Empath Question

[Ashley88]

First of all I have to say that I am not a professional at the psychic and paranormal. I cant even put my finger on meditating for some reason. Which is why I usually lurk. I do not know the answer to many of these questions. Anyway that is besides the point. I feel other peoples energy a little to well I think. I am not sure though. I can usually feel what other people are feeling in turn I usually start feeling that way. Now one thing I have to make clear it is all the time, and everyone I come across. I never really questioned it befor or have talked to anyone about it. However, I think it is starting to take a toll on me. Once I am home I feel so worked up and tense. I am edgy and in a bad mood. The only reason I think that relates to my "ability" if you want to call it that, is because when I am home all day, I am in the best mood. I feel fine. I do not have a stressful job and my life is pretty good. But i swear, when I am around people I can pick up there vibes and it is just so weird. Now I also have to say that I moved a lot as child, and changed schools quite a bit. This could be just as simple as me being able to read people good because I have met so many different kinds. I am not sure. I just wanted some opinions on it.

[Summerbreeze]

I'm an empath too, i always thought that it would be quite normal what i feel. I've the same problems. If you want we can go trough a trial together in preventing the empathy and see how it affects the energy level.

Three Quick Ways to Get Control of Overactive Empathy


How to Turn off Overactive Empathy


Is Overactive Empathy Ruining Your Life?


~sb

[Nimue]

A quick tip is imaginining a shield surrounding you to protect against other feelings. That way you block by intention your over-sensitiveness. It's a way of "grounding". You'll find more details in these links

[MasterRishi]

Empathy can be a scary experience before you understand how to use it in a way that doesn't affect you personally so much. Empathy is also a wonderful thing because it can be an amazing tool for helping those around you. It's also the first step towards opening up your own telepathic ability, so if you've ever wanted to become more actively telepathic, you would do well to harness and use your empathic abilities.

I always use a method that I created for myself when it comes to feeling, hearing or knowing something about anyone else. Lets call it imaginative dissociation. I made that up just now, but it sounds really good . I basically create an image of the people around me in my head, an avatar if you will. I use that avatar to display any sort of emotional issues or strong feelings the person might be experiencing. I found long ago that trying to feel someone else's energy to understand it can be exhausting and sometimes frightening. It's especially bad when you're just wide open and feeling everything all at once.

Don't shy away from your empathy, just train it. Our psychic abilities are just like anything else that we can use as a tool. Think about your hands. You had to train them to hold objects, then further training was required to use a pencil with accuracy, so on and so on. The same is true of your psychic abilities. The only difference is there's no physical object for you to wrestle with and no school teacher to show you the right way to use it (although wouldn't that be excellent, a school for psychics).

I have come to understand that this is part of my job, my reason for being on the earth at this time. Most of these things come naturally to me and I'm realizing that I'm being called to teach others how to handle and use their abilities so that they can be the most useful healers and light workers possible. Imagine what your handwriting would look like if you never practiced your alphabet or writing sentences. Now imagine your psychic abilities like that rogue hand, just writing whatever it feels with no direction or idea of what it's doing. There are all kinds of clever ways you can train yourself to sharpen your abilities. If you have any questions, just feel free to ask me. I'm always happy to help.

[Nimue]

I second that. The biggest step was to realize you're an empath and decide to look it up, it'll be easier from now on. I had gotten to the point of agoraphobia before finding out: with a short time here and simple imagination techniques as grounding/shielding/cleansing I fixed my social life in a quite short time. Now I don't even need to think of it, I bet you'll do the same

[evelynlim]

Originally Posted by Nimue

I had gotten to the point of agoraphobia before finding out: with a short time here and simple imagination techniques as grounding/shielding/cleansing.

As an empath, it is essential that you protect yourself with energy shields. It really works! I used to find my energy sapped too until I realized that I needed to protect myself before stepping into anywhere crowded.

[elucidate]

So once you've pictured a shield around you, is it still there even when you aren't thinking about it? This is what I have the hardest thing with. I have trouble having faith that it's still there when I'm not thinking about it.

[MasterRishi]

Protection is only required if you believe there's some danger out there that you need protection from. Empathy isn't something that you need to feel afraid of or that you need protection because of, it's just a good idea to fine tune it as a tool so it can become more useful instead of burdensome.

