Some revelations of a young adult...

[Rabbit]

I hope I can put my troubled thoughts into a coherent message and not end up rambling... somebody slap me if that happens .

I like to think of myself as an observant and seasoned (note: not necessarily wise) guy. As a 21 year old college student, I have seen many things, unfortunately more bad than good. I have been through personal crises and obtained the deep lessons that follow. I just want to preface this information so that I don't come of sounding like a whiny kid; on the contrary, I think that I have enough experience seeing this world to have a valid complaint.



But on to the good stuff: anyone who is introspective and sees what I see will invariably feel a bit depressed by this too. This 'life' that we have built, that our parents have built, that our parents' parents have built... it sucks!

I'm definitely not one to discount the little things in life that provide us with pleasure or the sense of wellness we obtain from relationships or accomplishment from work and etc.

I guess my main argument is that I can see the rather large facets of our lives (relationships/marriage, careers, building wealth and security ala the american dream) and I can see how they are so completely disappointing in general.



I've always been put off of the idea of graduating college because I am absolutely pissed that I will have to enter the workforce. I see my own father- an ingenious and productive man, who fought his way through poverty, through a rather large company to a respectable position- and I know that financial freedom/supporting a family makes him proud and happy.

I also see him working 60-80 hours a week, I see him literally being worked to death! Maybe this isn't typical for some or most of you... but the fact of the matter is it's generally agreed that hard work and time, time, time are required. I don't think I am comfortable with that idea!

Perhaps I just need to change my outlook on work... or find a career that I literally love doing so much that all of the mundane aspects are exciting... fat chance.



Another thing that has really been bothering me lately is that one of my parents' best friends are going through a separation quite suddenly. The husband recently proclaimed he has been unhappy for a while, and the wife is crushed. Divorce is not an uncommon thing; in fact, one of my best friends' parents were divorced when he was just a child, and my mother's parents did the same, etc.

I support divorce, especially if people are not happy in their relationship. But what does this mean for those of us in the rising generation who are about to get married? I've been in a relationship before where I was unhappy for a while, and to the detriment of my partner, I left. I've had my heart good and broken too. But marriage is supposed to be permanent... and people are supposed to communicate.

For all I know my mother or father could secretly be unhappy in their long marriage. And although such an admission, and the ensuing divorce, would not really crush me, it would have a much more subtle depressing effect. The same one I'm feeling when I heard about these family friends. I mean how many of these kinds of people in these relationships believe that they are completely secure and know what their partner is feeling? How often do you sit down and think about how much of your life is based around your current/future marriage? What do you think you'd do if this happened to you?



So I guess I'm trailing off at this point... Don't get me wrong, I'm no anarchist and I'm not calling for a revolution. I generally have a very positive outlook on life and my future. But what does it mean when you look around and see all of the institutions that your leaders and ancestors and parents built crumble? What does it mean when you realize that they have been crumbling on the periphery for a long time?

[Eric Revelin]

It means that it is time for revolution. Not a violent, "burn the white house down!" kind of revolution, but one wherein we take our fates into our own hands and build something stronger upon the ashes of the past.

What you're identifying is the insanity in the way things were, the way things have been, and the side-effects it's had on your fathers and upon you. The future is bright because it's in our hands. It's proper to mourn when we see tragedy in what has unfolded, not because of the toll it's taken, but because it is the catharsis that enables regeneration.

Being 21, I know where you come from. I felt depressed about it up until this year. I have found solace in the knowledge that we've been given an opportunity to create something far better than anyone who's lived before could ever dream.

[Pequod]

It's a good thing that you see through the lives of most people in society. To know what you don't want is the first step to knowing what you do want.

So now you've seen trought the illusion of the ordinary, living-like-a-sheep-in-the-herd life, what do you want? Which kind of life would really excite you?

[Jamie]

I'd also say, never ever ever feel bad about yourself, if you feel you don't quite 'gel' with the world, or you find yourself at odds with the world.

The fact that you do feel at odds with the world, actually means you're quite sane (though perhaps a few people, who are so conditioned by the mechanics of society, won't see that, but in reality, they're the ones' who are lost).

Trust and follow your inner guidance..

All the best,
Jamie.

[richie111]

You can make your life what you want it to be.
Kool, you learned whats good for you and what not, now just create the life you want.

[Parthon]

I would say 95% of what society says you should want, is crap. Like what Jamie says, but I see that 90% of people believe it and buy into the society loop.

There's the work->earn->consume->work loop that's just insane. You work to pay for things you don't need so you feel better temporarily in order to go back to work.

There's the idea that you decide when you are 20 what you are going to do the next 50 years, after you've been an adult for a whole 2 minutes, relatively. I still say people don't really become adults until they are in their late to mid 20s, with rare exceptions.

And there's the pressure from society to go for security and wealth. You need to do certain things in order to survive, and protect your future. I see it as a load of bull. Your life slips away while you struggle to protect the unprotectable, all the while running the same old treadmill and competing in contests that aren't worthy.

If this all makes you feel a little lackluster and kind of apathetic, then it's not suprising, and you aren't alone. The tricky question is: How do you get off the bandwagon? How do you get off the beaten path and take a different road? How can you use your strengths and talents to do what you love and what you most connect with? That's a question that only you can answer, but until you do it, you aren't really living.

I know that not everyone can be movie stars and astronauts, but why not you? There's plenty of people aspiring to be on the bottom rung of society and run the rat race like everyone else, so the top of the ladder is relatively free. Come play.