Soul mate? Love and life partner? Both?

[marinik]

Originally Posted by James81

Once you start down the dark path.....

Lost soul... what can I say

[pyrogen]

I think that when people describe a soulmate, they are describing a certain type of chemistry and click. I don't know one way or the other whether it has to do with past lives.

I'm willing to accept "soulmate" as one particular relationship model. THere are many, many relationship models that are great for those in them. Plenty of non-soulmates achieve happiness together. I know plenty of people who do not want a soulmate relationship; it would be too intrusive and intense. The whole idea, too, is pretty much a Myers-Briggs NF-specific concept. Probably 90% of the world does not desire soulmate chemistry.

Here's what I observe about soulmate chemistry:

1) person matches a deep internal love map (google this)

2) their communication style is familiar to you, so that communication takes place easily. You speak the same language, more or less. It feels like picking up where you left off with an old friend, when you meet them.

3) They are subconsciously very familiar to you and it is very easy to be with them - often because they are similar to a parent - so you feel you already know them, and trust them quickly

4) you have quite a lot of interests in common, and many common values. You have so much in common that you can share a lot of space and time together without having to give up any part of yourself.

5) you feel completely accepted by this person

6) the relationship very quickly has a very deep level of intimacy because communication flows so well

and - much of the time -

7) you have consciously intended this, and so have they.

I've seen this over and over with successful soulmate matches... they report intending each other at the same time. This allows both people to be on the same relationship timeline.

I felt a strong soulmate type of chemistry with the guy I was recently dating, but he did not have a conscious blueprint going on, so we were not at all in sync with our intentions.

I write about this in my blog:

Alice in Blunderland: Love at first sight doesn't work if one of you needs glasses