The protective barrier, if you do create one, doesn't require constant attention to maintain it. It becomes a part of you, like your heart. You dont have to think of your heart in order for it to beat, it just goes right on doing it's job. Once you have put your intention towards creating a barrier between yourself and the overstimulation of feelings, it will stay right there until you ask it to go away. It carries on doing the last thing you told it to. I couldn't imagine the distraction this would become if you had to constantly think "white light shield" throughout your day in order to keep yourself from being bombarded.

In the end though, hopefully you'll realize that all these other people are really just aspects of yourself and that their thoughts are also your thoughts and there's really nothing to shield or protect yourself from in the first place. If you understand there's no separation energetically from the people around you, then there's not really anything coming from someone else. It's all you and it's all good. There's also no fear of losing energy to someone else because your source of energy is infinite and can never run out. Just these few concepts, once realized, will help you learn to better embrace your gifts to their fullest potential.

[rei]

As for shielding, that is one tool that can help. luci, a shield is there whether you think about it or not if you set the intention for it to be (and believe that is all you really need). You can also create one at the same time each day and over time it will become stronger and more automatic.

And for some, it also helps to focus less on keeping the emotional energy of the other out and more on keeping yourself in. Sometimes empathy isn't from what they are sending at you and it's more from you sending your energy to them. It's just not always easy to realize that's happening. Especially when so many empaths would hardly want to be intrusive, heh.

Rigorous physical exercise, the exercises mentioned on Psychic But Sane above, intentional "selfishness" are a few ways to train yourself to keep yourself in your own auric field.

And then you can learn the experience of empathy from that firmer foundation. Often a bit easier to handle.

And OP, your experience may also be a side effect of all the stimulation of being out and about and around a lot of people. Some of us handle that different from others. Sometimes the lights, sights, sounds, colors, and underlying desire to be super-watchful of our surroundings can leave us so frazzled!

[HiImJeremy]

People often think that when we use energetic shields that is is because we think we need protection from scary demons or spirits.

For some this is true

For me it is not the case and for many who use a shield, it is not uses as a fear mechanism. In actual fact we were given both a sword and shield by Creator when we came to Earth. Creator knew there would be danger. But creator didn't create these. We create negative beings, with anger and grief, often times a willingness to hurt others. This creates an energy or an entity in some peoples eyes. There are trillions upon trillions of energies zip zagging around everywhere and we created them all! Not use, but all that have ever lived. That's a lot of energy right? Those who are sensitive like many of us on this forum are especially susceptible to these energies. There are good and bad, dont get me wrong, but i see nothing fear related by wanting to not be subjected to a bombardment of horrible feelings and anger and grief of others.

Empathy is a gift. You understand people with Empathy. You are told you don't understand, but you do understand! you feel their pain and deep down they form a relationship with you that supercedes any other shallow connection. It's very special, but you need to take care of it, you needn't carry any other persons stuff with you all the time. There is a time and place when this can happen, but help yourself and you help others.

Shielding is very powerful. In my experience it is important for ME to keep a constant awareness on my sheild given to me by creator. It took practice, but it becomes automatic almost. It feels like a heavy wollen cloak almost, yet it weighs nothing. When i feel this my shield is on, when i don't it is off. Surely you can tell the difference between a heavy wollen cloak and one that is not. My shield is as bright as my connection to Creator is and around my shiled is a filter of Kevlar which allows in only those good energies of happiness and love and light. All other energies that are not for your highest good and are negative are not to enter through this filter and bounce off. By imagining, you are setting intention and by setting intention you make it so. We are all warriors who take responsibility for ourselves and our safety. Some use guides and angels which is ok, but that is not taking responsibility for yourself. This is passing it over to others. When we were children this was alright we couldn't hold our own shield. But now we are all adults. Heck im only 17, what do i know?

Nothing really. you make you own choices. trust your gut.

Just rememer the most powerful ArchAngel Michael carries with him both a sword and a shield at all times. He teaches us to take responsibility for our own shield. He will also come to you when you need help and really any other time you ask for him! hahaha

This is only my opinion, and what has been taught to me by my Shaman Teacher. Take what feels right and leave the rest. I hope I have at least shown you a different perspective on protection as it is related to your empathy.

Good luck!

