Self-actualization... I get it

[25AndJustBeginning]

I stumbled across the idea of self-actualization a few years ago in a self-help book and was always intrigued by it. However, a few minutes ago I just got it.

I think I've always required an enabler to function- whenever I would do something I always imagined another person in the back of my mind that I would focus on rather than being in the moment actively choosing my actions- I've always attributed what I've done to someone or something else.

Recognizing this naturally yields more responsibility, responsibility for my thoughts, actions, moods, feelings, etc. It's very individuating, really. I'm already thinking about how it's going to change my life, change my outlook on situations. I'm actually pretty damn excited to... actually, I don't even know but I am excited!

Has anyone else had to realize this? I'm curious to hear others' tales of self-discovery & pillaging. Ok, no destructive looting but how about self-discovery?

[Jarrod]

I don't get it.

You let 'someone else' in your head do the work?

You are not responsible for your actions?

[25AndJustBeginning]

I think I attribute my actions to whatever/whomever I'm imagining in the back of my mind. I think it may be related to my struggles w/ criticism- like I'm always being watched so I have to perform. Maybe this really isn't the case and it's just a stepping stone. I am experiencing a lot of self-discovery right now and I may discard this but it does feel like a breakthru.

[Michael Chui]

Mm. You're close. You're on the cusp. The next step is for it to become natural. You need to say, "I am who I am," and not find anything particularly remarkable about that fact.

[25AndJustBeginning]

Originally Posted by Michael Chui

Mm. You're close. You're on the cusp. The next step is for it to become natural. You need to say, "I am who I am," and not find anything particularly remarkable about that fact.

It sounds like you're encouraging acceptance of myself/self-affirmation, which is a work in progress of mine. However, what do you mean about 'finding nothing particularly remarkable?' Are you referring to humbleness and not being arrogant?

[Michael Chui]

Originally Posted by 25AndJustBeginning

It sounds like you're encouraging acceptance of myself/self-affirmation, which is a work in progress of mine. However, what do you mean about 'finding nothing particularly remarkable?' Are you referring to humbleness and not being arrogant?

No. Think of electric lighting. Now, rewind a couple hundred years. What does electric lighting look like then? Ooh, aah. And today? It's a given. It's not something particularly remarkable. We've got computers and stuff.

It's not a matter of non-arrogance; it's a matter of seeing no need to focus on it, because there's nothing remarkable--nothing to remark on. You are you. Uh, surprise? Humility is a reasonable word for it, but it's too old a term to come without baggage, so I don't use it.

[25AndJustBeginning]

Originally Posted by Michael Chui

No. Think of electric lighting. Now, rewind a couple hundred years. What does electric lighting look like then? Ooh, aah. And today? It's a given. It's not something particularly remarkable. We've got computers and stuff.

It's not a matter of non-arrogance; it's a matter of seeing no need to focus on it, because there's nothing remarkable--nothing to remark on. You are you. Uh, surprise? Humility is a reasonable word for it, but it's too old a term to come without baggage, so I don't use it.

It sounds like you're talking about patient growth. Try but be understanding and patient.