It hurts. It sucks. I feel the same way. All through my young adult life I've just never been able to connect with anyone, always the odd one out, few friends, etc. I always got mad when I saw people who seemed to be having fun with friends, because I didn't have that and I can't really figure out why. Maybe distant relationship with my father growing up? Maybe I'm just selfish? I don't know. But here's what has worked for me:
In August of 2008 I found myself at work feeling awful, alone, unloved. I felt I didn't have a friend in the world. Even the people who were nice to me, I felt like I was using them to get attention. So, I did something about it. The next day, during my commute in the morning, instead of listening to music, I repeated to myself(out loud), "I am an amazing young man, people love and respect me. Every day I radiate charisma, charm, confidence, and positive energy." I kept doing that over the course of several weeks and by the time I left the job(about 8 months later), I felt that everyone in the office loved me. I went to the movies multiple times with some of the friends I made there, and we ended up calling ourselves "The Dream Team." One of these friends even told me that while people in the office gossip and talk trash about everyone else, NO ONE talks trash about me. All of this happened so naturally and gradually that I didn't even realize that a change had taken place until months later when I quit. So don't give up! You can make some major changes in your life. I'd suggest reading "What To Say When You Talk To Yourself" by Helmstetter. And best of luck to you.
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12-03-2009, 01:33 AM
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