Everything suddenly sucks

[BillyTheAdult]

I'm gonna make this quick. Over the last few months, I don't remember exactly when it started, but roughly since January everythings been pretty great. I've done all this PD investigating my attitudes, questioning beliefs, meditation, consciously breaking down barriers, etc. I really decided to try to change the things I didn't like for real. It all was going pretty well, not just that outer circumstances were good, there were ups and downs of course, but I really felt things had changed for the better, that it was a result of really changing some beliefs and the like.

Now the past week or two I really feel like crap again pretty consistently.It seems even like many of the beliefs are reverting back, my attitude is getting worse, and especially I feel physically and emotionally drained all the time. I don't know what I'm doing different, I don't think anything.

I don't know what kind of response I want specifically or even that there's anything anyone could say, so basically there's the description say, do ask, advise, berate, or whatever you want or think seems appropriate. I don't want to get back in a rut.

[ChrisGinsburg]

Hey Billy,

I've been there and I know what you mean, seriously. It's so vague at times that you're just like oh what the hell, where did this come from?.
Here's some questions that may or may not help,

Do you have a defined purpose you're working towards or are you practicing just letting go and moving with the flow?

Are you trying to do both and creating inner conflict?

Are you taking action simply for the sake of taking action or are you doing things you deeply believe in?

Did you try to jump far too into your mind and get stuck within it? In other words are you trying to use the mind to fix the mind and spinning in circles a bit?

Does this time of year have any correlation with past trauma or seasonal emotional disturbance?

[AngelPsychic444]

What could be dragging you down could be many things, so rather than give you a list, I would like to recommend a product. It's a pendant that blocks EMF's, (which is a big problem these days and makes peopel feel like crap) and also does a whole bunch of other things. This pendant could help you along on your path, it might not do everything for you, but will give you a "space"... to feel just centered and at peaceful, so you can go forth with confidence.

I have one of these myself and really like it, the angels I deal with also recommended me getting it, it's called a rejuvenizer, rather than explain the whole thing, it's better if you read through the website:

EMF subtle energy protection with Rejuvenizers

[James81]

Here's a little something I learned in Engineering class a long time ago. A small defect in a product (like a bolt or a beam or something like that) may not seem like a big deal, but when you consistently put a load on it, it works back and forth, back and forth, and that load causes stress on that defect and can, eventually, cause that member of the system to fail.

One of the most famous failures of that nature was the Tacoma Narrows Bridge. (Remember that?)

In a lot of ways, an idea can be like that. A particular idea that gets inside your head and keeps putting a "load" on it, can cause failure to the whole system (or induce massive changes). And that can happen in both a positive and a negative way.

Consider this...you didn't all of a sudden wake up with negativity and suck for a life. You taught yourself to be negative. You made a decision...then another one...then another one. And it's mostly because of an idea (or a handful of ideas) that got into your head and kept stressing the system. (At a time when you might not have had the resources to work through that idea or see it from another perspective.) That constant "stress" became a habit, and you habitually trained yourself to be who you are today.

So, it makes sense that, for any real growth or change, you're going to have this back and forth motion, where at one moment you really feel like you're making progress and the next you are right back where you are. We call it "two steps forward, one step back", but I see it as a "work on the defect." You keep loading that idea until it fails. (Which is why Byron Katie's "The Work" is so popular and effective for people.)

In other words, things aren't going to just change one time and then you'll never have to worry about it again. Permanent, lasting change (in engineering terms this is called "deformation") comes through consistent, daily transformations. Habitual reinforcements and experience for the new idea, and a boatload of internal resources to manage and work through the old ideas that give you grief.

[elucidate]

The same thing happened to me. I think that's why I ended up finding this forum, although I didn't think I needed it...but I guess I do, so I'll be paying attention to this thread, because I need help knowing what the hell happened as well. Everything was going so good and cruising for ages, and then...it's like I went backwards?

[VinceG]

You're a soul driving a human body. The human body has a mind. Both minds and bodies were designed to keep moving forward. If you don't keep moving forward, eventually you'll start feeling stagnant. If you let this state persist, you'll start making excuses to keep it around. Once you start making excuses, that's the end of growth.

An easy way to keep yourself out of ruts is a regular pattern of exercise. Many keys to the mind lie in the body. Just going for a walk can shake a lot of crap loose.

