Approaching Women/Fear of Rejection (Questions for Men & Women)

[bd90]

I've been working on approaching women. One assignment I tried was to say hi to 200 women. So I went to a mall and did that. The interactions were interesting. Some women were shocked, some ignored me, some said hi back and seemed pleasantly surprised by it. Only a small few seemed to be annoyed by it. The point was to realize that women are friendly and there's nothing wrong with approaching random strangers. I did feel uncomfortable at first, but it got better throughout the day.

Questions for the men:

Do you have a fear of approaching women? And how do you overcome it? Have you had any positive experiences?

Being a man is tough because we face the fear of rejection when asking a girl out. That's why we get so nervous. My next assignment is to get rejected by 101 women so that I can get used to rejection. I plan to ask random women to go out for a cup of coffee.

Questions for the women:

When I guy approaches you for whatever reason, do you automatically think he is hitting on you?

Would you be offended if a guy came up to you and said "hey, I find you attractive and would like to go out with you for a cup of coffee to get to know you better?" If not, what would be a better way for a man to approach you.

[The NorthStar of Hope]

Originally Posted by bd90

My next assignment is to get rejected by 101 women so that I can get used to rejection. I plan to ask random women to go out for a cup of coffee.

LOL, truly loved the theory, in other word overcoming your fear of rejection..
However, since I'm a Muslim. I've never actually asked a woman out, but, I "guess" I won't be easily rejected ...

[kpreston]

One assignment I tried was to say hi to 200 women. So I went to a mall and did that. The interactions were interesting. Some women were shocked, some ignored me, some said hi back and seemed pleasantly surprised by it. Only a small few seemed to be annoyed by it.

First off, congratulations. You accomplished more at that mall than I've done in my life. I'd really like to hear more about this, if you could elaborate on it some.

[Holistic Star]

If I saw a guy ask for other women first to go for coffee before finally asking me yes I would be offended! In fact a few months ago at a nightclub a guy hit on my three friends in turn before trying it on with me. To say he got short shrift is an understatment!

However, I do remember many years ago being in a pub with a female friend for a drink and as we left a guy chased me out the pub and said something like 'I just have to have your phone number!' I said no, because I already had a boyfriend, but wow was I flattered. I mean that was about 18 years ago and I still remember it!

I think the trick is to make the women you are asking feel special and not that you are making up the numbers!

[handle]

I would have to agree with Holistic Star...

A woman wants to feel special, not second or worse best. It's not just men who have a fear of rejection, women have the same fear. It all depends on who has the guts to make the first move. Attraction plays a role in it too. As well as how you approach the person, has a part to play in determining the reaction you get.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by bd90

Questions for the women:

When I guy approaches you for whatever reason, do you automatically think he is hitting on you?

Yes,because the entire reason that you talk to someone in the first place is because something about them attracted you to them. Otherwise everybody would be walking up to everyone and asking them out! But if a guy were to single ME out and come up to me,yes i would have no other reason than to assume he is attracted to me and therefore wants to get to know me. I've never had a guy come up to me and just want to be friends *insane laughter*

Would you be offended if a guy came up to you and said "hey, I find you attractive and would like to go out with you for a cup of coffee to get to know you better?" If not, what would be a better way for a man to approach you.

I would not be offended,no...i would either say yes or no depending on how much i wanted to date him. Which can only be based on looks at that point,so i would probably say no. Unless he was good looking to the point where i knew there was already something going for him. I don't like to date guys who arent attractive to me because i'm probably only going to like him as a friend then,and i would feel bad leading him on by dating him.

[Nasir]

Originally Posted by bd90

I've been working on approaching women. One assignment I tried was to say hi to 200 women. So I went to a mall and did that. The interactions were interesting. Some women were shocked, some ignored me, some said hi back and seemed pleasantly surprised by it. Only a small few seemed to be annoyed by it. The point was to realize that women are friendly and there's nothing wrong with approaching random strangers. I did feel uncomfortable at first, but it got better throughout the day.

Questions for the men:

Do you have a fear of approaching women? And how do you overcome it? Have you had any positive experiences?

Being a man is tough because we face the fear of rejection when asking a girl out. That's why we get so nervous. My next assignment is to get rejected by 101 women so that I can get used to rejection. I plan to ask random women to go out for a cup of coffee.

Questions for the women:

When I guy approaches you for whatever reason, do you automatically think he is hitting on you?

