Lucid dreams of deceased high school sweet heart

[peggster]

My high school sweet heart died tragically by being hit by a cat after he tried to cross a freeway. He had become a drug addict before this and believe he had be suffering from hallucinations. This was in 1998. We were together from 1993 to 1997 (I was born in 1976). I recently began having dreams were he is alive and it turns out it was all a lie and he never was killed. Its understood that he made it up as a way to cope over our breakup. I hadn't dreamed of him in over 9 years. In my prior dreams I happen to find him in large crowds by accident and I would begin to chase him. Once I even cought him and I began screaming at him for lying to me about his death. he never reacted or said anything to me. This time I'm actually interacting with him. He is seeking to get back together. These dreams are lucid because I'm aware that I have kids and am married and I'm torn with the decision but I know what I need to do. I've even been able to alter some of the events that occur in the dream. I recently moved back to my home town were we dated and since then the dreams began. In my dreams he looks the same as he did before he passed and I am like I am today.

Before he died he tried to reach out to me and I didn't listen. He told me he had something important to say and when I agreed to meet. He never showed up. I would love to be able to speak with him and lay this to rest. It breaks my heart over again that he is gone.

What. Does this mean? Is it poSsible for me to communicate and how.

[desertrat]

Welcome to the forum. I see two possible meanings to your dreams . The first is just dreams , maby from some guilt of not helping him while he was alive. The secount , we all all go out of body , astral project , during certin parts of sleep and remember it only as a dream. I met a dead girl friend that way many years ago . desert rat

[Mynder]

It could mean that you aren't really over the loss yet, and that you linger on what he might have wanted to say to you.

It could mean that now is a time when you are ready to confront your feelings once again, and work through them once more, as much as your capacity for the pain allows you to do.

What I see in here is some strong desire for closure that you have not allowed yourself to feel, perhaps because of guilt (you didn't listen, and so never found out what he wanted to say).

Do you know you are not confined to your nightly dreams in this? Find a quiet place for yourself, outside of home. Possibly a place that had meaning for the two of you. Close your eyes and imagine him being there beside you, as he was, with you being as you are now, and allow yourself to say to him all you feel the need to say, and ask him all you feel the need to ask.

If you feel it helps, write him a letter, explaining your feelings, and burn that when you're done.