[ZephyrusX]

I really like what James said as I've observed the 'two steps forward, one step back' trend in my own life. In the past, I would get into some pretty bad depressive moods. They not only occur less frequenty now, but when they do occur, I tend to get over them quicker. Not everything in my life is perfect either. Some times I crash and burn seemingly out of the blue. But, on the other hand, I know that I must be making some sort of progress.

[Ceoarob]

sedona method

[ChrisGinsburg]

Originally Posted by AngelPsychic444

What could be dragging you down could be many things, so rather than give you a list, I would like to recommend a product. It's a pendant that blocks EMF's, (which is a big problem these days and makes peopel feel like crap) and also does a whole bunch of other things. This pendant could help you along on your path, it might not do everything for you, but will give you a "space"... to feel just centered and at peaceful, so you can go forth with confidence.

I have one of these myself and really like it, the angels I deal with also recommended me getting it, it's called a rejuvenizer, rather than explain the whole thing, it's better if you read through the website:

EMF subtle energy protection with Rejuvenizers

Those things are absurdly expensive. I'm sure it's not about the money though..

[Clint Cora]

You probably went off the tracks somewhere and didn't even realize it until things got worse. What you might need is in addition to all of this work and discovery on your own, you would likely benefit finding some type of group where people are similar in intentions and want to improve themselves. The interactions between like minded people can not only help inspire you but perhaps make sure that you don't get off the tracks so easily.

Although this requires a real active stance on your behalf to go out and find such a group that will work for you, the benefits are high.

[BillyTheAdult]

Originally Posted by Clint Cora

you would likely benefit finding some type of group where people are similar in intentions and want to improve themselves. The interactions between like minded people can not only help inspire you but perhaps make sure that you don't get off the tracks so easily.

I joined some meetup groups in my area recently, I found that it's often hard to schedule get togethers with adults though who often have busy lives.

[Clint Cora]

Originally Posted by BillyTheAdult

I joined some meetup groups in my area recently, I found that it's often hard to schedule get togethers with adults though who often have busy lives.

Stick to the Meetup groups for now. People do have busy lives. If you can at least commit to the scheduled group meetings, it's already a big plus in your life. Meeting individuals in more private settings is harder for many people these days.

[Hulbert Lee]

Originally Posted by BillyTheAdult

I'm gonna make this quick. Over the last few months, I don't remember exactly when it started, but roughly since January everythings been pretty great. I've done all this PD investigating my attitudes, questioning beliefs, meditation, consciously breaking down barriers, etc. I really decided to try to change the things I didn't like for real. It all was going pretty well, not just that outer circumstances were good, there were ups and downs of course, but I really felt things had changed for the better, that it was a result of really changing some beliefs and the like.

Now the past week or two I really feel like crap again pretty consistently.It seems even like many of the beliefs are reverting back, my attitude is getting worse, and especially I feel physically and emotionally drained all the time. I don't know what I'm doing different, I don't think anything.

I don't know what kind of response I want specifically or even that there's anything anyone could say, so basically there's the description say, do ask, advise, berate, or whatever you want or think seems appropriate. I don't want to get back in a rut.

I think it's just a matter of creating a habit. One week you might feel horrible and another week you might feel great. Sometimes a few thoughts can bring a person in a downwards spiral and into a rut. Try clearing your mind if you need to and then do something a day to grow yourself back in the right direction. Make some progress!

[Sansone]

I don't have the silver bullet, but just wanted to chime in that the same thing happened to me, maybe two months ago.

Just completely felt discouraged and felt like **** on every level for at least a week, for no apparent reason.

I wish I could say how I got past it, but I just tried to summon up some good positive awesomeness whenever I had the inclination. Mostly it failed but one day I was back to my old self and the world seemed good again.

Nobody can be 100% all the time, I hope it all comes together for you soon.

[ChrisGinsburg]

Originally Posted by Sansone

Nobody can be 100% all the time, I hope it all comes together for you soon.

That's a good point. Taken a step further, feeling like crap now and then can be necessary to give proper perspective on feeling good. It's the age old "I want light but not dark", "I want only the good and no bad", "I want up but not down". Much of life is like riding a wave. The important piece is being able to see the top of the wave while you're down low. Or being able to see that crack of light while you're stuck in the dark. The distress arises when one can't or refuses to acknowledge the fluctuating nature of life.

[elucidate]

Ya, I think without contrast we wouldn't be able to really appreciate the ups in life.

