Motivation

[wjw]

Hi everyone,

I've been a lurker, not a poster; this is the first thread I've started.

I'm finding in my work at the moment (software-related) that no matter what system I follow to prioritize my tasks, no matter how carefully I break down to-do lists into smaller and smaller items, when it comes down to it I still prefer to read blogs and play online games.

I know there's something compulsive about this behaviour but I find it very hard to stop.

I also know the textbook ways of getting round this but none of them seem to work. Every mini-task I undertake, particularly if it involves talking to someone else, holds out the terrifying possibility that I'll have to do yet another thing. There seems to be no end. I don't feel like ticking tasks off will actually reduce the pressure on me; there are so many tasks and no way to be sure I'm doing any of them right, and each one done less than perfectly just creates more and more. And if I actually finish them I have to work out what to do next, which is even more terrifying.

This difficulty in motivating myself to do small tasks also affects the macro-level solutions. I find it hard to write down goals because, given how difficult I find it to do ten minutes work, I don't see how I can have any faith that I'll ever achieve those goals. Everything that I might use to inspire myself I also find a way to undermine.

I get exercise, and I do a lot of the right things. But I still read blogs for an hour in the morning when I should be clearing the decks and getting to work. How can I change this?

As I write this the Google ad is for "leadership skills". How does anyone get the confidence to want to be a leader? It's alien to me.

[CoolStuff]

I'm similar, with a few differences. Lemme tell you my story, hopefully it helps.

I do forums and video games too. Videos games I just went cold turkey, but now I play every night again (only for about an hour at most). Forums I have gone without, but now there are just so many I keep up with haha. I always fluctuate. Sometimes I'm following a lot, sometimes I'm not.

I WANT to be a leader, and I'm getting better. I agree it's challenging, but at least try. Nothing comes easy.

I actually feel mini tasks reduce my workload. But my problem is that I would always do the small little things to feel like I accomplished something, when really it was nothing. You must finish the things you are least looking forward to first. Try this also: (I noticed I would do this subconciously sometimes) Visualize where you are now. Then visualize the final product, what you want. Now visualize the transformation between the two steps, and consider it insignificant. I've noticed this is pretty good, and sometimes I was doing it without noticing it. I always dread setting things up, especially eletronics, but I love using them and the creative things I do once I'm setup. (that's why I love a studio haha). So now I just think about what I'm gonna be doing when it's set up.

If you have difficulty writing down goals, are you saying you don't know what you want? I could easily write down so many goals. Writing down goals does help.

[tylerlloyd]

wjw, I personally think the "textbook" methods of time management and goal creation are overall a waste of time. You know yourself the best and the things you like and need to do in a day. Figure out a flow that works best for you.

Forums and online games are not exactly bad - I think that some people who will tell you that in the self-help department get a little overzealous in their quest to be "happy." I'm not going try and tell you to be balanced either because I think overall that's a widely abused and ambiguous term that doesn't really clarify anything. Rather, consider this idea: If there's nothing in particular that you want to achieve - who is to tell you that you should? It's your life, it's up to you.

I know this goes against the grain of what is popular in the self-help industry, but I think "getting yourself motivated" and doing other little "techniques" that other people came up with is mostly a waste of time. Try some out to get some ideas to play with, but work with what you figure out works for you.

[Mr_A]

First things First

Your a Junky but your preferred drug is video games and forums.

There are only 3 ways you can get motivated
-Desperation
-Inspiration
-Raw logic

Desperation can be in the form of a deadline, so if you dont meet the dead line you loose your job or if you wanna be dramatic your right hand.

Inspiration can be in the form of your serving something greater than yourself or bettering yourself, so you go to your job knowing that you’re helping others in some greater sense or you’re improving your self.

Raw logic.
You know your problem.
You know your outcome.
You know why you want your outcome.
You find the fastest and most effective way to achieve your outcome (Even if that includes destroying a major city).
You eliminate the things stopping you from achieving your outcome.
You achieve your outcome.
In this instance you will need to uninstall all your games and banned yourself from the net, call IT they will gladly assist.

[tylerlloyd]

It sounds that your idea of raw logic is really based on the other two you mentioned... unless there was some sort desperation or inspiration - would you even be able to perceive the problem?

[Mr_A]

Originally Posted by tylerlloyd

It sounds that your idea of raw logic is really based on the other two you mentioned... unless there was some sort desperation or inspiration - would you even be able to perceive the problem?

Inspiration and desperation are intense emotions. Raw logic is almost like problem solving and has little or no emotional attachment, like cleaning the unit or shopping for food. I don’t need to get myself inspired or put myself in a state of desperation to shop for food, i just make that decision cause i could be running low on food. I could always wait until i have no food and get hungry and use desperation as a motivator.

