What Was This? Dream? or a Visit?

[gonemadx3]

I guess I never really realized what lucid dreaming was, but I have had these all my life. Some I could go into and control the outcome and some I could not.
One in particular that I will never, ever forget was the dream I had about my ex, Chad (we have a daughter together) who passed away about 7 yrs ago. He died from a gun shot wound to the head which was classified suicide but speculation surrounded the situation that it may have been murder- by his own father, who is now deceased as well.
Well, getting started, this is how the dream came about.
After his death I was very shaken and worried that he may not get where he needed to go in the afterlife and that he wandered around aimlessly wishing he had not done what he had done to himself and all of his family. He was a troubled soul in life. I often wondered if he tried to contact us or wanted to & I desperately wanted to talk to him again as our last conversation was a day before his death and I felt like he was trying to tell me something but wouldn’t or was scared to.

In the dream, I am at this old white farm house with my mom & his mom standing in the living room looking out of this huge picture window. I was the only one looking outside and I seen this “white” mini van slowly driving by. He was driving the van and was wearing a do-rag on his head but there were several other shadows riding with him in the van. Those I could not make out, but there were people with him. He drove by very slowly turned and looked at me and smiled. I immediately turned around to my mom and his mom and was crying and hysterical saying, “I just seen Chad! OMG! He just drove by our house”! I ran outside into this yard with a long pathway which had a little “white” fence along both sides of it. I was looking for his wife, (we all got along pretty well and were friends) I was screaming her name and found her in this old “white” barn that had a glass roof like a greenhouse would have. I was still sobbing and yelling to her, “OMG Chad just drove by our house”! She just looked at me like I was crazy. Matt Damon was there too, I am not sure what role he played in the dream but I remember him looking at me out in the barn. Chad’s wife just stood there and held my hands while I tried to convince her it was him. I ran back into the house still crying and explaining to my mom and his mom (who was now crying) what I had seen. But looking again, he was gone. The atmosphere in the dream was very foggy. In the house was clear, but when I ran outside the air was very foggy around us. Misty like. The presence of “white” was everywhere. Maybe as the representation of “peace”? I dunno. It was the first dream I ever had of him after his death, but not the last.
Almost seemed as a confirmation for me assuring me he was ok and with others who loved him.

Any ideas?

[MiBeloved]

He is okay in the sense that his spirit still exist in the astral world and he has found people on that side of existence whom he could relate to.
You have to go on with your life here and you can't correct what he did nor make up for it.
No use in looking back. He has to go on as he is and you should make the best of your opportunity on this side of existence.