i need your supports.

[Zane]

i'm in grade 11. I think i'm a good boy at school, i treat people well, and very few of them hate me. the problem is, i just feel so lonely when i'm in school. i do have friends, but i dont interest in what they do. i go to school and i try to do my best in study, but i feel so boring and can never be a part of them, isolated. Every breaktime i just find some quiet place and sit alone, and so on i become so negative to school, i dont wanna go there and prefer sitting at home. Some of my friends are deep, however i still cant involve in them (the other students i really cant stand with!! they are stupid). Actually, it's not so gloomy as i have some great moments, but most of the time i cant enjoy the school.
i would like to explain more clearly. My school is a high-level one,it costs much every month, but then i regret to have been a student of its, the school enviroment is filled with kids that only care about their appearance and to show how they spend money, really really stupid kids. And so, the school can't build a enviroment for studying and without discipline it's going down.

[The Cloud]

I understand the feeling that you're living in a world with people that don't make sense. They probably don't. But it is your choice whether or not you make that your problem. Their stupidity is not your stupidity, their shallowness is not your shallowness. You say you have a few close friends. Don't bother with the rest of the people. If you don't think they are worth your time, then don't waste time on them. Live your life for the things that you want. If you want to learn, nobody can't stop you. If you want to have fun, only you can make ignorant people a barrier. Don't waste your time judging them, they aren't worth the anger and the misery that you're putting yourself through on their behalf.

As for doing things you enjoy, you also have the choice to do that. Perhaps you could plan on doing something you enjoy, and then invite some of your close friends to do it with you. Then all the ignorant people won't get in the way, because you didn't invite them. Initiate your own fun, don't wait for somebody else to decide whether or not they want to do something that you like. Whether you believe it or not, it is you that is making yourself unhappy. Nobody else has control over your thoughts or your emotions, so it is you that is making yourself unhappy by connecting your happiness to people that aren't concerned with it. Connect your happiness to the things you do, and the person you are, and you will have full control over it and the ignorant people will never again be able to make your life miserable.

[Joely]

Hi Zane,

I can appreciate you struggling at school in an environment that doesn't suit learning. I went to a failing high school that was closed in 2000 (I left in 1995), and had a very poor academic record. Many of the classes were more about riot control than teaching.

Yet out of that, I have a degree and a PhD. It all depends on your attitude and how you approach school. As The Cloud has very wisely pointed out, you can choose whether this environment affects you negatively or not. You always have the choice in what happens to you. It really doesn't matter if people around you aren't living according to the same standards and ideals as you are - you can still do the work and whatever you need to do to get out of your school experience what you most want.

I found it tough at school because I was a deep thinker and quite lonely, but as I've grown older, I've relaxed a great deal and found people I can really connect with and love. I'm sure you'll find that too. Sometimes it's just a matter of accepting yourself and others just as you are.

Good luck,

J x

[bf1983]

Zane,

Keep on hanging in there, I know how you feel.

At the end of the day you are bigger than these guys and can rise above them. You will soon out-accelerate their growth, education and achievement in all areas.

You don't need to stoop to their levels to get on.

[Zane]

much appreciate! i got what you mean, the problem is i turn my attention on them and to judge them. The school provides good study conditions, and most of the students can't take it well! i feel i'm living with fools! they don't know how difficult to make money, everyday they come and talk together about where they hang out, where they eat, how much do their shoes cost...and when i hear that, i just...crazy! finally, i think the school gathers those like them and develope their negatives. And to be honest, some of the students are quite talented! but very few.. anyway, i'll try my best to get rid of them and to involve in my own things. Thanks.