Best "projects" to lose virginity for a 22 year old virgin

[HipHipHooray]

I am 22 and a virgin. I have many long term goals, but I have just decided to simplify everything and make my one and only goal (for right now) to GET LAID!

I know a lot of you will think this is shallow.... blah blah blah. I respect your opinion but please don't post something about how I should be thinking about other things, or getting in touch with my inner child; it will fall upon deaf ears. This is something I have to do. Also, I know I can go to a hooker... but it is illegal, and I don't want to risk getting caught. I would also like my first time to be with a decent looking girl and not someone with a slew of stds.

Now, i've decided to follow, atleast somewhat, steve's action outline scheme (using goals and projects). I have my goal: to get laid. But, I need help with choosing the most effective "projects"

Here is a list of some problems I have in no particular order:

Can't drive / no license/ no car
no job
have social phobia
about 20-30lbs overweight
no friends or social life of any kind except family

Now, here are the projects I have selected in order of priority:

Get over social phobia
Get job
Learn to drive/Get license
Lose 5 inches on waste (35inch)/ get down to 15% body fat
Improve appearance (i dont know how to make this one measurable)
Become more independent (same with this one)

Do you think these are the best projects? How can I make the last two measurable, or do you think I should even bother making them measurable?

[MmeIntentional]

Hi HipHipHooray

Is it that you only just want to get laid or do you want a relationship?

Because i think if your thinking that you just want to get laid there is nothing wrong with seeing a pro and they are likely to have std's check ups more than any other folk... dependiing if she is classy or work on the streets.

But honesty i would focus on your social life etc. then the event will come up. Also for some reason I would of made your list a with your improve appearance/self confidence, weight at the top because if you meet someone now you will be still worried about it. However I'm not you and you are just doing/listing things in the way you see fit for yourself.

I had a old friend who still a virgin at 31 years old. He wasn't waiting for the right one etc. he was also very good chatting to females but never quite made it to the bedroom dept. Anyways this guy is now married with 2 kids

[Addict]

I also might suggest focusing on a relationship, but if you don't want to hear that you, you don't want to hear it.

Improve appearance (i dont know how to make this one measurable)

Part of it will be your body fat, which is easily measurable. You could start lifting weights and that's measurable too. Are you worried about clear skin or something? Maybe you could focus on that and take photographs to see if you are making a difference. For everything else, just identify a list of things you can act on right now. For instance, buying new clothes, getting a better haircut maybe. Every time you complete one, you will know you are getting closer. These things are superficial, but they will help you with your confidence.

And yes, you need to be more independent.

[MartialDev]

Sign up for a dance class. It will solve many of your problems.

[Shamou]

Originally Posted by HipHipHooray

I am 22 and a virgin. I have many long term goals, but I have just decided to simplify everything and make my one and only goal (for right now) to GET LAID!

You are making a federal case out of a molehill... most girls your age who are not already in a relationship want the same thing that you do...

If you see affluence everywhere... that is, girls who are ready and willing to get in on with you... you'll score in no time...

Stop living in a world or scarcity... hundreds of girls probably have already hit on you... you were just too blind to see it...

Keep your eyes open... and your dream will come true...

Best of luck to you...
.

[Brien]

I agree with Shamou, you can achieve your goal faster by a change in mentality. Approach it this way: if you had already gotten laid, what would be different? Among other things, you probably would realize that it is not that difficult to take a woman to bed. You would recognize the myriad opportunities when you saw them.

That's not to say that your projects will not help you, but approach them with a different mentality. You are not taking them on in order to get laid. You are doing them BECAUSE you have sex regularly already. It's part of who you are.

[HipHipHooray]

Originally Posted by Shamou

You are making a federal case out of a molehill... most girls your age who are not already in a relationship want the same thing that you do...

If you see affluence everywhere... that is, girls who are ready and willing to get in on with you... you'll score in no time...

Stop living in a world or scarcity... hundreds of girls probably have already hit on you... you were just too blind to see it...

Keep your eyes open... and your dream will come true...

Best of luck to you...
.

this is exactly the kinda thing I was looking for. BUT... having this mentality doesn't change the fact that I get nervous... and I have poor social skills.

If I had this mentality I think it would help, but without the stuff to follow through, what good is it?

[caesar8181]

Originally Posted by HipHipHooray

this is exactly the kinda thing I was looking for. BUT... having this mentality doesn't change the fact that I get nervous... and I have poor social skills.

If I had this mentality I think it would help, but without the stuff to follow through, what good is it?

