what do men find really UNATTRACTIVE in women?

[ZephyrusX]

If we are talking within the context of romantic relationships, why wouldn't a woman want to be attracted to her partner physically, emotionally and spiritually? If she is not attracted to you physically, I see no problem with her finding someone else, but then, I also reject the notion that there is this 'hierarchy' of attractive guys out there. You don't need to look like a superstar in order for a woman to be physically attracted to you.

Originally Posted by christianyethboth

What I also find unattractive in women are those who only go for 'physically attractive looking guys' and deliberately ignore the less 'physically attractive looking guys' even though they may have better personalities than the 'physically attractive looking guys'.

[Gugol]

Men are attracted to the physical, women are attracted to how a man makes them feel. Personally, I like women who are decisive, true to themselves, somewhat independent, who can function by themselves in an inter-dependent relationship as opposed to a co-dependent one.
Women who expect "things" instead of being grateful for what they receive, co-dependency, demanding, drugs, alcohol, etc, are major turnoffs for me. BTW, did I mention that they have to be "good looking" LOL

[scotthegeek]

anger flaking and nagging

[supertom]

I can understand this thread under "venting" but other than that it doesn't seem valuable. All it is going to accomplish is making someone insecure and feel bad about themselves.

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by ZephyrusX

If we are talking within the context of romantic relationships, why wouldn't a woman want to be attracted to her partner physically, emotionally and spiritually? If she is not attracted to you physically, I see no problem with her finding someone else, but then, I also reject the notion that there is this 'hierarchy' of attractive guys out there. You don't need to look like a superstar in order for a woman to be physically attracted to you.

Because when you love someone you see them through different eyes than you saw them the first time you saw him. If you give a less-attractive guy a chance and come to love him, he becomes attractive to you.

That is love. That is why there is the saying "S/he has a face only a mother could love" and "love is blind." Love does not see the difference between a pretty boy and an average-looking guy.

Whether you are a woman loving a man or a man loving a woman, that is a trait of love.

[votoshka]

Originally Posted by Gugol

Men are attracted to the physical, women are attracted to how a man makes them feel. Personally, I like women who are decisive, true to themselves, somewhat independent, who can function by themselves in an inter-dependent relationship as opposed to a co-dependent one.
Women who expect "things" instead of being grateful for what they receive, co-dependency, demanding, drugs, alcohol, etc, are major turnoffs for me. BTW, did I mention that they have to be "good looking" LOL

This is a bit of a generalisation. In general, I am attracted to men who I am physically attracted to. Yes, he has to have a good personality (and be a decent person), but a great guy with a nice personality isn't going to do it for me unless I find him physically attractive as well. He might make a good friend, but not a great romantic partner! Does this make me shallow? Errm... probably no more shallow than all the guys who say they need a girl with a pretty face .

[ZephyrusX]

Do you mean that one could develop physical attraction? May be. All I know is that I can develop emotional and spiritual attraction for other women. I may even love them on that basis, but I may not feel physically attracted to them, and on that basis, I wouldn't want to get into a romantic relationship with them or love them romantically. Doing otherwise would be rather odd.
Of course, the reverse is true as well. My only real point is that physical attraction is important, and all other things being equal, of course a woman is going to go out with the partner that she is more physically attracted to.

Originally Posted by Bliss Sage

Because when you love someone you see them through different eyes than you saw them the first time you saw him. If you give a less-attractive guy a chance and come to love him, he becomes attractive to you.

That is love. That is why there is the saying "S/he has a face only a mother could love" and "love is blind." Love does not see the difference between a pretty boy and an average-looking guy.

Whether you are a woman loving a man or a man loving a woman, that is a trait of love.

[Kaie]

Originally Posted by supertom

I can understand this thread under "venting" but other than that it doesn't seem valuable. All it is going to accomplish is making someone insecure and feel bad about themselves.

I agree. I will spin it around and say that confidence and being comfortable in her own skin is what makes a woman attractive. Men have different tastes, as do women.