Would you be offended if a guy came up to you and said "hey, I find you attractive and would like to go out with you for a cup of coffee to get to know you better?" If not, what would be a better way for a man to approach you.

Are you working concepts from the "pick-up community?"

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by Holistic Star

If I saw a guy ask for other women first to go for coffee before finally asking me yes I would be offended! In fact a few months ago at a nightclub a guy hit on my three friends in turn before trying it on with me. To say he got short shrift is an understatment!

And this is how most guys in nightclubs and bars are,at least in my experience,and i've been going to them at least once a month for the last 15 years.

However, I do remember many years ago being in a pub with a female friend for a drink and as we left a guy chased me out the pub and said something like 'I just have to have your phone number!' I said no, because I already had a boyfriend, but wow was I flattered. I mean that was about 18 years ago and I still remember it!

Well you didnt know how many other girls he asked before he asked you. But if you were the only one,yeah that would be cool! *tries to imagine what that would be like* sigh

I think the trick is to make the women you are asking feel special and not that you are making up the numbers!

Well i certainly hope guys are not tricking us into thinking we are the only one they're after! Although i am not an idiot and i know we aren't. Nobody ever only likes one person.

[mrsmith]

Originally Posted by bd90

I've been working on approaching women. One assignment I tried was to say hi to 200 women. So I went to a mall and did that. The interactions were interesting. Some women were shocked, some ignored me, some said hi back and seemed pleasantly surprised by it. Only a small few seemed to be annoyed by it. The point was to realize that women are friendly and there's nothing wrong with approaching random strangers. I did feel uncomfortable at first, but it got better throughout the day.

Questions for the men:

Do you have a fear of approaching women? And how do you overcome it? Have you had any positive experiences?

Being a man is tough because we face the fear of rejection when asking a girl out. That's why we get so nervous. My next assignment is to get rejected by 101 women so that I can get used to rejection. I plan to ask random women to go out for a cup of coffee.

Questions for the women:

When I guy approaches you for whatever reason, do you automatically think he is hitting on you?

Would you be offended if a guy came up to you and said "hey, I find you attractive and would like to go out with you for a cup of coffee to get to know you better?" If not, what would be a better way for a man to approach you.

A few years ago I was afraid to approach women. I was caught up with the fear of rejection.

A year or so of pillow hugging changed that for me. Once I realized that I had something to offer (looks, charm, jokes, creativity, brains, etc) it became a lot easier to approach women and get dates.

When I defeated my fear all of my experiences were positive. I started leaning on my ability to find humor in most situations. Whenever I saw a female that I wanted to approach I would think of something funny to say and use that as a springboard. So far I'm 100%.

Here's a tip: If you're approaching a woman don't go on and on about how beautiful she is. She already knows, do something different and memorable.

[bd90]

Hey Kpreston, here's my journal on the mall experience.

Today I decided to go to the mall and say "hi" to 200 women. The exercise I thought at first would be hard but I decided that this is what I need to do to get through my insecurities. I am proud of myself for tackling through the uneasiness it felt at first. Although it did help that I consider myself to be a social person in general.

What did I notice? Inside, I was a little nervous at first. But I noticed that once I started and got a couple “hi’s” under my belt I felt better. I tried to push myself a little bit by saying hi to women I found attractive rather than just say hi to the older women, which was much easier. I think part of my anxiety is that I assume that younger, beautiful women assume that I am just trying to pick them up.

What I observed was that the majority of the interactions were either neutral or positive. Some were surprised and taken aback for a moment. Some of them thought I worked at the store. Some seemed generally surprised in a good way. There were a few women who either ignored me or seemed annoyed by my approach. I figure that these women either had something else more important on their mind, they were having a bad day, or they were just terminally unhappy people.

When I did get a bad reaction, I noticed that it made me feel down a little and played into my next interaction. And rather than just go up to anyone, I would play it safe and say hi to people I thought would be more open to a hi. Although I didn’t do this all the time and would just say hi to anyone.

So as I got more comfortable I started to just walk into stores (even women stores) and said hi to the sales clerk and wished them a happy holiday. One women was shocked and thanked me for doing so. Another women mentioned how nice that was for me to say.

Overall the interactions were either good or neutral with a few bad seeds. What I did realize was that it wasn’t a life or death situation. I wasn’t going to die. And I actually found the activity sort of fun. I felt good that I actually did something that I thought would be much harder. It feels good to be alive!