[Nimue]

Originally Posted by elucidate

So once you've pictured a shield around you, is it still there even when you aren't thinking about it? This is what I have the hardest thing with. I have trouble having faith that it's still there when I'm not thinking about it.

Yes, in a way. I never really needed to think about having faith on it. At the beginning I needed to strongly imagine it all the time, sometimes even when I were at home. Finally I cleaned and re-gathered my inner self, keeping it together by developing a healthy level of selfishness. As people around me are generally calm, usually that healthy level of selfishness does the trick, but I can also create a shield and keep it at the back of my brain-it's enough for it to work, you don't need it at the front line of consciousness (except maybe in more difficult situations, where you really need to actively fight against the incoming feelings). For extra sensitivity I just loosen both protections

I believe that the main trick is to realize when you actually need the shield-you may be blocking yourself too much when not needed, becoming a little "cold", or getting really tired and full of negative feelings before realizing you need the shield. That's what I'm working on now, and I can tell I never felt so "normal" before in my whole life.

[MasterRishi]

Originally Posted by HiImJeremy

Some use guides and angels which is ok, but that is not taking responsibility for yourself. This is passing it over to others. When we were children this was alright we couldn't hold our own shield. But now we are all adults. Heck im only 17, what do i know?

The strange truth of this is that there is nothing outside of ourselves, so really we're only passing responsibility from ourself to our other self. Where do you think those guides and those angels came from? They came from the same creator source we did, the all that is. And all that is is really one thing expressing itself infinitely, so we are the angels and the guides, and the angels and guides are us. We experience a separation only to have a multitude of experience. It is not irresponsibility that calls us to ask for assistance from our higher self, but wisdom. Our higher self knows more about what is in our highest good than we do, and so it seems to only make sense to allow our higher self to guide us in this way.

Michael's sword and shield are energetic constructs of defense and offense. These two physical objects are the closest thing our minds can use to relate what we see to what we know. Whenever I hold palaver with Michael, his hands are free and open to embrace me. The archangels do have offensive "weapons", but I have only ever seen them when they are in use.

[elucidate]

Originally Posted by MasterRishi

Protection is only required if you believe there's some danger out there that you need protection from. Empathy isn't something that you need to feel afraid of or that you need protection because of, it's just a good idea to fine tune it as a tool so it can become more useful instead of burdensome.

Yes, I feel the same way, and I feel like if I'm wanting protection from something then there is some fear there, which might need to be released. I don't feel afraid of empathy, but I sometimes find it confusing to know which is my emotion and what belongs to someone else. In this way I think shielding might help? I generally prefer to hold the frequency of love and find that to be the best overall protection against fear of any kind.

The protective barrier, if you do create one, doesn't require constant attention to maintain it. It becomes a part of you, like your heart. You dont have to think of your heart in order for it to beat, it just goes right on doing it's job. Once you have put your intention towards creating a barrier between yourself and the overstimulation of feelings, it will stay right there until you ask it to go away. It carries on doing the last thing you told it to. I couldn't imagine the distraction this would become if you had to constantly think "white light shield" throughout your day in order to keep yourself from being bombarded.

Thanks. That's what I remind myself of, but sometimes it just feels like "am I just deluding myself here" Is it really there?"

In the end though, hopefully you'll realize that all these other people are really just aspects of yourself and that their thoughts are also your thoughts and there's really nothing to shield or protect yourself from in the first place. If you understand there's no separation energetically from the people around you, then there's not really anything coming from someone else. It's all you and it's all good. There's also no fear of losing energy to someone else because your source of energy is infinite and can never run out. Just these few concepts, once realized, will help you learn to better embrace your gifts to their fullest potential.

Yes, thanks. I think I realized that a while ago...though sometimes I do forget! I know we are all walking around in our own energy fields, if that's what you mean, and those fields mingle whether we like it or not.

[elucidate]

Originally Posted by rei

As for shielding, that is one tool that can help. luci, a shield is there whether you think about it or not if you set the intention for it to be (and believe that is all you really need). You can also create one at the same time each day and over time it will become stronger and more automatic.

Thanks for the reassurance. I did start a habit of visualizing it during meditation for a while there, and then I started letting it slip. For me, remembering that I can intend for one when I do need it around tricky people seems to be the hardest part for me. Maybe I need to wear a rubber band on my finger or something else to remind me?

