Can someone know Me better than I know Myself?

[freestate]

Hi, everybody.

Occasionally, I hear someone within my family tell me "I know you better than you know yourself" and proceed to tell me why they think I'll either change a course of action or not pursue it at all.

Personally, I don't think this true, at least not in my case. I've spent a great deal of time over the course of my life in self-reflection and I believe my self-awareness to be above-average.

As I was considering this, I wondered what you smart people think of this. No doubt you've heard this line before. What do you think? Can someone know you better than you know yourself?

Thanks.

[{aspiring_to_clarity}]

I think very often people who are close to us (and, heck, sometimes even strangers) can see things that we are blind to ourselves. I know it's been true for me, and I also consider myself quite self-aware...well, at least I spend a lot of time thinking about things and feel like I understand myself. Yet, others hold up a mirror to us sometimes to parts of ourselves we just don't see from the inside.

[Dannyboy1]

Originally Posted by {aspiring_to_clarity}

I think very often people who are close to us (and, heck, sometimes even strangers) can see things that we are blind to ourselves. I know it's been true for me, and I also consider myself quite self-aware...well, at least I spend a lot of time thinking about things and feel like I understand myself. Yet, others hold up a mirror to us sometimes to parts of ourselves we just don't see from the inside.

Relatives aren't usually the best judge because they see you as the child you've always been. Also, they judge way to harshly much of the time. I'm not saying ignore it, but friends or a psychologist would be a better, less biased judge.

[{aspiring_to_clarity}]

That's true as well. I use the measure of whether I feel compelled to defend myself. That's usually a good indicator that there's something there to look at one way or another...which doesn't always mean the other person was right in their assesment either.

[Brutha]

I don't think that people know themselves very well.
On the other hand a lot of people who say: "I know you better than you know yourself", don't know either much about you.

There are three distinct things:
1) What you think about yourself.
2) What others think about you.
3) What's really the case.

A good psychologist for example that know you and has a relationship with you on the other hand might know more about you than you do yourself.

[Lanya]

Amnesia makes it easy.

[Jarrod]

Everybody knows others better than they know themselves. But these are only educated guesses so nobody knows anybody.

Only you can get first-hand knowledge about yourself, by watching yourself.

[Zwynd]

Originally Posted by freestate

Hi, everybody.

Occasionally, I hear someone within my family tell me "I know you better than you know yourself" and proceed to tell me why they think I'll either change a course of action or not pursue it at all.

Personally, I don't think this true, at least not in my case. I've spent a great deal of time over the course of my life in self-reflection and I believe my self-awareness to be above-average.

As I was considering this, I wondered what you smart people think of this. No doubt you've heard this line before. What do you think? Can someone know you better than you know yourself?

Thanks.

It's great they know who you are and where you stand in life because you can take comfort in the fact that for the most part they'll be reliable for you since they know what you need.

However, on the flip side, if they can guess you right down to every last action then you're definitely in heaps of trouble from a spiritual development route.

It means you're not changing and growing fast enough. You might not be exploring every possible thing you can for fun and growth.

If you can honestly think about your future in the next 10 years right down to where you're living, what friends you'll have and what you'll be doing on a typical Sunday night...then you might as well sign your Will now and lock it away till you die.

If this thought scares you then aim to do something unpredictable, fun and challenging every day from now on. You'll grow more holistically and likely have craploads more fun than you've been having.

My $0.02

[Remiel]

Yes and no.

Yes they can know aspects of you that you are blind to. Listen to their advice. However treat it as just that, advice.

No they cannot know fully. So listen to what they have to say and make your own decision. Perhaps you can tell them that you will weigh their advice carefully before making a decision? Then actually think about it and make your own decision.

[The Cloud]

Nobody can really know who you are, not even yourself. Perhaps other people can have a better interpretation than you in some areas of your life, otherwise therapies would be useless. In order for therapy to work, somebody has to see something in your words or actions that indicates a deeper meaning to who you are than you are aware of. But overall, you likely know yourself best.

[Tigerlilly]

If people tell you they know how you feel or think about something, and you know it's not so, you know they don't know you better than you know yourself and that they have no psychic abilities.

If people say it's so and it isn't you know they got it wrong. If their view of things doesn't match your own view of things, trust your own view and voice, it's the one you'll have to live with in the end.

All the same a lot of times( maybe even all the time) in some way the people around you reflect you -your feelings or your thoughts at that time- without sometimes even being aware of it themselves. They mirror parts of you, so by looking at what people around say, think and do you can find out about yourself and what really goes on behind the scenes in your life.

So the way I see it, yes, there is someone who knows you better than you know yourself, that's the source of souls, and to look for that voice expressing itself in what you gather as input you can learn about yourself.

[Angela]

I think others can give you a perspective on yourself that is not otherwise available to you, so it's a good idea to be grateful for feedback. And as The Cloud said, there's no real knowing anyway. But only you can determine your next right action. Anyone who tells you they know your next right action better than you do is singing the ca-ca song.

[Dharma]

Your family is a reflection of you. So take what they say into your self-reflection. It can totally differ from how you see yourself and still be valid.

Originally Posted by freestate

Can someone know you better than you know yourself?

Yes, if they have more consciousness and awareness than you.