I Still Can't Find a Job

[CroMagna]

Hi gang,

As you know, I'm interested in going back to school to learn a trade and further my career goals. Right now I'm exploring the possibility of becoming a computer programmer. It's a job for introverts who are energized and at peace with solitude and you can wear whatever you want. It's a worthy skill and it pays very well. It fits my Myers Briggs Type Indicator of INTJ. I'm still in the exploratory phase, it's not written in stone, but I'm leaning towards this.

In order to go back to school or enroll in an online program, I need more money. But I still can't find a full time job. I've made a lot of progress psychologically. For example earlier this year, I was in and out of the hospital for schizophrenia and I was drinking heavily. But now I'm stable and happy. Another example, I was obsessed with the double standard but now I've made peace with who I am. Another example, I was obsessed with becoming a stripper while feeling like I was too fat to do it, going in circles, but I conquered my fear by getting hired at a club and now it's out of my system. Now it's time for external progress in one or two main areas, one of them career/finance. I'm concerned because time is dragging on and 2012 is supposed to be my breakthrough year.

I'm not excited about the idea getting a full time job. I don't think I would enjoy the process of being an admin or something in the interim. I don't want to be hanging out with strangers, engaging in dribble conversations, playing their silly games. I don't like making cold calls, acting bubbly to ask if they're hiring. I don't enjoy the interview process, being extroverted, which is draining, wearing a suit and pretending to be excited about the company. I don't like braving the cold in a suit and heels to drop off my resume and schmooze with the hiring executive, especially since in this economy chances are I'll never hear back from them. I don't like the low pay and prestige, the embarassment of telling someone I'm an admin, especially if they know where I went to school. The list goes on. Someone just started a thread that says that you should enjoy the process of getting to a goal.

I could work as an escort, which I would enjoy. I wouldn't be embarassed to tell anyone. It still fits my introversion because it would only involve people I know and are comfortable around. It also involves sex, which relieves stress. If I get six clients a day, I can make over $200,000 in one year. But it's illegal for some reason.

I could also be comfortable with the MLM Ignite. It's prestigious to say you have your own business. My sister got me involved in it, she's highly motivated to do it, and she's normally very conscientious about scams and things of that nature. That also involves working with people I know. Because it's a new company, I have more potential to make money. But MLMs have bad reputations where allegedly only the top earners make any real money.

I could also get books and teach myself programming languages on my own or look for websites with tutorials.

Perhaps there are other options I haven't explored.

Thanks!

[James Fletcher]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

I'm not excited about the idea getting a full time job. I don't think I would enjoy the process of being an admin or something in the interim. I don't want to be hanging out with strangers, engaging in dribble conversations, playing their silly games. I don't like making cold calls, acting bubbly to ask if they're hiring. I don't enjoy the interview process, being extroverted, which is draining, wearing a suit and pretending to be excited about the company. I don't like braving the cold in a suit and heels to drop off my resume and schmooze with the hiring executive, especially since in this economy chances are I'll never hear back from them. I don't like the low pay and prestige, the embarassment of telling someone I'm an admin, especially if they know where I went to school. The list goes on. Someone just started a thread that says that you should enjoy the process of getting to a goal.

Is the economy really that bad everywhere in the US? It's just the way some people are talking they make it sound as if the entire country is plunging towards third world status, which seems highly improbable no matter how bad things may seem.

But what I'm getting at is, would it be possible to do a bit of research to find out if there are more job openings in other towns/cities/states?

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by James Fletcher

Is the economy really that bad everywhere in the US? It's just the way some people are talking they make it sound as if the entire country is plunging towards third world status, which seems highly improbable no matter how bad things may seem.

But what I'm getting at is, would it be possible to do a bit of research to find out if there are more job openings in other towns/cities/states?

I can't afford to relocate. It would require moving expenses and paying rent somewhere else plus food and traveling expenses. It's too risky because I could move somewhere else and find that there aren't any jobs there either.

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

Hi gang,

As you know, I'm interested in going back to school to learn a trade and further my career goals. Right now I'm exploring the possibility of becoming a computer programmer. It's a job for introverts who are energized and at peace with solitude and you can wear whatever you want. It's a worthy skill and it pays very well. It fits my Myers Briggs Type Indicator of INTJ. I'm still in the exploratory phase, it's not written in stone, but I'm leaning towards this.