Get a Job...any job, it will help with self-confedence. Its also a great way to meet new people.........and get money. I have met a some great girls through work.

[Shamou]

Originally Posted by HipHipHooray

this is exactly the kinda thing I was looking for. BUT... having this mentality doesn't change the fact that I get nervous... and I have poor social skills.

If I had this mentality I think it would help, but without the stuff to follow through, what good is it?

Hate to tell you this... but why don't you like most guys do... go to a disco and take a few beers (two at the most) ...that will get rid of your inhibition and you'll be the next stud in town...

Just make sure that you don't have to drive (though that should not be a problem for now since you can't drive.)

And the best of luck to you...
.

[NotesMaeve]

From one of my favorite plays, The Producers, "If you've got it, flaunt it." What Shamou said about abundance is absolutely right. Figure out your assets, get buzzed, and go for it.

As a pretty woman, I could care less about wealth or muscles. What is hot is a guy who takes care of himself and has confidence in his talents.

[Michael Chui]

There is no such thing as "poor social skills". There is only "not practicing your social skills".

[Christian223]

I just readed "social phobia" there, and i have something that will help you get rid of that, i want to share it with you because i know it works, it worked for me personally and it has changed my life, this tool is a little weird, but it works very fast, and its free, go to Tapping.com - Free EFT Videos - Emotional Freedom Technique to see some free video to get started fast, dont be decieved by how ridiculous it looks, it simply works, and it will help you a lot, as it did with my, also check the link at my sig, good luck!.

[Truefire]

ummm... wow.

If you want to get laid, and only laid, I have a quick fix. You can get laid in a few days, guaranteed.

1) Go buy some nice/hip clothes, put them on. (avoid Dockers type brands, look for Deisel etc.)
2) Go buy some nice beer(makes you feel all classy), drink it.
3) You're old enough, so go to the bar, stand tall and do the following.

Introduce your self by smiling and saying, "Hi! My name is ________," while sticking out your hand for a handshake. She will usually say "hi" and shake your hand.

Proceed to ask, "How about a f***?"
If she says yes, then figure out where and how the two of you will go about your business, take a taxi as both of you are probably tanked.
If she says no, move on to the next girl/girls.
If you get no "yes" answers move to the next bar/club and continue.
4) keep drinking.

**note2, this only works in bars and clubs, where absolutely idiotic behaviour is permitted**

**note3, you might not want to sleep with the girls who say "yes!"**

This actually works and has been tested, about 1 in 25 will say yes or play along.
Now go get F***ED in every sense of the word. That is what you want right?

Personally, I think you should work on getting your life together. Go get a career, learn how to make normal friends who go out. Own your life for once. But, break out of your shell gradually.

How to have more social success | Free practical advice on social skills, getting along with people, and getting your act together

[songwriter]

Originally Posted by NotesMaeve

As a pretty woman, I could care less about wealth or muscles. What is hot is a guy who takes care of himself and has confidence in his talents.

lol.... I have even possibly "too many" confidence of my talents. And just being here shows I take care of myself. And that has no effect on women... maybe I haven't find someone that thinks like you do.

I don't drink. And I don't want to drink... I don't want to get caught in the trap that "I need some alcohol to do it", I want to keep trying without it.

[Phil Parkinson]

If you were offered a girl with the same life traits as the ones you listed, would you want to have sex with her? (dont answer that)...

You need to work on yourself...

Lose the weight... clean up your appearance... learn to drive... start developing yourself...

Keep putting yourself in social situations...

As you start to move forward with your "projects", you will see the change in how people act towards you.

I can understand why you would want the goal that you do... to achieve it, i would advocate working on yourself.

Phil x

[Christian223]

lol.... I have even possibly "too many" confidence of my talents. And just being here shows I take care of myself. And that has no effect on women... maybe I haven't find someone that thinks like you do.

I remember your post from some time ago Songwriter (sort of).
I personally think that having too much confidence is a negative trait, because its kind of showing the oposite... what NotesMaeve says is the tip of a rather profound thing, i think, taking care of onelsef is not just dressing well or eating well or reading good things, its a more internal thing, an attitude, its actually beign healthy from the inside out, and when this comes naturally its very attractive not just to women. To do this naturally you have to get rid and fix you inner issues, use EFT and TAT because they are fast and effective, also work to be more understanding, try Fast Seduction 101: Art of Pick-up and Seduction there is a guide there, and thats it, good luck.

