I Still Can't Find a Job

[CroMagna]

Hi gang,

As you know, I'm interested in going back to school to learn a trade and further my career goals. Right now I'm exploring the possibility of becoming a computer programmer. It's a job for introverts who are energized and at peace with solitude and you can wear whatever you want. It's a worthy skill and it pays very well. It fits my Myers Briggs Type Indicator of INTJ. I'm still in the exploratory phase, it's not written in stone, but I'm leaning towards this.

In order to go back to school or enroll in an online program, I need more money. But I still can't find a full time job. I've made a lot of progress psychologically. For example earlier this year, I was in and out of the hospital for schizophrenia and I was drinking heavily. But now I'm stable and happy. Another example, I was obsessed with the double standard but now I've made peace with who I am. Another example, I was obsessed with becoming a stripper while feeling like I was too fat to do it, going in circles, but I conquered my fear by getting hired at a club and now it's out of my system. Now it's time for external progress in one or two main areas, one of them career/finance. I'm concerned because time is dragging on and 2012 is supposed to be my breakthrough year.

I'm not excited about the idea getting a full time job. I don't think I would enjoy the process of being an admin or something in the interim. I don't want to be hanging out with strangers, engaging in dribble conversations, playing their silly games. I don't like making cold calls, acting bubbly to ask if they're hiring. I don't enjoy the interview process, being extroverted, which is draining, wearing a suit and pretending to be excited about the company. I don't like braving the cold in a suit and heels to drop off my resume and schmooze with the hiring executive, especially since in this economy chances are I'll never hear back from them. I don't like the low pay and prestige, the embarassment of telling someone I'm an admin, especially if they know where I went to school. The list goes on. Someone just started a thread that says that you should enjoy the process of getting to a goal.

I could work as an escort, which I would enjoy. I wouldn't be embarassed to tell anyone. It still fits my introversion because it would only involve people I know and are comfortable around. It also involves sex, which relieves stress. If I get six clients a day, I can make over $200,000 in one year. But it's illegal for some reason.

I could also be comfortable with the MLM Ignite. It's prestigious to say you have your own business. My sister got me involved in it, she's highly motivated to do it, and she's normally very conscientious about scams and things of that nature. That also involves working with people I know. Because it's a new company, I have more potential to make money. But MLMs have bad reputations where allegedly only the top earners make any real money.

I could also get books and teach myself programming languages on my own or look for websites with tutorials.

Perhaps there are other options I haven't explored.

Thanks!