In order to go back to school or enroll in an online program, I need more money. But I still can't find a full time job. I've made a lot of progress psychologically. For example earlier this year, I was in and out of the hospital for schizophrenia and I was drinking heavily. But now I'm stable and happy. Another example, I was obsessed with the double standard but now I've made peace with who I am. Another example, I was obsessed with becoming a stripper while feeling like I was too fat to do it, going in circles, but I conquered my fear by getting hired at a club and now it's out of my system. Now it's time for external progress in one or two main areas, one of them career/finance. I'm concerned because time is dragging on and 2012 is supposed to be my breakthrough year.

I'm not excited about the idea getting a full time job. I don't think I would enjoy the process of being an admin or something in the interim. I don't want to be hanging out with strangers, engaging in dribble conversations, playing their silly games. I don't like making cold calls, acting bubbly to ask if they're hiring. I don't enjoy the interview process, being extroverted, which is draining, wearing a suit and pretending to be excited about the company. I don't like braving the cold in a suit and heels to drop off my resume and schmooze with the hiring executive, especially since in this economy chances are I'll never hear back from them. I don't like the low pay and prestige, the embarassment of telling someone I'm an admin, especially if they know where I went to school. The list goes on. Someone just started a thread that says that you should enjoy the process of getting to a goal.

I could work as an escort, which I would enjoy. I wouldn't be embarassed to tell anyone. It still fits my introversion because it would only involve people I know and are comfortable around. It also involves sex, which relieves stress. If I get six clients a day, I can make over $200,000 in one year. But it's illegal for some reason.

I could also be comfortable with the MLM Ignite. It's prestigious to say you have your own business. My sister got me involved in it, she's highly motivated to do it, and she's normally very conscientious about scams and things of that nature. That also involves working with people I know. Because it's a new company, I have more potential to make money. But MLMs have bad reputations where allegedly only the top earners make any real money.

I could also get books and teach myself programming languages on my own or look for websites with tutorials.

Perhaps there are other options I haven't explored.

Thanks!

How To Become A Computer Programmer Without A College Degree

Half Sigma: Why a career in computer programming sucks

CroMagna,

Here are pro and con perspectives on computer programming employment.

My quick 2 cents? Try both perspectives on for size....and, if possible, corroborate your interest in this career path by actually talking to those who are doing these jobs (look up some resumes and contact the applicants yourself to get their personal views on how their search for employment is going).

You may find it very appealing to consider that many computer programming, or developer positions actually allow you to telework from ANY location, including from home, whether the firm you work for is local or not. How cool is that?

Hope this helps.

BTW: I am not a computer programmer, but I know some who are living the life I just described...

[CroMagna]

"I agree with everything you said. I'm now going to jump out of my office window as I have no future."

LMAO!!

(look up some resumes and contact the applicants yourself to get their personal views on how their search for employment is going).

Thanks!

I can actually do that?? You mean by going on Monster or HotJobs and calling those people, having them think I'm an employer, and asking them about their job search?

I may not do programming, I'm still leaning towards it, but in the meantime I want to know what I should do to make money.

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

"I agree with everything you said. I'm now going to jump out of my office window as I have no future."

LMAO!!



Thanks!

I can actually do that?? You mean by going on Monster or HotJobs and calling those people, having them think I'm an employer, and asking them about their job search?

I may not do programming, I'm still leaning towards it, but in the meantime I want to know what I should do to make money.

CroMagna,

No need to pretend anything to anyone. You would only be asking those who are in the field you are seeking information about...to let you know what they, themselves, have experienced. Just that, really. Your own ideas to acquire actual knowledge of a field you're interested in would work just as well....don't you think?

As to what you you should do to make money....consider a paradoxical perspective.

Seek something you would want to do so much that it wouldn't even matter if you were paid for it.....and do it.

Getting paid for what you love to do....is the greatest gift you can possibly give to yourself.

The alternative is to do anything to make money...which may give you what you need expediently, but will always take its toll upon your spirit eventually.

No need to pretend.

To invoke the scenario that you REALLY desire to be as real as the one you want to change, please consider this:

It is not what you are turning FROM that is important, as unpleasant as it is.

It is what you are turning TO that will determine the new result.

It is YOUR script.

If you realize that "script" is a metaphor for self-image, then the phrases "turning from" and "turning to" makes more sense, doesn't it?

You are no more required to repeatedly endure the treatment you have described than you are obligated to read the same sentence in any book over and over and over again.