[Solipsist]

Originally Posted by dice

I understand that stuff like facial hair and body odours, generally unhealthy people would be unattractive, but GENDER SPECIFIC: what's not cool?

I think it'd be really helpful if you could just describe someone you know personally who is really unattractive.

On that note: What do you dudes think of keira knightley's body? I'm very curious. (Personally I think shes a little sinewy)

I'm more likely to respond to the thread title, than to the OP.

That said, I'll echo, somewhat, what lifey notes--

Originally Posted by lifetimelearner

[...]to me a woman is 'ugly' when she is displaying cruel or egostistical behavior

Call me what you will, but I really don't care if a woman has the looks of a goddess; if she displays tendencies of being b*tchy, she's unattractive to me.

On the physical side, the only thing that I have issues with is a big butt. But, it's my issue, not hers, and I don't judge a woman any less for having a big butt.

Regarding Kiera Knightley, I find "sinewy" an interesting descriptive. Indeed, she's very thin, but, again, unless she's b*tchy, which I have yet to notice in her (or, at least in her acting roles), I won't hold her thinness against her. Many people struggle with weight issues, whether it's losing it or gaining it, and apparently she is no different. It only makes her human. Otherwise, I think she's quite attractive.

[srikant]

Statements like

"So i can always talk to you when i am down right?" - Really you want to bore me when u are down. Go take pills.

"You dont have time nowadays" - Maybe i shud give u a log of my activities so u can track when i am free and call me up.

"I am so down in the dumps. I Dont know what to do anymore" - I know u are expecting sympathetic reaction, but i dont care

lol

[Fred Tracy]

First, about keira knighley.. Not even remotely. Way too skinny. But my tastes do tend to be rather… Different.

as far as what I find unattractive in women, here's a short list in no particular order:

1. Short hair
2. Bitchy or negative attitude
3. Overly confident or assertive
4. Facial hair
5. Too loud
6. Unattractive physically (obviously)
7. Smoking

I tend to like girls who are feminine and curvaceous. I don't usually like girls with masculine traits (high assertiveness, combativeness, etc.) unless it's just for sex. Then it's on like donkey Kong… hahaha.

Originally Posted by srikant

Statements like

"So i can always talk to you when i am down right?" - Really you want to bore me when u are down. Go take pills.

"You dont have time nowadays" - Maybe i shud give u a log of my activities so u can track when i am free and call me up.

"I am so down in the dumps. I Dont know what to do anymore" - I know u are expecting sympathetic reaction, but i dont care

lol

Lol, I know you may be kidding, but my reactions tend to skew towards what you are saying. That naturally always kind of been a jerk (though nonabusive), and women – for whatever reason – find that attractive.

[elucidate]

By assertiveness, do you mean you don't like women who ask for what they want or make their needs known to you, or stand up for themselves?

Originally Posted by Fred Tracy

First, about keira knighley.. Not even remotely. Way too skinny. But my tastes do tend to be rather… Different.

as far as what I find unattractive in women, here's a short list in no particular order:

1. Short hair
2. Bitchy or negative attitude
3. Overly confident or assertive
4. Facial hair
5. Too loud
6. Unattractive physically (obviously)
7. Smoking

I tend to like girls who are feminine and curvaceous. I don't usually like girls with masculine traits (high assertiveness, combativeness, etc.) unless it's just for sex. Then it's on like donkey Kong… hahaha.



Lol, I know you may be kidding, but my reactions tend to skew towards what you are saying. That naturally always kind of been a jerk (though nonabusive), and women – for whatever reason – find that attractive.

[laughingmatter]

Aside from the obvious physical stuff, that other guys have mentioned...

- Emotionally guarded or stoic in personal matters.

This is difficult to explain but generally tends to be more of an issue with older women and women who have built successful careers (where emotional control is a positive trait to have).

Of course its good to have a level of emotional control to further career, or get stuff done.

But it is unattractive when she can't let loose on a date or in a relationship, something about this just kills a kind of emotional intimacy that I enjoy.

Some girls take this too far and become needy / obsessive, which can become mildly annoying. But if I am attracted to her, and she can deal with the fact that her neediness isn't going to change my behavior in any significant manner, then it isn't a deal breaker for me.