And for some, it also helps to focus less on keeping the emotional energy of the other out and more on keeping yourself in. Sometimes empathy isn't from what they are sending at you and it's more from you sending your energy to them. It's just not always easy to realize that's happening. Especially when so many empaths would hardly want to be intrusive, heh.

I think that's an important distinction, and it's where I choose to place my focus in these matters. Just being able to keep myself in and know what is my stuff and what is their stuff. I'm mainly ok with being able to differentiate, but sometimes I do get confused, I admit.

Rigorous physical exercise, the exercises mentioned on Psychic But Sane above, intentional "selfishness" are a few ways to train yourself to keep yourself in your own auric field.

I have been getting the urge to do another martial art, and found that to be an awesome way to increase energy and stay fit and grounded. Riding my bike usually helps and I just moved house, so that was a workout in itself. I'm not a big lover of exercise though, but I'm getting better at disciplining myself to 'just do it', because I love the way I feel afterwards. My body is tone and fit for my age (never thought I'd be saying that line)

And then you can learn the experience of empathy from that firmer foundation. Often a bit easier to handle.

Thanks again Rei. I can always count on practical advice when it comes from you.

[Nimue]

Rei is awesome I won't forget how she helped me back then when I first came here for my empathy.

Originally Posted by elucidate

Yes, I feel the same way, and I feel like if I'm wanting protection from something then there is some fear there, which might need to be released. I don't feel afraid of empathy, but I sometimes find it confusing to know which is my emotion and what belongs to someone else. In this way I think shielding might help?

It will It'll take some persistence, but it works.
It was still messy ar first, but day-by-day it helped me to find out who I am. Most fear went away after that, too. Solved a problem of years in, I think, less than a month.
God bless the one who discovered shielding!!!

[elucidate]

Originally Posted by Nimue

I believe that the main trick is to realize when you actually need the shield-you may be blocking yourself too much when not needed, becoming a little "cold", or getting really tired and full of negative feelings before realizing you need the shield. That's what I'm working on now, and I can tell I never felt so "normal" before in my whole life.

Yes, this seems to be the crux of the issue for me. I seem to remember to put the shield up after I've accumulated all this neg stuff that belongs to others. I just seem to be surrounded by people complaining about their lives to me or around me all the time these days.

I make a concerted effort to not complain about my stuff, and so it become extra noticeable when others are doing it, and I feel like I get bogged down in it. With friends I can say "can you just cut it with the complaints...I'm over hearing about it" but with my supervisor at work it is harder to say something like that to her, and I just wouldn't. I focus on just allowing her complaints to rise up into the ether...but it's still draining at times to be forced to listen to it.

Thanks Nimue.

[elucidate]

Originally Posted by Nimue

It will It'll take some persistence, but it works.
It was still messy ar first, but day-by-day it helped me to find out who I am.

I do pay particular attention to keeping my auric field clean, with rinses and smudging and crystals, so I feel like I have that covered...but for knowing what is my stuff is, and what is someone elses, I feel like I need something extra to help with that, so I will persist with the shielding and see what happens...

[Nimue]

Just wondering, how long have you been practicing on shielding?

I have a suggestion. Don't know if it'll help, but it's my personal theory of getting it right.
The method is called "think on it".
(1)Forget the crystals and the trinkets. Put your all into developing the right intentions about the matter, and getting the flaws out of them, getting them strong, put some philosophy into it if needed too. Put your mind and soul into it. I'm generally a supporter of the simple methods, and find that the objects often serve merely as psychological support. Which means you have everything needed to do it just by yourself. Have some faith in yourself, it's a good first step
(2) Find yourself. Concentrating directly on yourself instead of other things, and doing it all the time, helps you get the right focus. You may feel a little guilty for getting so self-centered (at least I did, a lot), but you can always return in your calming altruistic aura later, when you'll be strong enough to defend yourself. As your constant shield grows stronger, start questioning the feelings you get. "Does this look like how I would react?" If you don't know, you may need to do some inner searching too, and question your own self. It is possible that outer energies have "contaminated" the perception you have about your own personality, so get your broom and start cleaning. This will become easier as the shield-and you-become stronger.