Why then, would you want to "read" yourself repeating the same script (self-image) in those scenarios when YOU have the "author"-ity to change it?

"Authority"....get it?

YOU are the "AUTHOR" of your OWN life script....

It is YOUR LIFE....and YOUR SCRIPT.

BE THE "BEST-SELLER" OF YOUR OWN LIFE......to you!

BTW: It just occurred to me that you should consider asking for advice from someone you trust at the excellent university you mentioned in your OP....

Why ?

Believe it or not....the situation you are seeking....is seeking you.

Hope this helps....

[CroMagna]

What profound and excellent advice Guthrio! Thank you so much!

No need to pretend anything to anyone. You would only be asking those who are in the field you are seeking information about...to let you know what they, themselves, have experienced. Just that, really. Your own ideas to acquire actual knowledge of a field you're interested in would work just as well....don't you think?

So the plan is to look on Monster and Hotjobs, get the resume, and call the people to ask them about their jobhunt? Would they be up for that, do you think? And what do you mean my own ideas? You mean teaching myself programming languages?

Seek something you would want to do so much that it wouldn't even matter if you were paid for it.....and do it

There are many things I love to do, like reading, learning, discussing, watching documentaries, etc. The only think I can get paid to do that I love to do is have sex. So I think I should pursue the escorting. I love sex and I have a lot of sex for free anyway.

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

What profound and excellent advice Guthrio! Thank you so much!



So the plan is to look on Monster and Hotjobs, get the resume, and call the people to ask them about their jobhunt? Would they be up for that, do you think? And what do you mean my own ideas? You mean teaching myself programming languages?



There are many things I love to do, like reading, learning, discussing, watching documentaries, etc. The only think I can get paid to do that I love to do is have sex. So I think I should pursue the escorting. I love sex and I have a lot of sex for free anyway.

CroMagna,

Actually, the best plan is the one you decide to follow for yourself.

Toward that end, I noticed that results of the poll you posted, (which I did not take), seem to be overwhelmingly in favor of one choice....which obviously differs entirely from the one you've cited above.

I still think you could greatly benefit from seeking advice about all this from the school you attended.

Best of luck with your job search....however it turns out.

Job Search, Employer Jobs, Websites, Online Job Search Engine | Hound.com

[straysweeper]

One thing I've been asking myself is, if I had money or was a success, would I still do X? In my case move, go to college, or in your case escort or programming or other?

Money is all about adding value.

I'm introverted as well, but I think a lot on green techs or sustainability, or building something. That and green energy as well as physics etc.

One way is figuring out what people want or need and giving it to them. That is what Steve Jobs did.

I wish you luck in whatever you decide

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by guthrio

Toward that end, I noticed that results of the poll you posted, (which I did not take), seem to be overwhelmingly in favor of one choice....which obviously differs entirely from the one you've cited above.

The choice that the two people chose doesn't involve making money. Are you saying you're against escorting?

[VinceG]

Step One: Design your perfect life.
Step Two: Make the decision that brings you closer in alignment with that life.
Step Three: Take what you learned from Step Two and repeat Step One.

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by VinceG

Step One: Design your perfect life.
Step Two: Make the decision that brings you closer in alignment with that life.
Step Three: Take what you learned from Step Two and repeat Step One.

My perfect life:

I am an escort making six figures. I have sex with multiple lovers but I enjoy my alone time. I have lots of money to do what I want with. I'm financially responsible and paying my debts.

OR

I'm a professional who makes at least 40K. I have enough money to support myself. I have casual sex with multiple lovers but I enjoy my alone time.

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

The choice that the two people chose doesn't involve making money. Are you saying you're against escorting?

It's your poll....and your life.

What you choose to do with either is far more dependent upon what matters to you, than anything else....

Solving the problem you've cited in the title of this thread is entirely your concern....

That's all I'm saying.

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by guthrio

It's your poll....and your life.

What you choose to do with either is far more dependent upon what matters to you, than anything else....

Solving the problem you've cited in the title of this thread is entirely your concern....

That's all I'm saying.

It's really scary to spread my wings and just do what I wanna do. I've made mistakes in the past and regretted them, so I became stagnant to avoid making mistakes again. I guess I have to spread my wings and go wherever I want to, seeing where this life takes me. It could spell doom. But I guess that's better than doing nothing, which I would regret anyway.

[straysweeper]

I am new to Zen and I believe they say that there is no right or wrong, only the judgement of right or wrong. Via the cultural or social norms.

