Problems with Authority

[straysweeper]

I figured since this had to do with other people, I'd post here.

I've just been told that I have problems with Authority. I like to do things my own way, and don't listen to Bosses. Now, I've known that I can be stubborn. That I have strong opinions and when I understand something I don't like to be micromanaged. Yet, I've never thought about it in this way, or to this degree. Is this really a bad thing? Or could it be an asset if used properly? Saying its a bad thing, how do I become aware of it when its happening and curb it?

I was just telling the person who told me this, that I don't like to be micromanaged. When I know the result I'm going after, I like to have few guidelines and be left to go after it. I don't like to be micromanaged, and doing it the way of a control freak.

[eskimo]

there's nothing wrong with being able to grasp the concept of a project or assignment and independently seeing it through to completion. most corporations and bosses value independent, "self-starters" who take responsibility for the work they're assigned and ensure it gets completed to everyone's satisfaction.

but in any organization, there's a reporting structure and hierarchy that's essential to its basic function and an employee is merely one part of this whole structure. any work you're privileged to have been charged with is your responsibility but paradoxically is for the benefit of the collective organization (not just you) - meaning, you take the burden of that assignment but you should not expect any of the rights or rewards of it.

thus, not only your boss should have a say in the direction of your work not only at the beginning, but also during, and any revisions at the end, but anyone else you work with, including your boss' boss, their boss, even your colleagues, and even the admin asst supporting the dept should have a say in the direction of your work (and for good measure, i'll also throw in your boss' fourth cousin here - do you get my point!?!?).

a boss who micromanages to suffocation is not good for anybody, will thwart your development, and is more than likely attributable to that individual's personality, but nevertheless, he/she is your boss and occupies an essential position in the grand framework of the organization. there are work-arounds to a micromanaging personality but the less you focus on others' issues and the more you focus on your own blocks to successful organizational relationships, the better you'll be in the long-run. it all first starts within.

i hope i connected with my point here. feel free to ask if you want some more.

steve

[straysweeper]

Personal initiative is sometimes my problem. Either I don't take it in some areas or I take it in areas that aren't productive in their grand scheme. It has occurred to me that people treat this as I don't listen, or am not coachable. Where as from my point of view its a little more being rigid in my receptive to other people.

There are some subtleties of things I tend to miss completely, while others I grasp almost immediately. While I can understand the dichotomy of how the business operates on one side while aspects on other levels are sometimes overlooked. This will have to be bridged in some fashion in order for me to reach my goal. Someone recently told me, if your too big to follow your too small to lead. I think this applies somewhere in here.

My brain is fried, time to go do insect like things.

[sepiagal]

I think this can be a common issue. If a person grew up in a family where they were told things like "this is my house so you will live by my rules" then a person feels they don't like being under their boss's thumb. Sometimes its not what is said but how it is said that leaves a lasting impression.

If you were lead to believe that you can only be the decision maker when you move out then you may feel driven to be independent of people giving you rules to follow (micromanaging you).

And there may not have been things said that overtly indicated a lack of autonomy; it may have been just overly controlling parents. If you were micromanaged as a child then - told how to do things step by step - then you want your freedom from this as an adult.

A person's first authority figure is their parents. Any problem with authority is usually about some kind of issue with parents that hasn't been worked through.

Most people need some kind of therapy to resolve these issues with parents being inappropriate authority figures.

[eskimo]

Well I hope I didn't come across as too harsh, straysweeper. Initiative is good but in order to see how it can be applied to fit into the grand scheme of things, you've got to collaborate and partner with those above you who, by virtue of their position alone, have information you don't have and can see things that you may not.

Here's some information I got in chapel one day when I did my summer strategic planning internship at World Vision. I truly enjoyed that experience and receiving this nugget of wisdom is one of the things I valued most from it. I think it may help in your situation.

Our Greatest Needs
Pride vs. Humility
by Joy Dawson

Pride is self-centered; Humility carries the concerns of others
Pride isolates itself from others; Humility sees the need of others
Pride enjoys independence and likes to function alone; Humility enjoys teamwork
Pride encourages separatism; Humility unifies
Pride is cold, aloof & withdrawn; Humility is warm, outgoing and responsive
Pride is sophisticated; Humility is childlike
Pride is complex; Humility is simple
Pride is impatient; Humility is longsuffering
Pride is critical of others; Humility encourages others
Pride is resentful; Humility forgives and forgets
Pride seeks to impress others; Humility is to be known for what we really are
Prided is deceitful; Humility is transparently honest
Pride revels in the adulation of man; Humility automatically gives God the Glory
Pride fears men and their reactions; Humility fears God and cares only for His reaction
Pride makes excuses; Humility communicates the whole truth
Pride justifies; Humility quickly acknowledges failure
Pride covers sin; Humility confesses, repents and makes restitution
Pride envies another's promotion/advantages; Humility rejoices and gives honor
Pride is more excited about sharing knowledge; Humility is more excited about learning
Pride is self-absorbed; Humility is sensitive to others
Pride argues with God; Humility submits and accepts His will
Pride insists on proving that we are right; Humility relinquishes that right
Pride rebels against authority; Humility submits
Pride resists correction; Humility is grateful for it
Pride is cynical; Humility believes and trusts
Pride thinks "What they need to learn from me."; Humility thinks, "What can I learn from them?"
Pride seeks the recognition of others; Humility is content with obscurity

[dancer]

Does your boss micromanage everybody or just you?

I've been blessed when it comes to managers, however, I did have one that drove me nutty. When I noticed he was micromanaging everyone, I understood he had a trust issue and this helped me deal with him. Shortly after, I was assigned to another manager who trusted I would deliver and was available when I needed to bounce ideas.

If he is only doing it with you, then I would ask to meet with him to discuss the issue. This would require you to listen generously to his suggestions and to agree together on a solution.

Good luck.

[funchy]

The thing is that there are times in your life when you will be given instructions be someone and you will NEED to follow them.

You can't expect the world to change because it makes you uncomfortable to have to give up a little control or pride in the task. Sometimes there are things more important than your feelings.

Do you have a problem? I can't say; I have never met you. But if others are telling you and you are aware you're resisting a boss or teacher's instructions, maybe you do. Even if you're not lashing out every time at an authority figure, just the fact you get furious when someone gives you extra instructions indicates this may be something in need of improvement. No, you don't have to change. But you'll actually be happier if you're not having to work through lots of resistance every time you're assigned something (or worse having to find a new job). I am not saying be a sheep; I am saying don't let your feelings control you to the point you can't finish a project or keep a boss' respect.

Why do you resist authority? Perhaps contemplate that question for awhile.