Steve writes about this in the articles below.
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...hest-pounding/
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...lf-discipline/

[Ilya]

Hi, wjw.

Welcome to the ranks of posters.
Your procrastination pains are familiar to me. I've spent years in this state and I know how frustrating can it be. As far as I understand, your problem only manifests in your work environment, doesn't it. If this is the case, I'm afraid you are in a wrong field of work for you. Can it be the problem? Think about it. Do you like what you are doing. Was it something that you've always wanted to do?
If the answer is no, and you've chosen this work for money, or out of fashion, or because someone told you to, then what you are experiencing may be the sign of impending burnout. You body might be telling you that it wants to get out. Judging by the lack of hope in your words, getting out may not be a bad idea.
I might be wrong though. And it is just a time management problem.
In this case I want to comment on the few of your words, that caught my attention

I also know the textbook ways of getting round this but none of them seem to work.

That's a bold statement, but I'll assume that you've really looked through the most of the time management systems, tried them for a considerable amount of time and they didn't work. I also assume that you've tried GTD and it didn't reduce your stress.

Every mini-task I undertake, particularly if it involves talking to someone else, holds out the terrifying possibility that I'll have to do yet another thing. There seems to be no end.

No. Completing tasks does not hold the possibility that you'll have to do yet another thing. Completing tasks holds the absolute certainty that you'll have to do another thing. And then another and then another.
There is one task that reportedly is an exception to this rule. In my task list it is called "To die." Still, some people believe that even this task is not the final one. Besides, I'm very keen on procrastinating on that one.

What I'm trying to say here, is that the purpose of doing anything is not to end what you are doing. Reading news, and playing games also constantly provide you with more and more stuff for you to do. But that doesn't seem to terrify you. The thing that we all try to stop from happening as soon as possible is pain. Pain in the broad sense of anything uncomfortable. And if your tasks cause you pain - see my first paragraph above and get out of this job.

Our life in general and our job in particular are the endless chains of tasks. You can't stop it. You can't complete life early and rest for the rest of it. You can't finish your job either. If you don't have anything to do, you get fired.

I don't feel like ticking tasks off will actually reduce the pressure on me;

You feel, or you've tried it and it really didn't reduce the pressure on you?
In any case it's not necessary ticking them off, it's writing them down that can reduce the pressure.

there are so many tasks and no way to be sure I'm doing any of them right, and each one done less than perfectly just creates more and more.

How many tasks are there? My current task list is close to a thousand items. And I don't feel any pressure, because I don't have to do them all simultaneously. I'll be doing them for several years and I'm sure by the end of this list I will have as much tasks in front of me. And mind you, these ones are personal. My work task are just a tiny part of that list. I've worked in software development and I would be surprised if you have more than several hundreds of tasks in front of you at any given moment. Usually, it is much less.

And if I actually finish them I have to work out what to do next, which is even more terrifying.

What scares you? What is your fear? I think answering this question will be the key to solving your problem.

I get exercise, and I do a lot of the right things. But I still read blogs for an hour in the morning when I should be clearing the decks and getting to work. How can I change this?

I'm not sure that reading some well chosen blogs for an hour is a bad thing. Some areas of life are so dynamic, that you have to know what's going on, to stay competitive.
But if you feel that what you read is the waste of time but can't stop you can try one of these things.
Read your blogs through a reader that allows storing the feeds in an archive forever. I use Google reader for that.
This way you'll know, that even if you miss some entry you can always go back and read it.
Then take a break. Say, for weekend, or even for a week. Then look at what happened through the reader, preferably in title-only mode. Try to guess what the entry is about. Read only the ones that feel worthwhile.
Then on a second pass, read the rest. Think about how much useful information you've gained during the second pass. It might be much less then
you would have expected. This way, step by step, you'll notice that there aren't many news to track. For one event there will be dozens of blog entries covering this event from every angle. Do you need every angle? Or may be the original news source will be enough?

Also approach this habit from a daily routine point of view. It seems to me, that you've just conditioned yourself to read blogs for a certain amount of time at a certain time of day.
You may try a substitution trick. Find a useful activity of about the same length and schedule it for the same time. Say, schedule a meeting. Not very useful, but it doesn't matter. Do it instead of reading and then go on with whatever you do after you usually read the blogs. After some time, you'll notice that your routine has changed. It may not be more productive, but you'll know that you are in the driver's seat and can condition yourself to something else.

[John Hill]

If you are not motivated and have difficultly getting started on what you would like to be doing consider this does your life need a kickstart? Maybe you need to change your environment or your habits to get you moving towards where you want to be.

John

Attracting People.com