Belief in the hardness of worthwhile things

[Mondrian]

For a good while I've been wanting to find what I do in life to be easy and enjoyable rather than hard and unenjoyable.

I was also dimly aware recently that I believed that anything worthwhile, important, valuable should be the result of long, hard struggle.

I realised today that it is probably the conflict of these beliefs that has prevented me from doing something in life that feels easy, enjoyable and worthwhile, which is what I've been seeking.

I think I'm now bustin' the belief that anything worthwhile, beautiful, valuable, important, helpful is necessarily the result of lots of hard work, struggle, pain and so on (although I seem to have been through a bit of hard work and struggle to come to this point! It follows from aforementioned beliefs, I think ).

I thought of a few examples of things that are worthwhile etc. but easy to have:

-the money from a big lottery win
-the experience of a beautiful natural location
-birth of children

I wonder if anyone agrees that worthwhile things can be easy and enjoyable and if there are any good examples of this you have noticed.

I'm also wondering what you think as to the necessity of hard work, struggle, pain in connection with the worthwhile. Is it a 'mere' belief or true whether we believe it or not?

[Indiana]

Originally Posted by Mondrian

I thought of a few examples of things that are worthwhile etc. but easy to have:

-birth of children

Uh... I'm gonna take it you're a guy!

[Mondrian]

I get the joke, but conception is easy and enjoyable, pregnancy is basically automatic and labour comes of its own accord and can involve a relatively short period of physical pain but can be deeply enjoyable. It all basically takes care of itself, and for that we produce arguably the most amazing worthwhile, important, beautiful thing we know as well as the experience of it for ourselves.

[1by1]

can involve a relatively short period of physical pain but can be deeply enjoyable.

really? short but enjoyable?

Death in childbirth still occurs, and it is only thanks to modern medicine that the deathrate has been cut significantly, originally about 1% of births resulted in the death of the mother.

Plus raising a decent child is nowhere near easy.

As for some of the other things, winning the lottery is incredibly unlikely, you have odds of less than 1 in a million of doing so. Going to a beautiful place can be easy, but I find hiking to the top of a mountain to enjoy the view all the more worthwhile because of the effort I have put in to get to the top.

To me it is the hard work that makes a thing more worthwhile. The harder it is to get the less often we get it, so the more we appreciate it.

[Indiana]

Originally Posted by Mondrian

I get the joke, but conception is easy and enjoyable, pregnancy is basically automatic and labour comes of its own accord and can involve a relatively short period of physical pain but can be deeply enjoyable. It all basically takes care of itself, and for that we produce arguably the most amazing worthwhile, important, beautiful thing we know as well as the experience of it for ourselves.

I gotta agree with 1by1 ... no offense, but few women I know found pregnancy and childbirth especially easy. Having a child at the end of it made it worthwhile, sure, but it was no walk in the park. Feeling sick for months on end, extreme tiredness, pain, weight gain, hormonal fluctuations leading to ups and downs, dietary restrictions... and let's not forget the very real risks associated with it. One friend nearly died in childbirth. Basically, it's only worth doing for the giant reward. Nobody would bother going through pregnancy if you got a season pass to the theatre at the end.

Anyway, that's by way of a digression. Basically, yes, I do believe that there are things that can be achieved easily that are enjoyable. Lying on a couch reading a book is a great and simple pleasure for me (some people might find putting several hours into reading a book a lot of effort, I guess). But I also enjoy the rewards offered by doing something that takes sustained effort and concentration, like making a complex dinner, instead of just having tomato on toast, or mastering a tricky piece on the piano.

I don't believe much in doing things that are hard work and struggle and pain if I don't think the reward is going to be worthwhile, however.

What easy, enjoyable things have you been avoiding doing?

[Mondrian]

Maybe childbirth isn't that great an example although I think there can be cases where the pain aspect isn't as dominant as in your experiences. And while there may be more than what you would term significant pain involved, there is arguably not that much effort required in as far as the whole process is in a large sense automated by nature.

I also picked that example to see the extent to which if something so almost unquestionably worthwhile in principle could be believed to be easy. This is because I'm seeking something to do with the major part of my life that is both easy (or perhaps natural in the sense that childbirth happens naturally) and worthwhile.

Could it be that the sense of reward from something challenging or difficult is only so because we are programmed to beleive it so, or is the difficulty necessary and the reward from it a truth beyond our belief about it?

I suppose I've not been avoiding doing any easy, enjoyable things, only avoiding hard and difficult things. I'm not sure whether my endeavours are being worthwhile or not. Maybe going the easy way is taking a longer time than the hard way, or maybe believing the worthwhile way is hard is why that making the easy way the hard way is taking a long time. I obviously need to look into it! Thanks.

[Indiana]

Okay, perhaps a more productive approach is to look at what you see as being hard or difficult (but may have a result that you want to achieve) and evaluate whether those specific things can be considered in a way that you find easy and enjoyable.

What sort of things are you avoiding? Doing exercise? Studying?

[Mondrian]

Originally Posted by 1by1

I find hiking to the top of a mountain to enjoy the view all the more worthwhile because of the effort I have put in to get to the top.

To me it is the hard work that makes a thing more worthwhile. The harder it is to get the less often we get it, so the more we appreciate it.

I climbed in hills the other day and the ascent was pretty easy and enjoyable and the view was enjoyable in an aesthetic apprecition sense, in a geographical sense, in an imaginary sense, in a perspective on your own life sense, in a metaphorical sense. Many senses. Not sure how worthwhile but all pretty easy and enjoyable.

[1by1]

I climbed in hills the other day and the ascent was pretty easy and enjoyable and the view was enjoyable in an aesthetic apprecition sense, in a geographical sense, in an imaginary sense, in a perspective on your own life sense, in a metaphorical sense. Many senses. Not sure how worthwhile but all pretty easy and enjoyable.

Perhaps you can think of it like fruit on a tree... the low hanging fruit and easy to get at and fun to eat, but after they are gone you need to work harder to get the reward.

In the same way in life, when you first set out to do anything there are always easy things to achieve, that are easy and fun to do. But once you've done them the fun starts to wear off, and you need to push for the harder things to keep enjoying yourself. By all means start out on the easy tasks, but don't give up just because its getting harder.