[bd90]

Wow, this really is a Smart People's forum. Thanks for all the great responses.

Nasir...Yes, I am familiar with the pickup community. I've read DYD, The Game, Juggler, etc. Some of it is useful, although I didn't get the idea from them. I actually got the idea from a book about overcoming fear. I forget which one.

LOL, truly loved the theory, in other word overcoming your fear of rejection..
However, since I'm a Muslim. I've never actually asked a woman out, but, I "guess" I won't be easily rejected ...

Northstar...because your Muslim, you cannot be rejected. Can you elaborate? Just curious and I don't mean anything bad by this.

Rockchick26 and Holistic Star...great advice. Making women feel special. I can do that.

Once I realized that I had something to offer (looks, charm, jokes, creativity, brains, etc) it became a lot easier to approach women and get dates.

MrSmith...how did you come to this realization? Affirmations? I actually do feel that I have an attractive personality and I have a lot to offer.

As for the rejection assignment, I think it's more about dealing with my insecurities and trying to protect my ego. As well, just to get used to the fact that I am not in control of the outcome, so why worry? I really am trying not to be outcome dependent. If it's no great, a yes, even better. Either way, I win and build confidence in myself.

I can say that this one is more difficult than just saying hi. It requires much more commitment. I started out slowly, asking women at my work. Most of them were married women. Some were older than me and they didn't take me seriously. Some of them said yes because they thought I was kidding. Some of them just had a hard time saying no. I am kind of a fun loving type of guy. Even though I was trying to be serious.

What I realized was that even if I was joking, the mere act of asking a women out felt uncomfortable to me. But just like the mall experience, once I got a few under my belt, I felt more confident. Yet, sometimes I regress back to my comfort zone. But hey, I'm not perfect. I'm going to keep asking women just to get comfortable actually saying those words.

I did ask one girl out that I just met through a friend one night. I just threw it out there and she told me she was married. She was actually flattered that I asked her. I am slowly beginning to realize that asking women out is just the normal process of courtship and that most interactions will be either positive or neutral. If they are bad, who cares. It doesn't have anything to do with me. [/QUOTE]

[TonyToneTone]

Originally Posted by bd90

Questions for the men:

Do you have a fear of approaching women? And how do you overcome it? Have you had any positive experiences?

I got 7 numbers walking down Hollywood Blvd on Sunday and 1 more from a GORGEOUS woman at a coffee shop afterwards. My friends and I were just walking up to any good looking girls walking by and talking to them.

Was I nervous at first? Maybe slightly. After the 1st or 2nd girl I was no longer nervous at all. In fact I was now excited to do it. I was having fun with it and we were doing the most OUTLANDISH stuff. Quite a few of the women were open to coming back to our hotel room that night as it was right on the street.

All you do is this; relax and practice. Have fun with it. It's for your good. I love women and talking to them is a fun enjoyable experience. Just be yourself. That's the best "game" you can do. Develop a style that works for you. Have fun with it. Don't take it so seriously if one says no. There are a million different reasons she could have said no; in a hurry, friends are with so she doesn't want to appear slutty, in a relationship, parents are with her, etc.... If she says no, so what? You didn't lose anything as you didn't have her to begin with. Just move on to the next. Eventually if not immediately you will find one that will say yes.

One girl I spoke to was quite rude. I saw her a bit later and went up to her again, this time she was COMPLETELY friendly. She just misinterpreted what I had said to the first time. So keep trying. It's fun.

Once I realized that I had something to offer (looks, charm, jokes, creativity, brains, etc) it became a lot easier to approach women and get dates.

Same with me. Once I realized I had SO much going for me it has become a piece of cake. In fact I usually get picked up by women. Every day I am learning more and more about just how much I have to offer.

[The NorthStar of Hope]

However, I do remember many years ago being in a pub with a female friend for a drink and as we left a guy chased me out the pub and said something like 'I just have to have your phone number!' I said no, because I already had a boyfriend, but wow was I flattered. I mean that was about 18 years ago and I still remember it!

I think the trick is to make the women you are asking feel special and not that you are making up the numbers![/QUOTE]

Quite the interesting theory ...

[spookie149]

bd90- It's true about making the girl feel special. However, be careful not to pull out the cliches. Some girls are romantic and love that stuff. But there are others who are turned off by it. Which kind of woman are you attracted to? A dreamer?