Don't worry about your boss, advanced shielding can get you into the "don't hear, don't care, don't get affected" state that so many "normal" people find easy to go in

Oh, and if you do want some material support, get water to drink (not too much, but enough). Let yourself be well-hydrated, it helps the balance

[Ashley88]

I am sorry it took me so long to get back on here. I have satelite internet so it only works sometimes. I appreciate so much effort being put into this thread. Everything really helped me a lot. Thank you summer breeze, I will definatley check out these links just as soon as I get a chance. I appreciate it. You too Nimue. MasterRishi, how can this help people? Just curious. I am going to school to be a substance abuse counselor or a school counselor . So you think that this would be helpful in that profession? I completely agree with you about having to train it as you would your hand. Makes sense. I also was going to say that I do not feel the need to “protect myself” exactly, I just want to make it go away sometimes. Like I do not want to know how anyone truly feels. The worse is that I know the exact second that someone doesn’t like me, or is questioning me, etc. I could go without knowing those things. And evelynlim, I am so glad you understand the way it drains me. Some days I just want to sit on the couch and stare at the wall (just some days every once in a while Its not common for it to be that bad but it can be. And rei, everything you said made a lot of sense as well. Jeremy, I do not consider this a fear at all by any means. It has always kind of been there and I am just now noticing that it is not normal. Which is fine, I just want to choose when I can feel those things and when I cant. And I also want to say that I do know when it is my feelings and someone else. I am extremely aware of that. I know if its me or someone else, because I know what kind of day I have had, and I know the things that have happened that day. If I am feeling something that hasn’t related to that day then most likely that is not me. That I cannot explain. Its like second nature, as far as me knowing if its me or someone else. So elucidate, if you start feeling a certain way, think about your day, am I suppose to be feeling this way? Was I feeling this way a minute ago? Look at the people around you, by there facial expressions alone you could probably target where your feelings are coming from. My biggest problem is that my feelings linger. If I am around people that arent in that great of a mood, that feeling doesn’t instantly go away. It almost feels like that emotion has been picked up and tucked away, and that emotion kind of follows me around all day. Not over powering other emotions, but just lingering. By the end of the day there are so many emotions lingering that you really just arent feeling like yourself…. Nimue, I like your concept of no trinkets, and keeping it “natural.” I do appreciate all of this, and I intend to use every bit of it. I see there are a lot of senior members that replied, so while I have everyone on here, i was just wondering if anyone could give me some good pointers are meditating. I have thought for a while that regularly meditating will help me sort some of those feelings out daily (not to mention I am a worrier, my brain doesnt care to stop. Plus, I am working on being more positive, I think meditating could assist me with these things and more. So any advice would be great! Thanks again!

[elucidate]

I've been doing shielding visualizations for a couple of years, but as I said I forget to do it a lot, until after I've noticed that I need it.

I do need to have more faith in myself, you're right about that. I don't really leave it all up to crystals, though I do like to carry some most days, and have had some amazing learning experiences with crystal, but I realize that the power is in me as well, and that's where I need to focus.

I think I know what you mean by taking a self centred attitude, and I have been consciously doing this for a while now, so I don't really get the guilts about it anymore.

As for my boss, I do my best to just let her verbal diarrohea pass me by, and mostly this works, but she just never shuts up and literally everything that comes out of her mouth is a complaint of some sort. But I hear you there.

The water drinking is a good tip too...and I do my best to keep on top of this one. It's a fact that most of the western world is dehydrated from not drinking enough water, so it's something most of us need to improve on.

Thanks for your input here Nimue. Much appreciated.

Originally Posted by Nimue

Just wondering, how long have you been practicing on shielding?

I have a suggestion. Don't know if it'll help, but it's my personal theory of getting it right.
The method is called "think on it".
(1)Forget the crystals and the trinkets. Put your all into developing the right intentions about the matter, and getting the flaws out of them, getting them strong, put some philosophy into it if needed too. Put your mind and soul into it. I'm generally a supporter of the simple methods, and find that the objects often serve merely as psychological support. Which means you have everything needed to do it just by yourself. Have some faith in yourself, it's a good first step
(2) Find yourself. Concentrating directly on yourself instead of other things, and doing it all the time, helps you get the right focus. You may feel a little guilty for getting so self-centered (at least I did, a lot), but you can always return in your calming altruistic aura later, when you'll be strong enough to defend yourself. As your constant shield grows stronger, start questioning the feelings you get. "Does this look like how I would react?" If you don't know, you may need to do some inner searching too, and question your own self. It is possible that outer energies have "contaminated" the perception you have about your own personality, so get your broom and start cleaning. This will become easier as the shield-and you-become stronger.