On the flip side, there is the precept of limiting, avoiding, or removing sexual misconduct. (Depends on which school of thought I think.) I suspect this is a way of not identifying with the body or its desires. Again I'm new so are my interpretations.

Maybe the Rocking Chair test will be of help? Imagine your 90 years old in a rocking chair, and how you'd feel if you did or didn't do each Path?

Whatever you decide and we send you love and wish you luck!

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

It's really scary to spread my wings and just do what I wanna do. I've made mistakes in the past and regretted them, so I became stagnant to avoid making mistakes again. I guess I have to spread my wings and go wherever I want to, seeing where this life takes me. It could spell doom. But I guess that's better than doing nothing, which I would regret anyway.

CroMagna,

I am deeply touched by your post above. I believe your heart is speaking to you very clearly....and you are definitely hearing it.

I can feel how concerned you are about the potential for profound regret and disappointment embarking on a path fraught with dangers that could turn out to be unrecoverable.

As I previously mentioned, it is not the self-image that you are turning FROM that is important. It is the one you turn TO that will determine the new result.

Allow me to provide two posts from other threads which may be helpful. I hope you will not be offended by their titles....

What is prayer, and how do you do it?

Why Prayers are not answered

In the near future, I would very much enjoy reading a post from you about how spreading your wings has propelled you to soar into a life of possibility that your heart is also trying to tell you is yours for the choosing, as well.

I wish you every success in your flight to freedom...

Fly....

[MariconesUnited]

I'll probably come back to this thread, but my first idea is...Have you ever considered trucking or doing deliveries? You have a very similar personality type to me. Last time I was tested I showed up as INTP.

I love trucking and being on the road. You deal with very little people and you have TONS of time to reflect and enjoy life. I would have been one in some other life.

[MariconesUnited]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

What profound and excellent advice Guthrio! Thank you so much!

Thanks Guthrio! I found your post as insightful as CroMagna did!

Originally Posted by CroMagna

It's really scary to spread my wings and just do what I wanna do.

I know. I face that same fear. Face your fears dear. It's tough, but it's most definitely worth it! Your wording made me think of a song I'm learning to sing...this one. It touches me deeply and inspires me.

Do what you love. Explore your passions. Don't do MLM. I've done extensive research on the subject and the ''best'' ones have a success rate of a little under 1%. I wouldn't feel comfortable succeeding in a system that depends on the failure of the vast majority, and I suspect you wouldn't either. Escorting: Do what you love, don't let your clients dictate what you must or mustn't do. Also...6 clients per day doesn't sound like a reasonable estimate to me, not even in the medium-term. It's a very physical job. Protect yourself and respect yourself. And understand that people judge escorts and you're not going to change that mentality all on your own. It's just something to consider when heading down that path.

[lycan]

Hey CroMagna. How is the diet going?

[Mariana Trench]

Originally Posted by James Fletcher

Is the economy really that bad everywhere in the US? It's just the way some people are talking they make it sound as if the entire country is plunging towards third world status, which seems highly improbable no matter how bad things may seem.

It's not that the standard of living is anything near third world. It's that jobs are scarce, even for people with degrees, and most people are living on debt that many won't conceivably be able to pay off. A lot of that debt came from getting the degrees that aren't serving them now, a lot of it came from baby boomers living beyond their means still caught up in a mindset of endless consumption and a lot of it came from people having to put gas on their credit card while they were making no money so they could go look for a job. Then there's the massive medical debt that many people carry because they couldn't get insurance. Those are examples, obviously, big chunks of them, but there's other things of course. And many, many people can't afford to risk a move.

[Mariana Trench]

CroManga, how about pursuing option one and four at the same time? Continue to look for work, and teach yourself skills to advance your career (there are lots of different directions you could go in besides computer programming too--I like MU's trucking suggestion!). If you do land a job, the income coming in will serve your financial goals, and you can continue to work on career advancement in your spare time.

There are too many risks escorting in a country where it's illegal, in my opinion, that's not a smart move.

Are the scenarios you laid out the only things you'd have in mind for your ideal life, or are you unnecessarily limiting yourself there? What would you do if you didn't have to worry about money?

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by Mariana Trench

CroManga, how about pursuing option one and four at the same time? Continue to look for work, and teach yourself skills to advance your career (there are lots of different directions you could go in besides computer programming too--I like MU's trucking suggestion!). If you do land a job, the income coming in will serve your financial goals, and you can continue to work on career advancement in your spare time.

