Blocking feelings or waiting for her...

[arena2]

Hey guys,
I need some seriosu imput on this girl that I have been talking too, but first I need to explain a little bit about myself.

I am almost 21 and I have never been in a relationship. I do feel like i am ready though because i have been experimenting heathily, and i am emotionaly ready. Reguardless, this girl is waiting for this guy and they have been dating for just about 2 years. He cheated on her and she has made it clear that if she wasnt with him she would be with me. He hasnt been home for months because of leave in the forces and we just have been connecting so well. She does talk to him on occassion on the phone. She said that I should never wait for anyone, but thats kindof hypocritical because she is doing that, and she told me not to do that but I feel like she wants me to wait for her. We also just talk so well and i feel like i should. I am a difficult person as it is and i cannot find a girl quickly at all, so when moments like this happen I make sure i am not passing them up because they are so rare. I told her to stop talking to me because I liked her so much and together we thought it would be a good idea because something may happen if we stay talking, and when I say talking, we talked for hours on hours. But recently I have been talking to her and I have accepted that I cannot do anything with her because she is with this guy. I feel like she atill wants to conintue to talk to me until she has a reason to end it with that other guy though. I will respect everything and i will never cheat but should I even wait for this girl? I do have crazy feelings for her and I like her allot and I know she has the same feelings for me but this guy who hasnt even been there for her over the past year is a problem. I need help please and thanks....

[JimOfferman]

Sounds like she is keeping you at arms length, "just in case." What you have to ask yourself: is that good enough for you?

Personally, I'd rather be with one of the many, many women who are present and available for an actual (romantic) relationship.

[arena2]

Well for me, i find it difficult to open up and build a relationship with a new person over and over again...it just seems really hard...but recently i have been feeling more open reguardless. I let her know that I am there if something happens but i wont be waiting for her, as it seems.....