Don't worry about your boss, advanced shielding can get you into the "don't hear, don't care, don't get affected" state that so many "normal" people find easy to go in

Oh, and if you do want some material support, get water to drink (not too much, but enough). Let yourself be well-hydrated, it helps the balance

[Lovable]

Can someone please clarify for me?

So, an empath that hasn't quite got the grasp or understanding over their ability and doesn't know how to handle it as yet can find themself attracting the sorts of people who are unintentionally after your good or nurturing energies/just drawn to you? Is that what can happen?

I am pretty positive this is the best way to describe how I feel I am. I have people drawn to me who open up immediately about their problems and it feels like there is an unspoken expectation that I can 'heal' them as such. I recently had a guy I'd been dating tell me he didn't know why, but felt he "can just say anything to me" that he doesn't "usually open up like this". It was very 'full on' and once he got done I guess he felt embarassed for opening up to a new person, he stopped seeing me because he felt I was too deep? I know I seem to have this effect on people often. I know this is more than being a 'good listener' because I am sensing all this before we have the exchange about it. It is getting to a point of frustration for me because I am realizing I am attracting men that are still 'little boys', in need of a nurturer and guider, or a mother. I feel ripped off and I find myself yearning for a man who will not feed off this. I don't want to stop being the way I am with people. I am loving and intuitive and I want still be warm, open and friendly with others but I don't want to attract men who fall apart and emotionally lean on ME 100%. Because once they have their strength back, they feel embarassed for their outburst and blame it on my openness... I don't mind the emotional exchange in a loving relationship (which is completely different) but I don't want to be the pillar, in itself. I'd like it to be a support both ways. I hope this makes sense?

It's not just with men in my life, I get this with work colleagues, friends and sometimes strangers. I recently found myself overwhelmed with a family situation I was picking up on and I could not handle it well. I haven't managed to switch it off. Whatever it is. I feel exhausted and it causes me to pull away a lot, I'm at the point where I prefer being on my own and when I have to go to work or out and about I have to psych myself up to not feel people's feelings or energy. It's draining me on top of the standard work I need to complete at work in the first place. I suppose those that didn't have any knowledge of what this is would assume I ams selfish and don't want to listen to people's problems.

It is something I've aways been aware of but never comepletely admitted. I suppose I am admitting it now. I want to be able to feel less like people's source of validation or strength without my consent.

Is it really as simple as imagining a wall or a boundary around myself?

[Nimue]

Ashley, I can relate-I'd often come back from exams and just sit down staring on the wall.
It's helpful for yourself, first of all, because you can understand better people around you and make better choices on your company. You can help your friends better, too-the people closer to me often ask me about my insticts about someone, so when their expectations are wrong I can warn them. It can help in psychology/councelling, as you have a good instict in "reading" people-you have to get good enough with shielding, though, the negative energies involved in such professions can really wear you down!
Very nice description of your ways to distinguish your own feelings!!

Lovable-Well, everyone needs a hug, sometime And it looks like you are a bit too good in providing it. Also, you probably subconsciously emit an "I am a hugger that listens to your problems" sign, or something like this.
Guys hate feeling vulnerable, and also the "less open" people are weirded out by the fact they're acting diffrent than usual, more open.

My advice-if you are an empath, meaning you can "feel" what kind of person everyone is, use it to choose the people you relate at. If someone feels like yet another little boy, don't lose your time. I used it to choose my bf: for years I've been turning almost everyone down, the best cases ended at the third date. And then I meet that guy in a bar. He didn't look like my type from matters of appearence (although cute), but we got together at once and, judging by the 3 months I know him, his character is exactly all I've ever wanted so far. (Also, he's like a clamshell when it comes to problems-he doesn't want to bother me with sad things) could happen to you Love can come in unexpected time and place-I know of a married couple who first met simply by happening to walk at the same side of the street!
If you have a functional 3rd eye, I'd say you should trust it as much as the normal one in these matters