Anyone Have Any Experence With Energy Vampires...

[chihuahuaking88]

... and possibly how to deal with them, especially if they're someone you live with and love dearly? I'm exploring a recent development/realization in my life.

[mezameo]

Originally Posted by chihuahuaking88

... and possibly how to deal with them, especially if they're someone you live with and love dearly? I'm exploring a recent development/realization in my life.

I found that having a real purpose independent of them helps a lot. So does being very clear about your boundaries and what you have to offer.

Secondly, I often become affected by them when I am lacking purpose in my daily activities. If you keep yourself focused on what you need rather than what they need, you can usually discover there are times when their demands are not so taxing on you. This is when you can be there as a lover or a friend.

On Steve's blog he talked about how for men relationships come second after your own development. Keep that in mind when you feel tortured and manipulated by your lovely "vampire" =)

Best of luck. Don't forget to get some exercise and clear your head of the bllodsucker at least once a day, it does wonders =)

[funchy]

If it's a loved one who is draining you this much, it could be he/she is passive aggressive. I've found that those are the kind of people who are the most exhausting for me to deal with.

The reality is if the person is passive-aggressive, there's nothing you can do to change them. You can read up on it and learn about coping strategies. But you'll NEVER make them into someone who brings positive energy into your home.

[TonyToneTone]

They hate garlic and sunlight

Start focusing on what you like about the other person so you will draw more of that into your life. Look for the good in them, it is there. Keep yourself in a positive vibe. If you cannot do anything about them, i.e. they enjoy being negative then by all means stay away from them.

[mej023]

Originally Posted by TonyToneTone

They hate garlic and sunlight

Start focusing on what you like about the other person so you will draw more of that into your life. Look for the good in them, it is there. Keep yourself in a positive vibe. If you cannot do anything about them, i.e. they enjoy being negative then by all means stay away from them.

That is very good advice. Find something to appreciate about the person. Pretty soon your thoughts will define your reality.

If you keep looking at "what is" then what is, is what you will get (or more of the same).

Find something to appreciate and that vibration will only attract that vibration. It is law.

[chihuahuaking88]

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone who gave me their answers. ^^

[Alexjstrandberg]

Hey,

A good way of dealing with energy vamps is by not dealing with them and giving your energy to them. A typical thing that people do is try to change who they are instead of letting them be. We typically try to change the things we don't like in others that we don't like in ourselves. So, if you find yourself annoyed when you are being energy vamped odds are that you do the same thing. Once you find out how they are reflecting yourself go internally and change your own energy vamping ways.

From there figure out what your tolerance level for energy vamps and stick to it. Almost everyone is an energy vamp to some degree, find out your own tolerance level. For me, I can't stomach poor me's with victim mentalities. Hearing other people's problems that intend to do nothing about it is something I won't stick around for. I figure out who is a poor me and who genuinely wants to make changes by asking them "ok, what are you doing about it?" The ones with victim mentalities usually get flustered and quickly go back to their complaining.

Another great way of dealing with them is by stopping them before they go full out in energy vamping. A typically energy vamp that I see in people is an interrogator type that wants you to believe what they do by breaking down your reality-they offer a lot of unsolicited advice.

The way to stop them is by being sure of what you believe first. If you are unsure of your beliefs or your actions then you will find yourself arguing with them or even trying to convince them of what you believe. Without being sure you won't be able to stop them from giving that oh so annoying unsolicited advice.

With people that are pretty bad energy vamps you need to set up boundaries. Tell them "advice when asked for" not in a condescending way but more of a matter of fact kind of way. You are probably going to have to repeat that many times before they get the idea. Be firm with them. Over time you will be able to talk normally without the nasty feeling in your gut when you are being energy vamped.

You must eliminate all fear of lose. Some people are easy to handle and others will not stop. The less happy a person is the more inclined they are to give advice and energy vamp you. People who are really bad you might have to walk away from them completely. If you fear losing them then you will stick it out while you feel worse and worse when you are around them.

good luck

[Epiphany]

Hi and good luck with the vampire.
My roommate is a psychic vampire. She makes me feel so sick sometimes!
I just stopped hanging around with her, I can't stand her ''evil eye''.
Avoid them as much as possible and if you have to be around them just try not to listen to what they are saying, they will just drain you. I usually have a hand of miriam amulet on me, I think it helps!