Issue - Stereotyping women

[andy999]

Hi, is everyone OK?? This isnt the most formmated post, im just writing my thoughts as I go...


In a nutshell, I have a bit of an issue when it comes to women. Now, before i continue, I have to say that I genuinely love women. However, I cant help but have a negative attitude towards them. I know that sounds a bit counter intuitive to my former statement, but let me explain.

Basically, I was never the most popular kid in high school. I wouldnt go as far as to say that I was bullied, but girls were never my bright point at school. I had a couple of crushes which ended terrible. I look back on those dark days and laugh at how stupid I was. After that, I went to a different college. Made a lot of friends there and got myself a girlfriend. However, I used to smoke weed whilst at college and I must have looked like a right fool. I cringe when i think about that, because I had a number of girls who were interested in me, and through my stoned appearance drove them away!

So, fast forward 3 years. Im now 20, had a couple of girlfriends and around half a dozen NSA One nighters. However, I still have this issue with respect to women. As I never had any girls interested in me at high school, I developed this phobia. As the years have gone by, ive done some research and worked at this area in my life.

But, I still cant help but feel that women are generally bitchy towards me. Its almost as if 'guilty until proven innocent,' ie, they are bitchy until I get to know them and find that their not. What im trying to say is, growing up girls were bitchy with me, and so now my mind stereotypes girls, labelling them until I get to know them. Now I know this isnt a good thing, so im asking for some feedback. As i said earlier, I do like women. I want to meet some cool girls and get a proper relationship, but whenever I think about opening a girl, my mind tells me that their bitchy and I shouldnt seize the opportunity. The thing is, I know girls arent like this, its just my mind has been propgrammed to think like this, which in turn affects my motivation to go out and meet women. It makes me want to forget seeking a relationship and just have one night stands. Having sex with girls knowing im never going to see them again, that i couldnt give a damn how they felt etc. Almost like im getting 'payback' for the times when i was made to feel sh*tty by girls.

Any ideas on this??? My mind is in overdrive when I get deep into thought on this....

Regards,

Andy

[Xanafax]

First of all. You shouldn't just hand out respect for people. Make them earn it. Second, not all girls are nice anyway, some will be mega-bitches with their bleach-blonde head shoved up their well-used you-know-what.

Now don't become a misogynist. Instead retain a healthy neutrality. Don't think good or bad thoughts until you know them well enough to make the judgement.

Second, there is nothing wrong with wanting to have one night stands. I know I do. If that's all you want, do it, get it out of your system. If you still want to do it after a while, then you know that's what you want to do, don't force yourself to be Mr. Nice guy with the sexually repressed wife, picket fenced house and a wardrobe full of Polo-shirts.

[Holistic Star]

Do you have any female friends? Do you hang out with any women that are dating your male friends so you can get to know them in a non-sexual way?

Is this a problem with all women, or just women you are interested in?