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11-22-2008, 11:17 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Northern California
Posts: 3,030
  |  Important lesson
Very hard lesson to learn... I realized the thing sabotaging my relationships, was not having room/space for them. And how did this happen? In my early twenties, when I was desperately lonely, I learned to fill up that empty space. With activities that had a solipsistic and addictive quality, and with people that weren't mates but actually kept me from having suitable mates. So, I learned, about the empty space... don't fill it with anything you can't share (such as a hobby or spiritual practice that you can later share with a partner), that doesn't connect you to the community, or with a person who isn't the person you actually want to be with (no relationships of convenience!), or that doesn't help you grow. This stuff actually sabotaged two relationships. I didn't even see it at the time. |
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