falling in love with yourself

[Spartan]

I love myself. I am so amazingly talented, intelligent, good looking, funny, physically fit and healthy! Did I mention successful? That too!

When I look in the mirror I feel like I'm falling in love for the first time, my knees turn to jelly and I get butterflies in my stomach. It is so incredibly moving, it's like I'm having a religious experience. It's like I'm actuallly looking in to the eyes of God himself, yet my eyes are even more perfect! Oh how magnificent those beautiful eyes are, I could write a billion poems in their honour. It's a truly remarkable experience! I just want to bask in the glory of my incredible reflection and cherish the wonderful memory for the rest of my life!

In fact, I think the whole world should stop everything they're doing, gather up their life savings, prepare an offering of all their wordly possessions, and then go on a pilgrimage to meet me the great man himself!

When people meet me they will tremble in awe unable to speak, since my sheer greatness will overwhelm them. However, they will be shown mercy and I will allow them to kneel before me, kiss my feet and submit their will to to my divine greatness.

Finally, when I die God will bow down before me and cry like a little school girl as he begs for mercy. Then I will rightfully take my thrown as ruler of heaven and master of the universe!