[AngelPsychic444]

Originally Posted by ChrisGinsburg

Those things are absurdly expensive. I'm sure it's not about the money though..

It's works great....it's worth the money! The woman that sell's it also has a money back gaurantee....I think she gives you 6 weeks or something like that to try it.

[Mynder]

I second Chris' statement about ups and downs. I've had the same about "spiritual progress". It would come in bursts, having me frantically dive in, soaking up all I could. Then a cut, and a time for just integrating and not thinking about it much, sometimes for months, at some point even two years.

The best runner can't keep running without any kind of break. Body builders schedule "recovery" times in between exercise days, so the muscles can get "refueled".

Sounds like you've reached a "tired" point. Slow down. Appreciate what you have achieved, and honor yourself for it, but don't beat yourself up over not maintaining that same kind of drive all the time.

Not only will you be able to slowly regain the energy you feel lacking now, slowing down, "stopping to smell the roses", will also give you an opportunity to listen to the thoughts that come up, and the things that somehow rubbed you the wrong way about that last "power sprint" of yours.

Unless it was absolutely and wonderfully perfect, I suspect you might have neglected some aspects of yourself that require tending to and acknowledging them.

[AlmostGodess]

Give yourself the permission to have a break and learn to have breaks. The ideal is to have a break before a breakdown. Your system will let you know when you need to take it easier and, if you follow these signs, you'll avoid moments of 100% demotivation.

Change is a magic word and all people need it. What small changes can you do to make your energy flow again? These are the things that work wonders for me: a new hairdo, a new look, new music, changing the place of the furniture in the house, some cleaning, a new fragance, a new attitude etc.

And if nothing works, I go for a jog, at least this is good my body and it's never a waste of my time

[Mondrian]

I don't know, but it strikes me that you've not been that specific in your OP as to the details of what you think and feel has gone wrong. Without identifying this it might be difficult to move on again. Hope things pick up a bit.

[Solipsist]

I've also been noticing something in my own life that seems like some sort of regression, so I find it not a little inspiring that you should start a thread about this, Billy. In my case, it seems like I've lost ... my "joy". Or something like that. Also, in my case, it's more a matter of spiritual development, rather than personal development, but I think that fundamentally, the effects are the same.

I found some consolation in James' words here--

Originally Posted by James81

So, it makes sense that, for any real growth or change, you're going to have this back and forth motion, where at one moment you really feel like you're making progress and the next you are right back where you are. We call it "two steps forward, one step back", but I see it as a "work on the defect."

I, myself, have been going through a rather dramatic spiritual transformation, which commenced with a major shift in consciousness. One day I was suicidal, and seemingly the next, I had so much joy and love in my heart for the world, I could hardly contain myself. Lately, my joy has settled into a deeper sense of peace, but I no longer have that sense of ecstatic joy, and wonder where it went.

But, as James points out above, there does seem to be a "back and forth" motion to my transformation, overall, to where it does quite often seem like a "two steps forward, one step back" kind of thing. We all have our highs and lows, and I firmly believe that how you get through the lows determines how high your next high will be.

I'm not sure if this works from the perspective of "personal" development, but in terms of the spiritual stuff, I can tell you that there's nothing to worry about. A religious parallel is that the devil goes after those most holy. Hence, those considered saints have their "dark night of the soul." In any event, the key is to be okay with yourself. Give yourself some credit for doing whatever you did to get to where you were, and rest in the consolation that, although you might be down now, it won't last forever. Nothing lasts forever.

[elucidate]

I was like this with being centred and not reacting. I used to be so good at not reacting , to anything, then suddenly it was like I was 10 years old again, and getting upset over every little thing people said. Like my skin had been ripped off me, only I had no recollection of it actually happening. One minute I am not easily offended, and the next minute I get in a tizzy over everything?

[Mounds]

I find for myself that life likes to go in cycles. Sometimes, things just plain don't feel right. Most of the time I'm on the rise or at my peak.

What I find useful in situations like this is getting active. Find something you know you can make a difference in and work on it right now. It doesn't provide instant relief but it can put you back into the positive cycle within a day or two.

Not so long ago, I felt very lonely. I ended up going on Facebook and messaged a bunch of people (old friends and acquaintances) about the possibility of going for a beer. The next day, I was booked solid and feeling good.

Might make an interesting thread for how an adult man can create new friendships. I'd be curious to see what others say.

-Tim