It is a bit ironic, but I tend to be emotionally calm and unaffected by the ebb and flow of life so maybe I just have better chemistry with the opposite personality type.

[MoonUnit]

In no particular order

- Hairy - moustache / dark arm hair / leg hair

- Smelly

- Grossly fat

- Bad teeth

- Smokes

- Talk fast with annoying voice

- Say "Oh my god" 3 times a sentence

- Low self-esteem

- Lazy

- Alcoholic

- Stupidity

- Has a loser boyfriend

- Cruelness

- Thinking she's the most awesome thing ever

- Believes in fairies

[Cornelius Spiyder]

Originally Posted by RRR

I think its hard for humans in this century. We are no longer a natural species and we have so many confusing directions from these titans of deception, culture, religion, family, all the mythologies that don't speak the truth about life.



I've read about a study where a large percentage of women have fantasies of being raped. I believe done in the 40s or 50s by Kinsey. (here is a quick google search result) Table 1 indicates that estimates of how many women have had rape fantasies are comparable for the community and student samples. Community estimates ranged from 31% to 49%, while student samples ranged from 31% to 57%.

I think a lot of what life lacks is what we had before civilization. We are seeking adventure, passion, purpose, motivation, all these things have been stripped away from us by being born into this century. The life I feel is being prescribed to me by the demigods of our time, my family, my culture, the consensus religion, the status quo, makes life sooooo boring (speaking from a suburban Ohioan perspective), it makes me want to throw a sharp stick at something and bring it back to the women I love for a celebratory orgy. It seems the more I go against the status quo, the more I go against cultural norms, the more I go against religion, the more I go with what is in my gut, the happier I become. It is only when I act on instinct that I truly feel human.

After reading this post i wanted to shake your hand.

I agree 100 percent.

i have nothing else to say, you hit the nail on the head

[Criseyde]

Originally Posted by MoonUnit

In no particular order

- Hairy - moustache / dark arm hair / leg hair

- Talk fast with annoying voice

- Say "Oh my god" 3 times a sentence

- Believes in fairies

You would hate me. Sometimes I say "oh my God" three times in a ROW. Run away, boys!

[Brutha]

Sometimes I say "oh my God" three times in a ROW. Run away, boys!

I think it's cute

[Criseyde]

Originally Posted by Brutha

I think it's cute

Aw... thank you!

[Kronique]

this thread blows =/

i could care less if men think im too tomboyish

guys like that are really unattractive to me anyways

not going to sell myself out. If you cant respect that choice in a person (to not be sincere) well that speaks for itself. You want to manipulate people.

girls have a lot of potential to FIX the world; actually so do men if they'd start taking on some great qualities women have and vice versa. (Empathy: it wont make your balls fall off ;D)

The day humans stopped selling themselves out to their crappy gender stereotypes is the day the world becomes a flipping theme park.

[Kronique]

Originally Posted by Cornelius Spiyder

After reading this post i wanted to shake your hand.

I agree 100 percent.

i have nothing else to say, you hit the nail on the head

We cant go back to being cavemen though, we have to bring back some old bits of gold and STREAMLINE the rest (aka give women their loving self-esteem, they damn well deserve not to be brainwashed and their full potential needs to be met )

we can never know the powers women have until we prop them up. women are making great strides in society which is great, but they're jeered at for being too "nurturing and soft". that has to change they have to be nurturing and hard

every society and country where the women make great strides and social improvements becomes stronger and has a higher standard of living. im just saying give nurturing a chance.

the only reason evil men run countries into the ground is because they're too closed off to their good FEMININE side.

[Pokerface]

body hair that has not been dealt with, an untidy house, these speak of bad hygeine which could mean personal self worth issues and depression. but that of course my personal view and taste, you may not agree, and that is of course ok.

Not being able to speak well, for example, saying, 'free' when they mean 'three' that sort of thing, this speaks of laziness and unintelligence, unintelligent people are angry people in my experience, again you may not agree, that is ok, this is after all my experience and preference.