There are too many risks escorting in a country where it's illegal, in my opinion, that's not a smart move.

Are the scenarios you laid out the only things you'd have in mind for your ideal life, or are you unnecessarily limiting yourself there? What would you do if you didn't have to worry about money?

I wish escorting were legal but that would mean more competition. If I go through with it, I plan to only involve people I know rather than putting myself on the internet and getting busted. I think cops should be ashamed of themselves for arresting girls for doing nothing particularly immoral.

If I didn't have to worry about money, I would do what I'm doing now, reading, watching documentaries and learning about politics, atheism, science, psychology, etc., giving advice, interacting with likeminded people, and hooking up.

[CroMagna]

Guthrio,

I too am touched by your words.

Originally Posted by guthrio

As I previously mentioned, it is not the self-image that you are turning FROM that is important. It is the one you turn TO that will determine the new result.

What do you mean here?

[MariconesUnited]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

I think cops should be ashamed of themselves for arresting girls for doing nothing particularly immoral.

Morality and legality are two completely different concepts. And they're growing further apart...

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

Guthrio,

I too am touched by your words.

Originally Posted by guthrio
As I previously mentioned, it is not the self-image that you are turning FROM that is important. It is the one you turn TO that will determine the new result.

What do you mean here?

....only that a desire to consider a change in your life is motivated by what you want to see yourself doing, such as finding a job (i.e. the very subject of this thread).

The "what you see yourself doing" aspect is directly related to the internal adjustments you're making within your self-image as you change it "from" one view "to" one you're contemplating adopting....

I'm sure you know that all change comes from within first....before it's seen (lived) on the outside.

The self-image you turn "to" reflects the image you chose to adopt for you to see....even if the world sees nothing at first, but what you've always presented to it.

Regardless what the world sees, you always know who you are because you are the complete owner of your self-image....and the face you present to the world...

I was touched by the honesty I felt when you revealed a little of what was going on within you (behind that face)....as you wrestle with the important decisions you're making for how you want to see yourself now...and into the foreseeable future.

My last post was an expression of my hope to read a post from you in which you tell us how you've not only faced, wrestled with, but triumphed over, this challenging time....just as honestly as you've told us about your struggle..

And also hoping that what we, collectively, have said herein, will help you do so....

[lycan]

Originally Posted by MariconesUnited

Morality and legality are two completely different concepts. And they're growing further apart...

It is not illegal to be an escort.

There are ways other than this to make money from sex.

[MariconesUnited]

Originally Posted by lycan

It is not illegal to be an escort.

CroMagna and I both think that it is in the USA. We could be wrong mind you, but the proof must be relatively easy to come up with?

[Laurenaus]

to your stripper job?

[CroMagna]

Maricones United,

Why do you call yourself that? Are you gay? Isn't that a derogatory term in Spanish for faggot?

Originally Posted by MariconesUnited

Thanks Guthrio! I found your post as insightful as CroMagna did!

I know. I face that same fear. Face your fears dear. It's tough, but it's most definitely worth it! Your wording made me think of a song I'm learning to sing...this one. It touches me deeply and inspires me.

Do what you love. Explore your passions. Don't do MLM. I've done extensive research on the subject and the ''best'' ones have a success rate of a little under 1%. I wouldn't feel comfortable succeeding in a system that depends on the failure of the vast majority, and I suspect you wouldn't either. Escorting: Do what you love, don't let your clients dictate what you must or mustn't do. Also...6 clients per day doesn't sound like a reasonable estimate to me, not even in the medium-term. It's a very physical job. Protect yourself and respect yourself. And understand that people judge escorts and you're not going to change that mentality all on your own. It's just something to consider when heading down that path.

I agree with you about the MLM. I've only made $300. It's a waste of time.

What do you mean by "don't let your clients dictate what you must and mustn't do?"

And why doesn't 6 clients a day sound like a reasonable estimate? Too much?

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by Laurenaus

to your stripper job?

It wasn't worth it. It was an hour back and forth, plus trecking to and from the metro in the cold, plus lugging outfits, getting dressed, putting on makeup, taking clothes and putting them back on, wearing heels, having to leave earlier than the other girls to catch the metro which the management wasn't too thrilled with, to not make that much money. I just got a fun experience out of it and moved on. Now I'm ready to make serious money.