Another thing about the women who didn't smile back. Did you notice if they were sometimes the more attractive ones? Generally speaking I am flattered if a guy calls me beautiful. However, if it's done wrong I would get turned off. I know when I doll myself up I can be a head turner. If that's what I'm going for then a comment like you're beautiful is fine. But I place more value on who I am as a person. ie. my sense of humour, my compassion, wit, etc. If someone asks me out based on just what they see on the outside they don't really know me. .

[Louise1987]

I have a guy friend who was asking me why it was that my ex-boyfriend had managed to date three attractive girls when the ex was nothing special and a bit immature and yet he (my friend) had trouble dating anyone. He felt it had a lot to do with looks. Whilst looks play a small part I was trying to explain that it was the way my ex-boyfriend introduced himself that caught my attention.

I was at a bar. He came next to me, turned, smiled and said 'hi, can I buy you a drink?'. He seemed confident but not arrogant. Much later on in the conversation he admitted that he was scared stiff asking if he could buy me a drink, but he didn't want to appear desperate. Again, a touch of humour, something to make him human.

I understand it is really difficult for guys (more so than girls because of the social pressure) so I gave some tips to my guy friend:

1) Smile and look the person in the eye
2) Appear confident - it is off putting if someone is so obviously very very nervous because that makes someone laugh nervously, or talk too much or too little. Then I end up feeling sorry for them rather than attracted to them. I understand this is quite difficult but with practice you can get better .......bd90 it seems as if you are completely doing the right thing!

That's it. That is how my average immature ex-boyfriend managed to date three lovely ladies (.....keeping them on another hand was another matter.....)

[The NorthStar of Hope]

But Louise, seriously, how to distinguish between confidence and arrogance. I mean, I know I'm confident, but sometimes I fear to be misunderstood as "so full of himself" ...

[funchy]

I like your experiment. I think more people should try this. Talking to strangers really isn't so hard.

Here's a follow-up experiment. Make a goal to talk to X number of people. Say "hi" AND follow up with a sincere-sounding compliment. Bonus points each time you can get the other person to smile.

Originally Posted by bd90

Questions for the women:

When I guy approaches you for whatever reason, do you automatically think he is hitting on you?

No, why would I? Context, body language, and conversation would tell me if he was thinking those thoughts.

Would you be offended if a guy came up to you and said "hey, I find you attractive and would like to go out with you for a cup of coffee to get to know you better?" If not, what would be a better way for a man to approach you.

Sounds good to me. I might be more inclined to say no until I talked to the guy a moment first. I'd hate to agree to meet him just to find out he's an arrogant SOB who just wants to talk about how beautiful he thinks he is.

Why not break the ice with a conversation starter. Then after a minute or dialogue say "hey, do you want to go grab some coffee and chat some more?" I love conversation starters. It can be as simple as making a compliment on what they're wearing, doing, or driving.

The big mistake I think guys do make is to be scared off if they don't immediately get a huge "YES!" answer. Sometimes we're just caught off guard, deep in thought about something else, and it takes us a moment to process and respond to the inquiry. Dont give up right away.

Bonus points to the guy who will give me his number rather than asking me for mine. Guys who don't talk much but immediately ask for phone numbers come across as dishonest, as if they're players who count the number of phone #s they can collect in a day. Double bonus points if we swap numbers and you call me first.

[evevera]

I think it's great what you're doing. More guys should. Women find that stuff really hot!

However I remember I was on the bus once and this pretty good looking guy sat next to me and just said "Hi How are you?" Took me COMPLETELY by surprise. I'm usually in lala land when in a moving vehicle so I just kind of mutter "Good thanks" back lol. Thinking back I should have said more, but I was so shy and stuff back then, PLUS being shocked.

He changed seats shortly after that hahaha. But when I got off, he gave me a big smile. It was pretty flattering although I wish I hadn't of brushed him off like that. I think for guys starting this, definitely don't get discouraged if a girl isn't responsive at first, they're probably just in shock/don't know what to say/shy etc.

[bd90]

I think it's great what you're doing. More guys should. Women find that stuff really hot!

I'm glad you said that. Sometimes I get this idea that women would think I'm strange or creepy. But I'm not that type of guy. I'm just a fun loving person. But I'm curious to know why women find it hot? Is it because it takes confidence to approach a women?

I was at a bar. He came next to me, turned, smiled and said 'hi, can I buy you a drink?'. He seemed confident but not arrogant. Much later on in the conversation he admitted that he was scared stiff asking if he could buy me a drink, but he didn't want to appear desperate. Again, a touch of humour, something to make him human.