[Susie]

As far as improving your appearance goes, aside from fitness and weight loss, you could focus on personal grooming. You could make it measurable that you shower every day, always wear fresh clean clothes, shave, a dab of cologne, floss/brush/mouthwash etc. Women are more likely to jump into bed with a guy who's well groomed.

[Truefire]

Originally Posted by Christian223

I remember your post from some time ago Songwriter (sort of).
I personally think that having too much confidence is a negative trait, because its kind of showing the oposite... what NotesMaeve says is the tip of a rather profound thing, i think, taking care of onelsef is not just dressing well or eating well or reading good things, its a more internal thing, an attitude, its actually beign healthy from the inside out, and when this comes naturally its very attractive not just to women. To do this naturally you have to get rid and fix you inner issues, use EFT and TAT because they are fast and effective, also work to be more understanding, try Fast Seduction 101: Art of Pick-up and Seduction there is a guide there, and thats it, good luck.

Note: take stuff on Fastseduction lightly. In my experience, FS is just as likely to mess a guy up than help him. Although I'm for the "community," there's a lot more bad advice and scammers out there than there used to be.

[NotesMaeve]

Originally Posted by songwriter

lol.... I have even possibly "too many" confidence of my talents. And just being here shows I take care of myself. And that has no effect on women... maybe I haven't find someone that thinks like you do.

I don't drink. And I don't want to drink... I don't want to get caught in the trap that "I need some alcohol to do it", I want to keep trying without it.

You're Spanish and you don't drink? An atrocity!

You openly admit you see no point in being with a woman. That's a turn off to women. Most women can sense your level of ambivalence. Word to the wise.

Originally Posted by Phil Parkinson

If you were offered a girl with the same life traits as the ones you listed, would you want to have sex with her?

That was a trifle curt, but agreed 100%.

Originally Posted by Susie

As far as improving your appearance goes, aside from fitness and weight loss, you could focus on personal grooming. You could make it measurable that you shower every day, always wear fresh clean clothes, shave, a dab of cologne, floss/brush/mouthwash etc. Women are more likely to jump into bed with a guy who's well groomed.

Okay. Yes. Everyone should brush their teeth twice a day minimum, and not just to get laid.

[Lauxa]

I think that if your goal is to get laid, you need to put your effort into propositioning as many girls as possible. I saw a post a while back by someone who said he was a PUA and I thought "What is that?" but it stands for Pick-Up Artist. Here's a forum for it:

Pick-up Artist Forum: Videos, Pictures, Thousands of Articles, & FREE Membership!

I am sure there are many other PUA links out there if you do a Google search.

Good luck!

[StarFish]

First, get that job, because even if you're just looking to get laid it's going to take money some way or another. Then if sex is all you want, then I agree with MmeIntentional, just hire a high class prostitute. I'm sure a higher end "lady of the night" will be willing to come over to your place seeing as you have no car. Sorry if that's crude but I want to say it every time I see a guy post here that all he wants right now in life to have sex for the 1st time.

[songwriter]

Originally Posted by Christian223

I remember your post from some time ago Songwriter (sort of).
I personally think that having too much confidence is a negative trait, because its kind of showing the oposite... what NotesMaeve says is the tip of a rather profound thing, i think, taking care of onelsef is not just dressing well or eating well or reading good things, its a more internal thing, an attitude, its actually beign healthy from the inside out, and when this comes naturally its very attractive not just to women. To do this naturally you have to get rid and fix you inner issues, use EFT and TAT because they are fast and effective, also work to be more understanding, try Fast Seduction 101: Art of Pick-up and Seduction there is a guide there, and thats it, good luck.

As for that link... is the same things I've always read.... I'll check "EFT" and "TAT" to see what they are (and I hope they are a think I don't already know lol...).
Too much confidence must be bad... anything has a "too much"...
I know one cure for too much confidence...
Rejection! :-)

That's the way I see it when I get rejected... I feel frustrated but well, it has to be good for me in the long run or so... more humility or so.

[songwriter]

Originally Posted by NotesMaeve

You're Spanish and you don't drink? An atrocity!

You openly admit you see no point in being with a woman. That's a turn off to women. Most women can sense your level of ambivalence. Word to the wise.

lol, no, I don't drink any alcohol, not even a beer. I know they see it, it's plain to see I don't have the motivation that most of the guys have. I don't feel that attraction. I know it's a turn off. Though liking women too much is a turn off too... at least I'm not in that....
To twist some song George Michael sung... "I can't make myself love them/her If I don't..."

