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| Personal Effectiveness Goals, productivity, time management, motivation, self-discipline, overcoming procrastination, habits, organizing, problem-solving, decision-making, intelligence |
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| | #1 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 225
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I would really appreciate hearing how you make decisions and/or reach conclusions. I make them by just slowly absorbing a whole bunch of (sometimes seemingly random) information and then one day just getting a "feeling" and going with feeling. For the most part this method of decision making has served me very well both personally and professionally but when it hasn't been successful the results have been painful. I find the two areas that are the most troublesome for me are (1) in relationships where I've developed a high level of trust and (2) thinking about an idea all the way to conclusion. The second area actually bothers me the most. I can usually work my way backwards from "feeling/decision" to identify what lead to this conclusion but it can take a long time. I would really like to be more aware of the entire process. It makes me nervous that I'm living some of the most important parts of my life in a non-aware state. Thanks for any thoughts you might have. |
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| | #2 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Quebec, Canada
Posts: 3,811
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"What is the force that is controlling you even now and will continue to do so for the rest of your life? PAIN and PLEASURE! Everything you and I do, we do either out of our need to avoid pain or our desire to gain pleasure." This may sound simplistic... but all the decision that we take is directed by an effort to avoid pain and get the maximum possible pleasure... . | |
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| | #3 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,090
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Yours is actually not a bad way to go about making decisions. Sometimes no matter what we do or how hard we think things through it doesn't work out the way we hope. When that happens the best we can do is learn the lessons offered and treat it as life experience. In my decision making process, I use critical thinking, my gut feeling/intuition, and advice from others (their experiences or opinions, books etc.). I weigh this all out and come to a logical conclusion. Nothing is fool proof and sometimes we have to make mistakes in order to learn and gain wisdom. This has worked quite well for me and whatever the outcome, I know I've given my best shot so I rarely have regrets. | |
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| | #5 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,061
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For most of my life I would gather much information as quickly as possible, then consider my options and pick whichever seemed best. I'd then change my mind a few times as I encountered new information, information which I could have discovered before making the initial decision if I'd invested a little more time and effort. You can imagine the detrimental effects of such a decision making process. These days I try to gather as much information as possible, taking as long as is necessary, but if a quick decision is needed I'll still make it with the understanding that it is based on limited data (and all that that entails). I should mention that I'm now trying to consciously include emotions as one source of information. |
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| | #6 (permalink) | |||
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 225
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Thanks for the link. I’m going to really look it through tonight. Quote:
I agree with you on the “we have to make mistakes in order to learn and gain wisdom” though. Quote:
Yeah, I imagine the multiple decisions would be confusing for all of the people around you. Hah, I bet you kept everyone on their toes though! | |||
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| | #7 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Quebec, Canada
Posts: 3,811
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| | #8 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,090
| Quote:
Hindsight, as they say is 20/20. Of course, some of the decisions we've made don't look as brilliant in retrospect. That's life! We can't live it in reverse. Whether we realize it or not we are here to learn and develop. We will never make perfect decisions, nor are we meant to. We live and learn; and one of the ways we learn is from our mistakes. As far as pain and pleasure go, the outcome is often hard to predict. Pain or pleasure could also be short term and in no way an predictor of future pain or pleasure. Most success involves some pain and discomfort. To try and avoid it could jeopardize important lessons. Last edited by ZHereford; 05-21-2007 at 08:45 PM. | |
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| | #9 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 332
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When it comes to important decisions, I use one of two methods: 1) The Slow Burn: When failure is a luxury I cannot afford, I research the subject to death and then make a decision based on what I believe to be a thorough analysis. Examples: Before I built my deck, I researched decking materials, building codes, and lay-out configurations for 6 months. Before I built my dedicated home theater, I researched for 5 years. The "slow burn" is an appropriate technique when something absolutely must be done right the first time. The downfall of this technique is that it can lead to analysis paralysis. 2) Ready-Fire-Aim: Steve's approach, of course. For small tasks with minimal risk, I find it helpful to draft only the most rudimentary plan and then allow firsthand experience to be my guide. Another name for this technique is "Fail Fast and Course Correct." Sometimes in life, failing fast is the best thing you can do, since it allows you to quickly learn from your mistakes and move on. |
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| | #10 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,061
| Quote:
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