It's good to know that it's okay to feel nervous. I used to think that conversations between the opposite sex had to be perfect. Or that I needed to swoon a girl. Nowadays, I true to see the humor in interactions. I've come to realize that relationships and conversations grow organically. That's why they are so much fun. You never know what's going to happen.

bd90- It's true about making the girl feel special. However, be careful not to pull out the cliches. Some girls are romantic and love that stuff. But there are others who are turned off by it. Which kind of woman are you attracted to? A dreamer?

Women that are down-to-earth, fun loving, with a good heart? Vanity is such a turn off for me.

Another thing about the women who didn't smile back. Did you notice if they were sometimes the more attractive ones? Generally speaking I am flattered if a guy calls me beautiful. However, if it's done wrong I would get turned off. I know when I doll myself up I can be a head turner. If that's what I'm going for then a comment like you're beautiful is fine.

Yes, the ones that didn't smile back were younger/attractive? Normally I would tend to believe they were stuck up, but in reality I know that this is not true. So I've been working on changing my assumptions about beautiful women and people in general. From my experience, when I go out with no prejudgments about people things tend to turn out for the best.

My question to the women is:

What are some of the best/sincere compliments that you've gotten from men? Why was it so great? And how did it make you feel? Please reply. I think I could learn a lot from this.

Also, it seems like most relationships find each other through their friends. Have you ever dated a guy that was out of your circle of friends? Maybe someone you randomly met at a social function?

Thanks for the posts. I am learning a lot and validating a lot of beliefs I've felt to be true.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by The NorthStar of Hope

But Louise, seriously, how to distinguish between confidence and arrogance. I mean, I know I'm confident, but sometimes I fear to be misunderstood as "so full of himself" ...

I have a hard time seeing the difference too. Anytime a guy is being confident,to me it looks like he KNOWS he's hot,or he knows he's cool,and that alone is enough to turn me off. That's probably why i don't act confident (even if i was) because it gives off the vibe that you know you're King ****.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by bd90

Yes, the ones that didn't smile back were younger/attractive? Normally I would tend to believe they were stuck up, but in reality I know that this is not true.

Hold it right there LOL This sounds to me like a classic example of them being out of your league. Now dont get angry with me and say i'm stereotyping you,but that is exactly the kind of response i get from guys who skip over me and right over to the prettier sexier younger girls. Isn't that proof that leagues exist? I mean,they are obviously not stuck up to THEM. So yeah it isnt that they are stuck up people,they are just stuck up to people who are in lower leagues than them.

My question to the women is:

What are some of the best/sincere compliments that you've gotten from men? Why was it so great? And how did it make you feel? Please reply. I think I could learn a lot from this.

Gosh this is bad but i can't remember any off the top of my head. Maybe i have never gotten any. Well i'll tell you what i would like. To me,a good compliment would be in it's delivery,not even what was being said. I wouldn't want a compliment on how good i look in the situation where i am walking up to a guy and he first sees me and out it comes,right away! Exactly on time,exactly worded perfectly,just straight out of a fairy tale. *gag* I would rather have the guy keep it inside a while and then later sheepishly admit that he thought i was beautiful and he was afraid to say it or didnt know how to say it. I think i'd be all over him at that point

[stealth87]

I just want to challenge you a little bit. What is the purpose of approaching 200 women a day? Do you really care about the women and see them as human beings, or are they just your experiment to see if you can overcome your fear?

You are afraid because you have an agenda. What do you want to get from them? What outcome or reaction do you want to get? What would happen if you don't get it?

It seems to me like the whole idea of 'approach anxiety' is looked as if it was a disease to be eliminated. You have to 'fix' that, otherwise you are doomed. It means that you are a sore loser, and always have to be super suave and 'confident' to get the girl. Why bother with all these complicated nonsense and just switch to be truly authentic.

I wonder how your parents and my parents did it. I am pretty sure they did not read up on seduction material. Most of the seduction companies out there will tell you that it's OK to seek advice, and that guys don't usually do it because of their ego and because they think it's a sign of weakness. Well, you are really just learning to overcome your insecurities by depending on your 'success' or validation you get from women. Interesting.

Do you think that women can add or take anything from your being? If your sense of self was built on solid ground, then what is the need to get validation from women? This is your cure for approach anxiety. It is like trying to cure a tumor with painkillers (approaching to desensitize yourself) as opposed to removing it altogether. The true solution for this is not outside of yourself.

