called me wondering why I haven't talked to her at all. I suppose it was my way of saying, you had me and now you don't... it's your loss cause I'm already over it and moving on.

If there is one thing I've learned out of that experience is not to sweat the small things. There are PLENTY of other women in the world. Perhaps women that are even more amazing then your ex. Just remember to look at this situation in a positive light and continue on from there.

Best wishes...