[songwriter]

I've seen the video of the EFT website, very interesting, the funny thing is that the relationship of body-mind-soul is the thing I always wonder the most. I study it for myself. Yep, physical problems caused by emotional problems... and physical gestures can alter your emotions, that's true.

But my problem is not an emotion or a feeling... that's it. So I don't have nowhere to place the fingers or the hands... anyway I believe that works but not in the long run, it's just a feeling you get... kind of a trap...
anyway I'll check if "my problem" is identified for them.

TFT very interesting though, but I don't have a trauma, just lack of success...

[Christian223]

Songwritter, the theory of TAT and EFT is not that simple, im afraid you are taking it too lightly because it goes beyond of what you think.

Im no expert, by the way, but those techniques really change your personality for the better, they are not short term solutions, they have life changing effects, they are THAT amazing.

Those techniques work also on Limiting beliefs not just "simple emotions", those beliefs that are limiting you from reaching success. You dont have a trauma, you have many of them, we all have, except if we lived inside of a bubble. You dont reach success because of the way you act, you act negatively because of the negative experiences you had, most of your problems arise from those negative experiences you had because the mind somehow tries to revive them (im no expert, im just trying to explain it as i understand it), so the mind throws this negative memories to you and they act as obstacles, with EFT and TAT you can get this obstacles off from you, you delete them from your personality, not the memories, but the thing that really hurts you are the feelings, so what you are actually doing is freeing yourself emotionally (EFT stand for Emotional Freedom Techniques), what i am trying to say is that the emotions arise from the memories, this emotions are actually OBSTACLES for success, and with this techniques you normalize your organism to function in a healthy way, without any obstacles.

So its not only healing physical problems, but mental ones, attitudes, character problems, its a great tool for self growth, it actually helped me to be more succesfull in various areas in my life, thats why i insist so much, i know for a fact that it can change your life. I dont know what else to say, or how to encourage you more to try it and give it a serious try, just dont miss this great oportunity to change yourself.

My best wishes to you.

Edit:
The link bellow explaint it better, i know its long, but totally worth it
Palace of Possibilities - Using EFT to achieve one's potential

[songwriter]

I know, I know... but the heck of it all... is that I don't know what do I have to change in me. If I knew it I wouldn't need EFT, etc. I can change my personality... not from day to other, lol... but I can do it.

Well, I say that If something depends only on me, I always get it. It make take long but I can get to do it. Okey, but not when that something I want depends on another person too... (like get signed by a record company, or getting a girlfriend).
If I knew what is that that i have to do I would do it. Changing myself, learn some certain skills... singing like Elvis (lol), I know I would do it, all of my life I have get to change what I wanted to change in me. Slowly.

But in this I simply don't know what do I have to change... the problem is depending on other person "validation", especially when they don't tell you why you're not what they want.... or why they do not like. Then I can not change it, for I don't know what it is.

I'm sick of doing online personality test that qualify me as "very attractive personality" or "excelent communication skills".

I enter this web searching for "social skills" or so and this web was the 6th result in Yahoo.

I've learned a lot of things (and maybe even show) but the one that took me here.

[Phil Parkinson]

Originally Posted by Truefire

Note: take stuff on Fastseduction lightly. In my experience, FS is just as likely to mess a guy up than help him. Although I'm for the "community," there's a lot more bad advice and scammers out there than there used to be.

I absolutley agree with Truefire, but i woudl take it a step further...

Stay away from seduction / PU community at all costs... There are one or two morcels of good information drowned in a sea of poison.

I used to be heavily involved in the seduction community - i have seen it do some horrible things to people.

Please don't get involved with that bullshit.

Phil x

[AddictiveX]

Originally Posted by Phil Parkinson

I absolutley agree with Truefire, but i woudl take it a step further...

Stay away from seduction / PU community at all costs... There are one or two morcels of good information drowned in a sea of poison.

I used to be heavily involved in the seduction community - i have seen it do some horrible things to people.

Please don't get involved with that bullshit.

Phil x

I can do nothing but agree with this, The only parts of the Seduction community of any worth are the ones that suggest you be yourself and improve yourself, improving yourself as a whole will lead you to happiness, and happiness will lead you to confidence and the girl you desire.

Mx

[Joe826]

Check out Zan Perrion (Enlightened Seduction by Zan Perrion). Also search for him on YouTube and watch some of the videos. I agree about the "community" having tons of harmful elements, but this guy is really heart-centered and this stuff will make you a better person all around.

[Scorpio]

Check out www.datinggroundwork . com. There are some good articles there specifically for inexperienced guys. Not scammy or anything.