Regards,
Diego

[stealth87]

Oh by the way, on my previous post when I wrote

"It means that you are a sore loser, and always have to be super suave and 'confident' to get the girl."

I did not mean that to say anyone personally is a loser, rather what the action or situation implies. Just felt like I wanted to clarify that (English is not my first language )

Regards,
Diego

[spookie149]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Hold it right there LOL This sounds to me like a classic example of them being out of your league. Now dont get angry with me and say i'm stereotyping you,but that is exactly the kind of response i get from guys who skip over me and right over to the prettier sexier younger girls. Isn't that proof that leagues exist? I mean,they are obviously not stuck up to THEM. So yeah it isnt that they are stuck up people,they are just stuck up to people who are in lower leagues than them.

I agree, but that's not always the case. If a girl knows she's attractive and wants to be appreciated for something other than her looks, constantly getting approached by men solely attracted by her could be a turn off. Gal at my work is a stunner, and sometimes this happens to her.

[bd90]

I just want to challenge you a little bit. What is the purpose of approaching 200 women a day? Do you really care about the women and see them as human beings, or are they just your experiment to see if you can overcome your fear?

Yes, this was an experiment to see what would happen. I learned that it's perfectly normal to just say hi. Yes I do care. I don't think I was being rude.

You are afraid because you have an agenda. What do you want to get from them? What outcome or reaction do you want to get? What would happen if you don't get it?

I don't want to get anything from them. I think that's the whole point. To not be worried about the outcome. Just be.

Why bother with all these complicated nonsense and just switch to be truly authentic.

How do you do this?

Do you think that women can add or take anything from your being? If your sense of self was built on solid ground, then what is the need to get validation from women? This is your cure for approach anxiety. It is like trying to cure a tumor with painkillers (approaching to desensitize yourself) as opposed to removing it altogether. The true solution for this is not outside of yourself.

Good point. I sometimes think that being in a relationship validates me as a man. I think a lot of it is just years of social conditioning. The reality is I know that's not true, but those feelings are still there.

I know that approach anxiety will always be there. I'm not trying to eliminate. I'm just trying to work with it so that it doesn't paralyze me to not take any action at all. In some ways, its actually a rush to do something that exactly what you fear.

The point of my assignment was not to be manipulative to anyone and I sure hope I haven't been. The point is for me to build confidence. It's just like anything you learn in life. There is that awkward stage. I have found that as I take action, I get momentum, I feel better, my confidence builds.

Thanks for the challenge Diego. Good questions.

[evevera]

I'm glad you said that. Sometimes I get this idea that women would think I'm strange or creepy. But I'm not that type of guy. I'm just a fun loving person. But I'm curious to know why women find it hot? Is it because it takes confidence to approach a women?

Yes confidence! 90% of the guys out there have zero clue about approaching women or how to treat women on a date. If you get your game down, you'll be able to allow the woman to relax and open up easily around you.

What are some of the best/sincere compliments that you've gotten from men? Why was it so great? And how did it make you feel? Please reply. I think I could learn a lot from this.

This is such a hard one to naswer. I think the best compliments are ones coming from your lover. They mean the most to me and the ones that make me feel the warmest.... It doesn't matter so much wat he says tho. That probably doesn't help you much. Perhaps telling someone they look like "hot celebrity" is pretty good. Someone said I looked a bit like Jessica Alba in a picture I had up... and I definitely DON'T (I'm asian) hahaha but still wasn't bad hehe.

[kpreston]

I had a sort of epiphany today that is somewhat related to this post.

I have this thing I do with friends and co-workers. Any time they are on the phone, I'll repeat "Kyle says hi" until they eventually say hi. It's just for fun, and most of my co-workers will do it without my say (even when they're talking to a computer or 411 operator).

Today, one of my co-workers was ignoring me, so I wrote a sticky note that read: "Kyle says: 'hi.'" and stuck it to her phone. She gave in, said hi, and placed the sticky note on my shirt. I forgot that it was on my shirt and went about my business.

Throughout the day, while in public, I noticed many people (mostly women), would come up to me and say "tell Kyle I said hi." This was from people that I would normally shy away from.

It just goes to show that a majority of people are really more friendly and open to conversation than I previously gave them credit for.

[TonyToneTone]

Good story Kyle. I am now off to go find a sticky and write "Tony says hi" on it