What should I do about this gift?
My mother bought me a jewelry box this year. I don't know why she picked a jewelry box, but she did. The problem is... I really don't like it. I mean not just a casual "oh I probably would not have bought it" but a really intense dislike for it (I would never have bought this for myself...ever). I have never shown an interest in jewelry boxes (she bought me another one previously, which was also quite large, and I still have it buried in my closet) and especially not of this size! I feel really guilty because I would very much like to return it, but I don't want to hurt her feelings because she paid so much for it. I am still living in my parent's home and I know she will notice if I am not using it. What should I do?
Your mother wants to give you a gift that has meaning and connection with her....
My advice ask her to go with you to return it and find a gift that fits that bill
Plus spend a day out shopping with her.... eat lunch/ talk about yourself so she knows more about you and your likes.... That will be the best gift for both of you
Do what I do and tell my mum not to buy my presents as she always gets it wrong and I either throw the presents away or tell her to give it to someone else.
She's learnt and no longer buys me presents :)
I can be honest with my mum though, she doesn't mind.
Be politely honest with your mother. Tell her you really appreciate the thought and effort she put forth in buying the gift for you. Then remind her you received a jewelry box from her previously and you don't use it. Ask her to go shopping with you to return the gift and pick out something new that you will truly enjoy. This will help open up communication lines between the two of you. Enjoy your day together.
Agree. Be honest with her, or for your birthday you'll get an even bigger jewelry box and the problem will keep getting bigger.
Any reasonable person would appreciate the honesty, and even though parents are not always reasonable, it's still worth a shot.
Smile, say thanks, and put it at the back of your closet again.
If she asks you why you are not using it, tell her you love her, appreciate her thinking of you, and change the subject. If she presses, tell her you are just not using it right now.
No matter how crappy a gift I'm given, I always smile, thank the person for thinking of me, feel incredibly grateful, and then stuff it at the back of my closet or return it. If I don't know where they got it, I would casually ask, thanks for thinking of me! Wherever did you get this?
Sometimes, I don't think honesty is the best policy in this case.
Hope that helps.
Oh dear I'm not that sweet to my mum :)
I just joke with her, about it.
Be honest and upfront about it. Odds are great that she bought what SHE would like for herself and not you. I don't take it personally when someone doesn't like what I buy them and neither should your mother. If she does take it personally then it's a personal choice she has made to do so.
Honesty is much better than not hurting other people's feelings :p
Whatever happened to "It's the thought that counts"? Appreciate the kind intentions behind the gift, say thank you, and use it or don't as you wish. "Trading up" seems a little crass to me.
I agree with legend. you should get your mom to go with you so you can pick something out together so your mother feels like she is a part of the entire process.
Have you heard of the stereotype of getting a festive christmas sweater from you grandma that is itchy and ugly?
Maybe you could take this as a sign that your not being honest to yourself with the energy you show to her?
Just a suggestion.
But as long as you lern something from this experience and do something different in the future... then it is a good gift really? isnt it :)
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