Me And My Friend Has Drifted Apart And This Shall Not Stand!

[Matt Willard]

So I've got this girl I know online. We met two-three years ago. We chatted a lot to begin with, telling stories to each other. When we stopped doing that, we kinda just drifted apart without anything to connect us. Nowadays she doesn't really come on AIM much, and when I try to communicate through emails, she often doesn't reply. She's basically told me that the only real way I'm going to see her often anymore is to join her World of Warcraft server and play with her, which I won't because I don't like that game for multiple reasons. I don't think she really hates me, I'm just not that important to her anymore, I guess.

This totally sucks, as you can see. At one time I had an insane crush on her which has simmered down these days, and I can usually get along fine without her, but when she jumps on AIM or we chat in some way, I realize I still want her as a close friend. Whether there is a spark or not between us doesn't interest me as much as perserving this friendship. Any help toward the matter would be swell.

[persephonevii]

Hey,

I'm in sort of the same boat as you sort-of. Except I'm not in love with my friend in that way

Anyway, I figured this. You have a couple of options:

A) Join WOW and talk to her.

B) Don't join WOW but keep talking when you can.

C) Just let her go.

It sounds to me as if she really is not that interested in you, because if she was she would probably be chatting and emailing you a lot more than now. And I think even if you did join WOW, it might not change... she'd only pay attention to you because you joined WOW. Not because of any special qualities or other interests that you have and she likes. So basically, you'd have a relationship based on WOW

So if I were you, I'd let her go. Maybe oneday she'll come back to you and start talking again, maybe she won't... either way, it's okay.

I know that you feel some sort of close connection with her, but again its all one-sided. Maybe what you feel is a longing for the old times when you both were close, or you do have genuine feelings but they just ain't being returned. Either way it sucks, but that's how the ball rolls. Anyway, wish you well on whatever you choose

[Remiel]

Oh dear.... another victim.

I think like persephonevii said you really only have 3 options. I'd recommend against A) though. Its a pretty bad thing to get sucked into an mmo (speaking from experience). I know that for myself I played games for 3 reasons.
1. I used it to avoid life / responsiblity
2. I could become that avatar. I was very uncomfortable with who I was due to aspergers so it was a nice escape.
3. It easily made use of my talents.

I have no clue if your friend is escaping with wow. I do know that its not a positive thing.

[Matt Willard]

Hey, I did my time on WoW, I'm not particularly eager to play it again. But, you know, she deserves to hear my side of the story, that I can't play this game anymore if she's really not interested in me. She is kinda on the ropes lately about her friends seeming to be leaving all around her. She's a good person, I honestly believe that, but she's been depressed before because she has thought that she drives others away because of her stubborness. Still, I can't let this string me along, even if she honestly have no bad intentions.